Evening
I actually did sleep pretty well, I didnt think I would as I was playing Okami and getting pretty worked up XD
This morning I couldnt really be bothered with school, had stomach pains and such
My day at school was horrible. everyone is stressed out. the only people who arent stressed out are those in management. everyone is in a bad negative funk and its horrible to be around. school is just so terrible, poorly organised, funding spent poorly, the management is isnt even management. Its horrible. I was stressed out
whats more is people are still treating me like a full time member of staff. I AM PART TIME!!!
stop asking for all this stuff when I only work half the time. I have gone back to trying to fit 8 hours in 4 and it just cant be done. I got upset. I had had enough. i feel awful for jack for getting upset on him as he has so much to deal with all ready and is already stressed out.
He says to always ask him for help. but everyone always goes to him. my greatest fear at work isnt spilling acid on myself or burning myself. Its Jack burning out. I worry about him burning out and having nothing to give. Selfishly, I need him. He is not just my boyfriend hes also in a way my career and if he gets burned out, I lose my support and it will be hard for me to see him in such a state too of course.
I went home and had lunch by myself, I told mum I just needed to be quiet and go to be as I had had enough. I was a bit tearful. Its the despair of the job.
when i got up Jack rang me at work to see if I was ok which was nice of him. Mum phoned me also straight after to see if I was alright, clearly got people worried ><
I havent done much else all afternoon as I needed rest to be honest. I dont get to achieve anything with my afternoon. I did have a look for jobs but wasnt anything so i got the dinner ready and repotted a plant. Then Jack came home. We had dinner.
I told him I need to do a work out of some description but I am just not in the mood for anything so he suggested a walk so we are gonna go for a walk! the sun is out but its a good temperature and theres a breeze then it will be bath time.
injuries~~
my leg still hurt from doing squats!! can you believe that!?
I used this 'crystal hair remover' dont ever buy!! it doesnt work but what it has done is taken the top layer of skin off my arms, they feel SORE like sun burn sore
I almost dropped the prep room phone and my stupid reactions went to catch it and instead i hit myself in the face with it.....the outer corner of my eye and temple. It made me yell out in surprise! it HURTTTT like hell and it felt burny afterwards so ice packed it, its now bruising. I am hoping it doesnt turn into a black eye.....never had one before, we shall see in the morning~
tomorrow is another soul destroying day at school
