I hardly slept
like really didnt sleep
I got up and tossed and turned and yeah just mega bad night
i was sweating none stop, my hair felt wet
I felt poorly in the night hence why I didnt sleep
so this is officially my 3rd cold in 6 weeks -_____- my immune system serious sucks
I felt soo ill this morning
I had a burning nose like when you have water up your nose
my throat was cloggy my head pounded and ache
oh my god the pain
it was horrendous
I had some breakfast - hot chocolate
and went to bed
I was so dead to the world it was all I could do
I got up and had a shower this was 11am and I did feel a little better
felt better for rinsing the night's sweat from me
I ached so much I cant tell you how much pain ive been in
it was like growing pains but much much worse
in the end I pushed myself and went for a walk
im not sure how I even achieved the walk but I did
and I did it in the hopes it would help my pain
no
it made it worse - if that was possible
i started crying cus i hurt so much and nothing was helping
i was running to the toilet a lot and that was getting to me
I sat and had porridge for lunch
I couldnt see karen as I was obviously too sick and didnt want to infect her
so mum went by herself
i went back to bed
when I got up I had a brew and I sat with Oz
i tried going on my laptop but soon bored me
agency rang and said they have work for me at the school i was at last week
just for the morning in the youngest class
i like the teacher in there shes very down to earth, the children go early for lunch, i think i can hack it well i hope i can. Im suppose to see Seth tomorrow
so I will literally be leaving school and driving to see seth
god im gonna be wiped not to mention I have yoga also....
i rang the psychiatrist's receptionist to say could he ring me tonight
and gave her the list of antidepressants ive taken
and he did in fact ring me back!
he is doing me a prescription ready to be collected tomorrow afternoon
he gave me the option of 4 antidepressants
1. similar but 'newer' than one ive had before which helped me
2. one that helps with anxiety but can increase weight
3. one that increases weight
4. many have success with but has a lot of nasty side effects
so i said it was a toss up between 1 and 4 as any weight gain would tip me over the edge. I said which did he think I should go for?
he said "if you think you can handle number 4 then i advise that one"
and i thought 'well ive got the christmas period to kinda get used to it at least and ive been on many nasty medications before whats another'
i cant remember what its called or would even be able to spell it XD
so im picking that tomorrow - something else to do tomorrow whilst im feeling like crap
he given me the lowest dose of 37mg the max dose is 300mg so yeah at least i can build on it
the psychologist wont be happy but that will make me happy
so tomorrow i start antidepressants once again hopefully
feel like im giving in some how but yeah clearly need them
i did a bit of yoga to try and stretch out and help pain
did that for half hour
watched another christmas special we had on dvd
ive been trying to hunt out all our comedy christmas specials
found 5 i think it is now
only time of year i can bare to watch em XD
so tomorrow
school all morning
visit seth at work whilst hes being santa at a farm 30 mins away which is where Ozwald came from
then ive got my prescription to fetch
yoga
man im gonna be dead
id be dead without a cold never mind whilst i feel like this
oh here is some facial products i brought
one is a face pack that says you can use it 4 times a week ive used it twice in the last 3 days and my face is dry so no way am i trying 4 times a week! the other is a night cream to brighten the skin which my skin looks quite dull during winter but i havent tried it yet i might have ago tonight with it
