ahhhhh I have not stopped
how is it possible to do so much in one day?!
I didn't sleep too bad I was in bed for 9pm tho
and got up for a wee
I got up at 6:55am as i was under the impression dad had drifted off
to sleep again which he indeed had done
I got ready for children in need day
so i had streaks in my hair, spots, and bear ears
school i was in nursery til lunch which was crows control
and we gave the children 2 cakes each
so they were high on sugar
i robbed a cake too
then it was lunch and the dinner lady came through and said
the children werent a fan of the flapjack today so she brought a WHOLE tray through
so i robbed two
so ive had a big bowl of cereal this morning
3x biscuits
2 flap jacks
1 cake
im fat
seriously fat and ugly
want to starve myself but know i need energy to get me through life
anyway after lunch i was in the other foundation class
all went fine really
i had been to fetch stuff during lunch to do my group work at 2pm
so a TA could show me but because we were short staff i was unable to
do my group work
so 2 days in a row i havent done group work and ive explained that to the teachers
they say it cant be helped
so i stayed in class and we gave the kids yet more cake
jesus it was crazy
but they had brought in so much cake for pudsey day
i cleared up and stuff then dismissed the kids
at the end of the day the teacher talked to me and said how good it was to have me on board and how i get on with stuff and it helps big style
she asked if i was on any medication for my anxiety and i told her i wasnt but seeing the psychologist on wednesday next week
so we talked a bit about that
then i put the stuff back i didnt really need in the end
and went home through bad traffic
i just do so much at school i dont sit or anything
but i feel its getting easier as ive learned about 80% of the kids names
and im connecting with a lot and working harder with others the ones with needs
to which there are plenty of
but i think i am getting there
i havent felt stressed or over whelmed past 2 days anyway
i came back and mum did me a brew
i was very annoyed as some sequins id ordered on sunday arrived yesterday and i left them still in the postal packet and i wanted them for the guinea pig garland i plan to finish this weekend
well when i came to the packet today it had gone
dad had put it in the wheelie bin which was emptied this morning
he lives for bins like an old man
my brother had a good look for it on the table but i knew it was in that bin
i was so annoyed
really peeved me off
so when dad did come home i got told off by him
no "sorry" or "ill get you some more"
it was "dont like the attitude sod off"
yep he told me to sod off
at least i know where i stand
he talks to customers nicer than me
and if he does talk to me 'nicely' its about work
a subject i find boring so i keep to one word answers as he likes to argue and say everything differently to me anyway
i dont like him
my robotic dad that resembles a cog
hes the same on all sides, just keeps doing the same thing over and over, souless and plain
anyway wasted enough time talking about him
i did some yoga and mum bless her gave my very hurting shoulders and neck and massage
then i went for a 20 minute run as being talked to like that from dad boy did i need it
i really enjoyed it even if it was drizzling
i didnt see mia tonight as she takes forever to respond despite not working fridays
she said she will see me sunday but thats not likely to happen is it
i came in and had dinner
after dinner i sorted stuff out
i had ago dying my mum's eyelashes which went ok
then i changed my bed
saw my pigs
and done my ipod as i needed a fresh playlist to run to
then diary then its Oz then bed
ive been at school for 10 days now and it does feel a bit easier i have to say
and i pray i dont spend my weekend worrying over school
over stuff i cant help
tomorrow id like to do park run
but see what weather is doing
i need to get my stuff ready for that also
one thing after another
i have no time lately!
tomorrow is also my brother's graduation!
he graduated from Uni this year with a First degree in Photography
were all very proud and hes even won an award for his work!
i have never been to a graduation tomorrow so im looking forward to it
its happening in the royal concert hall too~
so i need to look human for that XD
we are near a bead shop tomorrow so mum says we will call in to see if they have my sequins
still getting through my xmas cards photos
this is my cousin's
