Evening
I keep having nightmares
so sick of it i really am as it keeps me awake
and you should have seen my bed this morning
even the bottom sheet had come away!
just how much was i moving in my sleep!?
at least im burning calories in my sleep i guess
my nightmare was that this child/doll/thing was after me
i threw it against a wall and it landed at a dodgy angle
but still got up...
then came at me with knives
we faught, there was blood
then it starting cutting it's self i asked it to stop then i had to watch as knives slowly seeped out of it skin blood oozing from the cuts
yeah my mind is warped to say the least
i mean where does that even come from?
i dont watch horror or even like blood related stuff
yet i dream gruesome things
and theyres really graphic too
ive been up since 4am
again...
im so tired
what with work and hayfever i am shattered
my eyes look like ive been punched as im tired and have literally rubbed the skin away from my eyes theyve been so itchy from hayfever
anyway today
school was fine
i kept busy and was helping both julia and jack
i made oxygen for julia i was rather proud of myself considering ive only done it twice and both times i watched and guided by jack and he wasnt even there to supervise this time
i got loads done
i hardly ate but still had bad stomach ache
just not fair
i came home in the pouring rain
sick of rain damn it
mum gave me millie to sit with
she took her as i about fell asleep with her and then fell asleep for an hour
i was done in
i couldnt be bothered to talk or listen i just needed tune out time
i havent done anything since then if im honest
just zoning out then getting stuff ready for tomorrow
i knew id find it hard to adjust to working full time
and what with not sleeping, eating and having hay fever
im struggling to keep up!
my leg hurts so much i have a bit of a limp
it is painful and out of place
i even drove home left footed which was an odd experience because driving was pulling my knee. but tomorrow i am going chiropractor and hopefully all will be well after the agonising placing of my knee joint. i hate hyper mobility
im just cursed
i cant even think about having it put back in
truly a necessary evil
tomorrow just school and chiropractor really
mum said she might come chiropractor with me which would be nice
god i hope i sleep tonight -____-
