Last Scientist Done!

 Evening

Last night was 'date night' but we didnt get up to much as literally what can you get up!? its winter and lockdown. We ended up watching 3 episodes of inuyasha and called it a night

I didnt sleep that well ether so I felt quite tired this morning

but got up as I had a science department meeting that I felt I best attend as it looks bad if jack is there and I am not. But it was boring and not useful to us technicians

I went for a walk with Mia which was nice but tiring, the dogs were cute. But walt did poo whilst farting. It smelt and sounded disgusting. We both laughed in the end tho. And this is why you dont have dogs... She said she will see me monday and give me my present then, when we go for a dog walk.

She told me her 94 year old grandad, whilst recovering from a stroke, had covid...

he had no symptoms...he was fine. HOW THE HELL DOES THAT WORK!?

her mum said "will nothing kill that man off!?" XD

I got back and mum called in as she was 7 doors down so called in for a tea

then I had a bath and lunch and a sleep and saw Oz and painted my dressing table

then spent this evening working and finally got my last scientist finished!

Fritz Haber!

so hopefully tomorrow I can put the school display up!

Mum kindly made me some pancakes today, which are safe for me to eat! I ate some but gonna have the rest now at 10pm woo

she says she will make me some more, but at least I have something semi-nice to eat on my birthday

she said she found of from matt theres this massive allergy test you can have done to see what you can eat what you cant digest. its like £350 and in another town but shes gonna get more info on it and says i should do it if we can find out enough about it. cant imagine not having stomach issues.

tomorrow

is school -______- but last day this week!

2.5kg

 Evening

Didn't sleep that well, before bed I had that thing were I think I am gonna be sick so ran to the kitchen sink then cus it didnt come out that end it came out the other -_____- when I went to be I had stomach pains and during the night stomach pains. How unfair is that!? I am on this diet and this is what I get, to say i was annoyed is an understatement.

This morning I had a bath before work and Jack drove us to work

work was ok, I managed to keep myself busy at the desk the whole day with display stuff, I did managed to get away during their P.E. lesson so I started doing the display on the wall its self

We took another covid test and both of us were negative. I thought I had done it wrong as it was too easy but no, I had done it right. Surprised me.

At the end of the school day we picked up a blind for the bathroom and went to mum's for a tea. Sat with Oz. Mum had been over to my house during the day as she had no electric or water for a while as matt was doing the bathroom so she came to use my facilities XD she did clean the living room in return ^^ Oz has had a nice day bless him. I decided to weigh myself as its been a week since I was first weighed and I have lost 2.45kg! this diet works for weight loss I give you that! So hungry all the time ><

We came home with Oz and we went for a walk but got caught in the rain but I was ok, it wasnt freezing out luckily. when we got home we decided to take a bath to warm up, I had sweated a lot at school and I was quite damp from the rain. I feel better for a bath. Now we are gonna have the stew I put on this morning. Not sure what it will be like as it's my first stew and I cant put gravy or corn flour in it cus of my diet. It will feed us anyway!

Rest of the evening will be easy and just the two of us, as its wednesday which is Jo's night ^^ I get jack's attention all night XD nah it's our 'date night' but obviously dates dont exist right now!

tomorrow just working for home but hopefully can see mia for a walk

heres the title for the display im currently doing

Our Bathroom

 Evening

I slept really well after watching an episode of Inuyasha with Jack, he finished gaming with Theo and Harvey for 10pm ^^

My alarm went off at 7:20am, think I mumbled out "let Oz out" and went to sleep. Next thing I knew it was 8:30am!!!! Jack had kindly let Oz out for me ^^

As soon as I had breakfast I was cutting up raw pork for this evening, doesnt phase me

This morning I worked on my display picture and did some chores round the house, cus I need breaks from sitting down.

My mum came over to see me/us in the afternoon and had a brew with us :)

I took her home tho as she walked over and it decided to chuck it down. As it was 4:30pm I suggested taking Oz over too as we would be taking him over in the morning for bunny daycare anyway so he has gone over, mum had cleaned his cage out so hes got fresh cage.

But I always miss him when he's not here!

So when I got back I did dinner as I was hungry T^T sick of being hungry and never full for long. Carbs really do work ><

After dinner I told jack he could go game with harvey and theo if he wanted to. I have a headache and just feel like monging out so I have just been quiet and doing a bit of painting here and there just between coats drying kinda thing. Gonna eat my treat of a pomegranate whilst Oz isnt here. He gets disappointed when I eat something he doesnt like, so usually I eat orange at night with him, Oz does not like Pomegranate.

think jack is coming off his game at 10pm so we can watch inuyasha together and go to bed.

as tomorrow it is school. jack has campaigned against school/head teacher saying he will not be 'babysitting' the children. So he is coming into school same days as me but whereas I am 'babysitting' he will be doing technician jobs. He offered to campaign on my behalf so I wouldnt have to babysit again but I told him I was fine and didnt want to pee off the headteacher...its one of things i got upset over the other day as it stressed me out. I have no clue what I will do during lesson tomorrow tho :/ but I get a covid test should I want one.

so yeah thats tomorrow,  i will be putting a stew on in the morning which I will be totally winging as I have never made a stew before and I havent looked at any recipes ether!

Oh and here is our bathroom, finished in all it's glory. It is bloody glorious as well, LOVE IT!

sadness, 1.1kg, hamster

 Evening

I am back

after a few emotional and somewhat i guess depressing days

just havent been myself at all and have cried a fair amount too

ok truth is i have been crying so much my skin on my face was sore and my eyes stung and even after sleeping my eye lids were still red and puffy. Thats how much i have cried -_____-

I am not even sure what I have been so upset about. I have just been really...sad I guess :/

Just like a dark cloud swallows you up sometimes. I fall victim to it and cant get out of it. I feel next to nothing apart from sadness. My love for Jack disappears. Its so bazaar. The human mind is strange. I think I just close off from everyone. My love for Oz never changes tho.

Not much happened over the weekend, apart from my family coming to see the bathroom which they liked. and got a few jobs done. About it.

Yesterday I felt more myself and got more done and even went out side for a walk

Today I woke up and really had that monday feeling

I feel kinda ok, no where near as bad as I what I was feeling

i guess being on this diet doesnt help! Since wednesday I have lost 1.1kg! thats quick weight loss huh

I am eating constantly!

Today we got the bathroom finished as we needed to paint the ceiling and jack helped me with that

so its finished and I plan to take the photos tomorrow!

I saw my mum for a walk

made lamb mince burgers for dinner which jack appreciated ^^ i have been doing really well with my cooking and I never look at recipes ether 

Tonight Jack is gaming, he hasnt been gaming much as he has been practically babysitting me in my fragile like state...think he dare not leave me unsupervise. yes things were that bad

Tomorrow

just working from home really

might do some dancing or go for a walk

its less than a week until my birthday

people keep asking "what you gonna do for you birthday?"

well its winter and we're in lockdown ^^; I would LOVE to go for a walk in the woods but its all weather dependant isnt it.

then people ask me "anything you would like for your birthday?"

I HAVENT GOT A CLUE!!!! 

Jack has been toying with the idea of getting me a hamster, something to keep me occupied in the evenings XD and to give me some happiness but my mum think it is a bad idea and will give me more to do and stress over. I am in two minds, I think I have Oz who I dearly love but sometimes he is busy or needs to go home, I have enough in my life, but then a hamster is easy and I love them they are very cute and I feel it would make me happy. Just I would need Jack to pitch in a bit as Oz is mine and MY responsibility so to give me two pets seems a bit much but then my friends have had or got dogs! And a hamster is loads easy compared to dogs! I dont know I am still thinking. They are cute and I have a cage. I feel if i get one my mum will disapprove even tho she doesnt live here XD 

We have a new bathroom!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 Evening

We went to bed around 10pm as I was so damn tired

I ended up waking up suddenly at 2am with awful stomach pains and the need to vomit

not only that but I was cold and sweating. I thought to myself "am I sick?"

I felt really unwell, I left the bed slowly and stayed in the living room for a couple of hours til 4am and when I felt better I went back to bed. I got up at 7:30am for Oz and I knew matt would be coming over.

This morning I felt like death and looked paler than usual for me

I didnt do much at all and couldnt even be bothered to talk to jack, or eat

by 10am I had crawled back to my bed and went to sleep for an hour, felt a little bit better

I kept having Oz in for company and for my mood

Mum came over at 2pm, just when matt was clearing up as he had finished our bathroom!

God the transformation is amazing! I am in love with it and very very grateful 

grateful that we could afford it, get booked in so fast, and for the meticulous matt

his workmanship is utterly amazing. His attention to detail....it amazes and impresses me

doesnt do things by halves anyway. 

But everything is fresh, clean, inviting, warm and ours

it works for us. and helps my health. I am very happy

the ceiling and door needs painting but thats it everything is done. Mum says if she has nothing else to do tomorrow she will come over and clean our bathroom whilst we are at work. We weren't allowed to clean it today due to sealants still setting. We could use the facilities just not scrub them!

So we havent put everything in it yet cus it needs a cleaning down. everywhere is a tad dusty ^^;

I went for a walk with mum we were gone an hour, it was probably a 45min walk but mum walks a bit slower than me. Although she did tell me to slow down today not for her but for me she said my breathing was awful, i hadnt noticed! I think I am so used to weezing! I felt a bit brighter after my walk 

she came in for a cup of tea

then after she left, I ran a bath - not a stupid hot one just a normal one and we took baths after one another then had dinner. I had a leftover from mum - which was safe on my diet - jack on the other hand had some greasy fritters and kieves -____- any chance to have something not home made and full calories and he is there, just like my brother XD He was happy with his food

after dinner we did a couple of jobs, I got my new 60 litre red bin out nicknamed 'postbox' into the kitchen cus god i hated our kitchen bin. youd think a bin is a bin....just no. So thats one less thing in the craft room anyway! slowly clearing that room so I will be able to get it up and running. i suggested to jack last night that we wallpaper the craft room during february half term and he seems ok about that just says it may not be the best job ever XD

So now I am by myself as Jack plays his dungeon and dragons

he wont be done til gone 10pm so I will be in bed before then no doubt. I have however set aside a whole pomegranate for myself. My treat~ so I will eat that after I have had my Oz out for the evening. He is at bunny daycare tomorrow as we are at school doing our pointless babysitting with covid kids XD Jack has a meeting with the head teacher at 11:30am he has already told me he is apprehensive about it. 

first covid test, and testing for asthma

 Evening

Typically I had bad night sweats. Like woke up TWICE dripping with sweat, my pyjamas were damp for gods sake. Typical on the morning I can't use the bath!!!!!!

So when I got up I had to mop my body with a cloth which made me feel marginally better

Jack drove us to school

School was DULL

all the teachers I had bumped into said the same quote

"its baby sitting"

"it's easy"

"youll be fine"

"its boring"

all of the above were correct

I have literally sat in a computer room with about 8 children whilst they did their online learning, I sat and painted stuff for displays. Dull really theres only so long painting grabs my interest

I did however have my first covid test! Jack totally wussed out, he said 'he didnt have time' time out from babysitting? wuss

so yeah it actually wasnt that bad, it made my eyes water but that was all. The set up was more weird. It was the reception staff in the p.e. changing rooms all on their own sector doing different things, then we had to wait in the shower cubicles to keep us separate whilst we waited for the results. Luckily mine was straight up negative :) 

I had lunch with jack and returned to lesson

jack drove us home at the end of the day. We saw matt who said he had not been having a good day. the bathroom had really tested him....still not finished but we all get crap days. 

he stayed til like 7pm tho.....

we left at 4pm to see mum, have a brew with her and Oz

jack waited in my car for me whilst I went doctors

the nurse says it sounds like asthma but to get the correct diagnosis i have to chart my results for a month using a peak flow metre. so yeah. She also took my blood pressure and weight

blood pressure 106/70

weight 68.8kg

thats low bloody pressure even by my standards, and my god i cant remember the last time i weighed that!!!!!!!!!!! glad im going on this diet i fricking need it. bloody chunky beast.

we popped by mums for oz, did dinner but didnt eat til matt left. then I had a very hot bath as I ached like mad from sitting so long in my seat today >< 

then just sat with Oz, painted my draws and did chores. its 10pm i have washing to hang out then im gonna watch inuyasha with Jack

tomorrow just working from home really

Mummy's birthday

 Evening

Didn't sleep to great, kept waking up so I was quite tired when I woke this morning

the snow was still on my car ><

I had breakfast, didnt bother getting changed out my pyjamas, grabbed Oz and went to mum's

She was surprised to see m at 8:25am X3 I managed to see her for half hour before work anyway

whilst she was out I did 20mins of dancing but soo became shaky so I stopped and showered

I got all mum's presents together and cards, made her a cup of tea as she came in and had the girls on the sofa waiting for her. They were all after my banana so I had no choice but to share that with them....

Mum loved her presents from me ^^ I was pleased. I was just sad that i couldnt do much with her. It was raining, freezing and in lockdown.

But we sat and talked and then I said to her that I must do some work. She made cakes and I helped decorate them. Her friends came to the door to drop gifts off. One brought their 2 year old grandson, the first time I have seen him! He is the son of someone I was in class with in primary and secondary school, so seeing his child is an odd experience. But he was very sweet, surprised to say how mischievous his dad is XD I was dreading mum coming away from that and talking about grandchildren but luckily she didnt as children would be in the end of me.

Jack rang before he came over and said that matt had sealed the bath so it was unusable tonight AND tomorrow morning T^T so it meant we both had to shower at mums tonight as we have school in the morning. So he came over, ate cake with mum and had a shower. I sadly had to miss out on cake due to my diet >.> 

We decided to leave Oz there as we would only be bringing him home to take him back in the morning, didnt seem worth it. So I have left him at mum's which always feels wrong to me.

we made dinner when we got in, good job as I was so hungry. This diet is hard. and its only day 2!

then I was painting my dressing table, only painted 2 draws so nothing major.

Jack isnt gaming with anyone tonight so it will hopefully be an early night with inuyasha :D

I miss having hot chocolate whilst watching it tho 

day 2 and already missing things XD

tomorrow

I am going to school to supervise children. I am to be sat with year 7 (11-12year olds) in the computer room and find some work to do. I feel it will be a boring experience for all involved.

I am offered a covid test as well but I will see how i feel about having that done 0.0

then after school at 5:10pm I have an appointment with the nurse to see if I am asthmatic or not. Fingers crossed I am not asthmatic! 

next birthday in the family is me!! less than 2 weeks i will be 29 ><