Jo is alive~~~~
yeah, I am back
I took a week off from all this as to be honest a lot of the time my diary is a chore to me >.>
Anyway as of today its been a week since I entered my 30's
can't say anything has changed XD
we had a rather difficult week at work tho. We are pushed to our limits at school
we both contemplated quitting our jobs. See, when youre on the bottom of the food chain youre expected to do more and more for less and less until in the end - you break
I saw my Jack, my strong/cool and collected Jack, break down in front of head of physics. Hes just so frustrated and had enough of it all. But on better news with him, he has a chance of school paying for him to do a degree at uni! we are still going through the hoops to get him onto the course. But I think basically if he doesnt get this course he will be off. Hes had it with school.
I could barely walk, I was in so much pain and it made me really quite sad.
when my mum came over friday after school she came saying her and dad would like me to have some treatment - treatment they insist on paying for
that was it then, the walls I had kept up to stop others knowing what was on my mind, my troubles and worries, came pouring out. I cried and cried. I think a lot of it was down to sheer exhaustion rather than sadness. Mum was like "im here to support and I want to get to you better! I didnt want to make you cry" it was fine it was just exhaustion. So she said she wants me to have ether reflexology - which does eventually boost my energy but I feel worse before I feel better. Or she wants me having acupuncture - which has the potential to help but I wont see someone other than Nigel as I HATE needles.
I agreed to reflex as I found out my massager charlotte does reflexology so I will book in with her when I see her for a massage on thursday
I didnt agree straight away
I talked it out with Jack the next day as basically I will be poorly after treatment, for whatever reason, it kills me off. Therefore work may be missed. So i said I couldnt have treatment as I cant miss work.
Jack said "Youre already having to have 1 day a week off to work from home cus youre too sick to keep up. Why not have that day working from home but also recovering. So what if you end up actually missing some work. You need to be selfish and look after yourself. Sod work. You need to look after your body more"
hes right, I am already struggling to keep up and having to recover/work from home 1 day a week now so hopefully if I time it so I am only poorly 1 day during the week like on a monday or something, it wont be too bad? ^^; i still feel incredibly guilty about all this. including my parents paying. I am 30 and have moved out but still causing them worry.....
we did our weekend chores but on the whole I did just literally recover from work, I cant believe how much of a corpse I was. I did have my hair cut and then dyed by mummy so I feel all fresh
today me and jack cleaned the house for several hours...looks so tidy and clean. We also had a rejig of the living room. My desk from the study is now in the living room! I like my craft room but I can feel isolated in there from time to time so I thought if I have a desk in the living room I can work in there with Jack and Oz. Also if I have to bun watch then I can still do my art.
my current art is still the picture for Jack's phone case but I would like to try out my new crayons from Jack ^^
Tomorrow
Lizi is coming over! for the first time ever! I am very excited as she is going to gel nails for me, I have never had gel nails before. I have asked for gems and the lot! I am also very happy as she she very covid aware but has said she will come over! I feel honoured ^^ it was another reason why I cleaned so much today, so she feels like my house is clean and not a germ pit. Since covid shes become very germ aware so I was gonna clean my house in the holidays anyway but seeing as she was coming over I decided to do the clean before she comes over. I offered to feed her but she feels happier bringing her own food which is fine. I hope she feels happy and comfortable over here tomorrow
so at 10am we have some guy coming to give us a quote for new windows T^T
then at 12 Lizi is coming over ^^
got my korean stew to put on too ><
