Evening~
I took a sleeping tablet last night
I felt drowsy and then all of sudden out of no where
the effects quickly wore off...since when does this happen?
I have never had that happen before
so it took me a while to get to sleep
and the hopes of it sedating my body didnt work ether!
I woke up tired from fighting in my sleep
tired from the remnants of the sleeping tablet
I was in a mood or several moods this morning
I didnt know whether i wanted to cry, get annoyed, fight
i had no idea
I was all over the place
I tried my god to try even the playing field but it wasnt happening
i was suppose to be packing my stuff for tomorrow
but i couldnt think
that was annoying me
so in the end i got my trainers on and I went for a good run and it literally
was like a bloody run in the hope it would fix everything
it sorted me out a little bit
i was able to start packing for my 2 night get away
I had a phone call from the psychiatrist
about medication
he offered a anti-depressiant i had already been on in the past but its effects fizzled
out after about 8 months so i was loath to try it again or even antidepressants for that matter
and i told him this and that i wasnt finding my psychologist helpful
he said i could go on an psychotic type drug thing but id need a blood test...
a sodding blood test..
is someone up there laughing at me or what!?
gotta have a stupid damn blood test as the new medication is strong and they have to make sure my liver is functioning properly. Also it can counter out any other medication well has the potential to anyway. So its gonna take some adjusting but might be worth it
it best be worth it as i need a sodding blood test
ahhhhhhhhhhh dont wanna go
hate it
cant cope with this crap
so ive got to wait in the post for my blood form and go get it done
ugh
the agency phoned and said ive got work for mon tue fri next week
as the usual school and the same one i applied for last night
nice to have work it just best no be boring
but its work
i went out to the shops by myself
picked up pet food, hair dye for next time and stuff mum wanted
walked to my car and couldnt remember where i had parked...not usually an issue i have
yesterday i got in the car with adam and i was driving but didnt know the route
losing my mind
been packing and did a bit of dancing
i havent stopped today all in aid to help me sleep tonight
i have yoga tonight
we have a different teacher
we have met her but never been taught by her
we thought we'd give it ago anyway seeing as karen is away on holiday
and we didnt go last week
tomorrow i go away til sunday!
just going away with adam to sheffield
its th place we stayed last april where he asked me out
he feels the need to go back
he says hes got me a surprise which hes been banging on about for the last week
him and his dad suck at surprises they dont do surprises
they cant wait to tell or drop hints
i keep shutting him up everytime he brings it up other wise i will know
hes got surprise tourettes!
we're going by train, adam's dad is picking me up at 10:30am
i will miss my Ozwald and i hope that im not dying of hay fever
and my god do i hope im not mentally deranged whilst im away
see ya in a bit~
