it was freezing in my sleep

 Evening

I kept waking up last night, I was shivering, I was soooo cold! I had goosebumps. Each time I just said "I'm cold" and Jack in his sleep cuddled me. How strange is that? I can make so much noise and move around on the bed and he doesnt wake. I say a couple of words and hes there. I wasnt complaining tho as it helped me get back off to sleep :) I did feel tired, drained and achy when I got up this morning. I am not sure why it was so cold in the night tho. It wasnt snowing and i slept in my dressing gown and with a blanket on the top

School was ok

and Lizzie and Chris came to talk to us it was like a little technician meeting. I like it when we group together. 

I couldnt think straight all morning, I had taken more pain killers as I was aching so much I was just fuzzy and full of pain. I didnt complain to anyone I just tried to get on with it all.

I did computer work in the afternoon but didnt get loads done

I know what I can work on tomorrow tho as I am working from home thank god. Need a recovery day

Its weird not having Luke in tho I am missing him

We came home, had a cup of tea then I did dinner which was noodles, it was easy but I didnt enjoy it.

I laid on the bed for a while. I was so close to skipping out on exercise but somehow I managed 20mins of just dance with weights. I had a shower and now I am just on here doing my diary.

I was to go bed and play pokemon again

I missed my mum today

I told her I could see her for my lunch tomorrow so we've decided to do that I was tired after work.

missing mummy and I think shes felt a bit flat, I need to pick her spirits up

I hope I sleep tonight and its not cold again.

Jack's stomach is off I cant get him out of that bathroom since we've come home i hope hes ok.

nothing form fitting or clinging

 Konbanwa~~

Last night we played pokemon in bed, I drifted asleep but suddenly woke up at 11pm needing a wee but after that i slept through to my alarm so I didnt feel too dead when I got up. I was however really sicky anxious for whatever reason

I did manage to wear my new dungarees for the day. I did feel constantly fat and self conscious so I am not gonna deal with that again tomorrow >.> 

My day was actually pretty ok

we had 3 science teachers off so it was quiet I guess. But poor Luke has covid. No science lesson for me this week :/ might sit in another class's lesson.

I got my day done, did a lot of computer work which I still havent finished actually! cant believe how long it is taking me. Then I need to go through it with Jack

We got home and had a cup of tea then did dinner. Dinner was good as the chicken had been marinating for 24 hours

after dinner I looked online for a new disney CD for work and found 2 disk set for £2 so I ordered that. Everyone seems to quite enjoy it XD

now doing my diary, then I will dance, have a bath and then watch anime then go play pokemon in bed. Have an easy evening

tomorrow is school, I will be wearing joggers as I just cant cope with anything slightly clingy or form fitting

and seeing mummy tomorrow as well~

Jigglypuff Box Frame

 Evening

So last night I did my nails and was in bed for 9:30pm, I played pokemon but I was aching and not really feeling it and I wanted to see if I had stuff to do another box frame. So I went under the stairs and got my pokemon box out (which I have to move 5 other massive boxes first to get to) then I had a look at stuff I had to make it cute as I had found 2 eevee cards and it was eevee I was thinking of doing a frame for.

Jack came downstairs from gaming at 10:45pm and found me he said I looked pale and waxy 

I told him I couldnt sleep

he cuddled me in bed and told me to wake him if I couldnt sleep, he made me promise

I did try to sleep, I felt more relaxed with him there but I still couldnt sleep, I got up and took pain killers and stayed up 10mins and as I felt like it was gonna be a while I did decide to wake Jack. He made me fruit loaf and we played pokemon til 2am. Yup it was a long night for me! 

We woke up at 8:40am so we had a quick morning to get out the house for food shopping

I felt anxious and panicky whilst shopping, I think when you're tired you cant cope as much

we came home and brought Oz in for morning carrot he enjoyed that. 

Then in the space of 70mins I got

my soup cooked

biscuits made

meat cooked for breakfast

marinated fish for tonight

marinated meat for tomorrow dinner

I smashed it! I was determined to not be in the kitchen all day!

We had lunch and I felt like I could go for a sleep but didnt want to

Instead I cut and sewed Oz's new toilet blanket....

we went for an hour's walk as the sun actually came out!! It was a nice walk actually, and we havent spent any time together this weekend so it was good to do. Jack was gonna play with Theo again tonight but after I told him how anxious and worried I was about school tomorrow he changed his mind whilst we were on the walk. I said I would be fine but he said he wanted to be there for me and spend time with me.

We got back and had a cup of tea

then I popped Oz in the living room with Jack as he was just playing pokemon on TV

I was on my laptop looking for eevee things

I looked and looked but what I could find just wasnt doing it for me

so in the end the idea came to me, why dont I do Dedenne? it would be the same colour scheme so my work so far isnt wasted. I looked for Dedenne stuff and found cute things I brought the frame which was £10 and the dedenne stuff was £10. But honesty if i sold these frames I could make double that.

Here is my Jigglypuff one

Everyone has said how good it is.

We had dinner and now I am gonna take Oz home and have a bath and unwind. We are gonna watch anime and play pokemon in bed. I hope I sleep

not sure what tomorrow will bring as Luke has emailed saying "waiting on PCR test, expecting the worst" baring in mind he along with 2 other science teachers were at the school christmas party on friday. So if teachers need to self isolate or whatever, if we dont have enough staff in to staff the school, could the school be shut!? :3 thats just wishful thinking I know >.>

but really, why have sodding office parties in this climate....seriously. We were invited obviously, but we decided we didnt want covid and didnt go

mine and guineas pamper morning

 Evening

we were playing pokemon in bed til 11pm just cus I couldnt sleep. Even then it took me a while but I did sleep. Woke up at 8am and let Oz out, I was determined for him to have some outdoor time as he doesnt get a lot of outdoor time right now. 

This morning I cleaned the bathroom, cleaned Oz out and scooped my boy up and went over to mum's for 10am

we sat having a brew, I cut truffle's fur, both hers and tillie's claws. Then mum dyed my hair. I dyed my eyebrows whilst my hair dye was doing it's thing

Then I had a shower and dried my hair it looked shiny and healthy and my eyebrows looked uniform

I went to bring Oz in so mum could help me cut his claws but bless him he bum was in a mess. Why? we're not even giving him anything. So I said to mum I was gonna take him home and sort him out. I was home for 12:30

I released Oz outside as he was stressed out from the car journey so when he calmed down Jack helped me with what had to be done. I held Oz but he kept squirming and shaking so I had to keep putting him down (I did it on the floor anyway) and give him cuddles then let jack cut the fur again. He got a lot off him as when mum looked at it she said it was just one big hard clump there was no way he would be able to sort it himself. I took him home with a peace of bunny popcorn to chill out as we had stressed him out. He knew we were trying to help as he was growling or biting and he could have

we were gonna go for a walk but when I looked out it was spitting and when Jack looked at the weather it was set to rain all afternoon. Man was I glad that we didnt walk. It has been horrible all afternoon. So I worked on my Jigglypuff pokemon box frame and went to rest on my bed at times. I had brought Oz in at 3pm as it was clear he wouldnt go out and Jack was only playing pokemon on the TV so I left them too it whilst I did my box frame.

I broke off for a brew then went back, then did dinner then went to continue my frame until I got it finished about 7pm! I am really pleased with it too! It looks really good actually. Jack says its good. He has been playing with Theo online since 6:45pm and will be playing til late tonight, he did ask and I said it was fine. i am ok today so yeah he may as well. We just havent really spent any time together, think the only time we have been in the same room has been at meal times!

I cleared my mess up and went to do bunny yoga but Oz has been in the loaf position for ages. I think he was tired from his day, hes been to mums and had tummy ache. So yeah he didnt do much bunny yoga and I took home half way through as I could tell he was tired and hungry. So I popped him home for the night at 8:20pm. I did 45mins of yoga just so I felt like I had done some exercise today without getting sweaty and needing another shower.

I have had a hot chocolate whilst doing my diary, now I am gonna do my teeth, clean my face and do my skin care, paint my nails and play pokemon in bed. Should be in bed for 9:30pm

tomorrow

weekly shop

soup to make, biscuits to make, meat to cook, meat for monday to marinate, exercise to do and I have a blanket to cut up and sew so Oz can wee on it XD

I also plan on taking a photo of my box frame~

Had hot chocolate with head of science

 Evening

Of course I couldnt sleep last night, Jo does not need sleep!

TT^TT

I was up til 12:30am and really wasnt feeling it

But I got to school and showed willing

I borrowed a book from the library, no one had borrowed it yet it was brand new ^^ aimed at teenagers about the body, Jack says if I am struggling to work then I can read on the floor about biology ^^; It was because I was moaning about taking so many breaks and feeling unproductive so he said I can be learning on my breaks XD

Head of science 2 weeks ago brought me some white hot chocolate and he kept saying that we need to try it together, truthfully I was anxious about this. I was worried he was using it as a way to have a 'meeting' but it turns out he was just doing a nice gesture. As he collared me today to make us both hot chocolate as we stood at break drinking it with the other science teachers - nothing to have been worried about

I got my day done but couldnt wait to come home

I came home, ate fruit loaf with my tea and went to bed for an hour I was done and felt awful

I didnt have much dinner as I didnt want any dinner anyway

after dinner I went on just dance with the weights for half hour and did really well. Oz kept trying to play with me which was sweet

I took him home and had a shower - too hot for a bath

Now we gonna watch anime but dont think I want another hot chocolate ><

tomorrow I am seeing mummy

taking my lad over so Jack will be home alone in the morning

going to let Oz in mum's garden and cut his claws before I leave. Also trim the girl's claws, truffs wants a hair cut and I think Im gonna get mum to dye my hair. Want to feel better about myself

and then just do chores obviously XD

will I sleep later?

nah

slept and managed the day

 Evening

I took sleeping tablets last night, the very few medicated ones I have left....

I played pokemon in bed with Jack but to be honest I dont remember it that well. Next thing I know my alarm was going off. Those sleeping tablets are good XD Jack said I was laughing and talking in my sleep, I mean thats not creepy is it 0.0; he said the laughing was creepy  XD 

But it was a relief to sleep as I think not sleeping would have broke me

I felt drowsy this morning but much more able to cope with the day

so school was ok

the prep room wasnt too messy ether to be honest

but seeing the agar cubes Jack had made....I usually make them a nice light turquoise colour his were practically black!!! He went mental with it and the method he had used as well, he used my hot plate and it had boiled over T^T I made him clean in dont worry

But the agar cubes were for my biology lesson on diffusion. The cubes are suppose to turn pink. But jack had poured THAT much chemical into it that the simple practical that usually takes 10-30 seconds had reached the 12min mark......I am not even joking. We had to sack the practical off as the lesson literally ended XD

i was flagging a bit but got my day done. im not sure how if im honest

mum came over after school and brought my parcels and oz's new hay toy has arrived!! he showed interest in the box it came in and when i showed him the toy he knocked it over....but since filling it with hay he has enjoyed eating it

we had dinner my leftovers out the freezer gave me awful tummy ache, i havent been able to exercise as it got too late by the time my tummy ache started to go. couldnt stand up straight. so thats 2 days on the trot I havent exercised and I am trying to tell myself that this is fine. i will not be 3 stone heavier by the end of the week

i had a hot hot bath

then just doing my diary whilst fussing him with one hand typing with the other its taking me ages!!

He always DEMANDS fuss XD and we his lowly servants have to give it to him

were gonna watch anime then play pokemon in bed

I WAS going to take another sleeping tablet tonight but I dont know if I can face another day of 24 hour rank taste. Im hoping I can sleep tonight but HA like that will happen. I will probably regret sorely not taking the sleeping tablet but I only have 3 left....thats 1 night at best.....

Tomorrow is school

my day doesnt look too bad so I hope I can get through it

i made fresh agar up I need to try it to see if it doesnt take half hour as I have lost confidence in it since seeing what jack made

its also world book day tomorrow, and I did think about if there was anything I can go as but 

1. my cosplays are in mum's loft

2. the outfits I can put together are too warm to wear and work in

3. I wouldnt want to get chemical down me

so I knocked it on the head and just sod it and I will go in uniform tomorrow

another day off another round of cover art

 Evening

Ah last night was not good....

We played pokemon together and stuff and I felt tired and watched Jack play

He turned his switch off and went to sleep

I tried but couldnt sleep so I got up, took pain killers, came to bed but by this point Jack had 'man spread' he was on my side of the bed!!! So I tried to push him but he didnt budge or wake up T^T so unfair how deep that guy sleeps. So I crawled up and tried to sleep. He moved and so I moved over and then he spread again, crushing me! then elbowed me in the head. I decided at this point I just wasnt meant to sleep normally like all the other humans and so got up

from 12 - 3:30am I as drawing for school. My thoughts had taken a turn for the worse, pain killers were full of air. So I figured if I did my work during the night then I can sleep during the day

so I got this one done during the night for the space topic

I came to bed at 3:30 and I fell asleep pretty fast

I woke up to my alarm and I think in my half sleep like state I just declared to the world that I couldnt do it anymore, I had had enough. I just wanted to die. Jack cuddled me and almost looked in tears

I told him about my night, he said I should have woken him....

I took him to work but said I wasnt gonna pick him up too I just needed rest

so after dropping him off - made him late as I was crying this morning despite me saying I didnt want to cry this week but I think it was sheer exhaustion that made me cry. I came home and went to bed for 2 hours and felt more myself for that

I got up and worked, made some biscuits, mum came over for an hour and I had my lunch then I did some more drawing, fell asleep for an hour and did some more drawing and got this one finished for the light topic

I did a few things round the house to help Jack as hes been doing my job all day so I did some of his chores but he told me to rest

he came home and after a sit and catch up we had dinner

then I had a bath, and just sitting with a face mask whilst I do my diary. we are gonna watch anime, play pokemon and attempt sleep. I havent exercised today and I havent stopped eating. I decided I would rest and nourish my body in the hopes that  I will be ok tomorrow for school as I have my biology lesson and doing a practical!!!! 

but god knows what the night will bring

please please let me sleep,  I am VERY tempted to take sleeping tablets if I am honest. I will talk to Jack see what he thinks