Wednesday, 30 June 2021

Mummy is always thinking of me

 Konbanwa~~~


Taking my antidepressant earlier before bed actually really does help
I wasnt laying anxious in bed and soon went to sleep

I did my yoga this morning but felt like I would rather be going to sleep than going to school

we changed the bed before school and put the stew on


School was hard

its just too much at the moment somehow

I couldnt cope, my medication is making me so damn tired, its like a tranquiliser 

I am so shattered, its an fight just to keep my eyes open

I did feel the morning getting too much so I went to hide out in my car! Not the best thing to do but it was quiet, I could shut my eyes and breathe

I came back into school around 10am so I hadnt been gone long and I was just in time for Jack's £1000+ stationary delivery.....the crate weighed 117kg....yeah there was A LOT of stuff.

I told Jack I was struggling but somehow I was able to prep my lessons and finish my morning

when I got home I ate quickly whilst sitting with Oz and as I got up to go to bed the door went, it was mummy! I surprise visit ^^ She only stayed 5 mins as she was on he way back from having her hair cut but thought she would bring my parcels by. Not only that she had kindly brought me a little brown rabbit hanging ornament ^^ and a bunny card that says "Im here for you" it was so lovely I cried and told mum how hard it had been and how I wanted to see her. That I am too tired to do anything and I missed her. She understood and said she missed me and doesnt feel she is there enough for me right now but she is :)

I went to bed for 90mins and felt I could get the afternoon sorted

I sat down and outlined some of my painting which does look better for an outline. Id say I was half way there on the outline stage. Cant believe how long it is taking me to outline actually

think I will give it to mummy when it is done :)


I had a brew with Jack when he came home then I made some banana biscuits and then cooked his yorkshire pudding to go with the stew, the stew was bloody amazing 

Then we went for a walk as it was a really nice evening and you have to make the most of the sun lately as it keeps pouring down!

We just got back and I am gonna have my first bath in a week! Now my ear infection has passed I can have baths again. Jack will sit with Oz whilst I am in the bath then I will sit with him.

Im gonna have a hot chocolate tonight ^^


Tomorrow

it is school T^T and head of science says he wants to check up with me tomorrow or friday

but what is happening tomorrow is the science department is spending £200 on pizza....sweet jesus thats a lot of pizza. I cant eat any!!! Jack will eat my fill no doubt >.> my brother would on the scene if he could...