Evening~~
I slept a lil better last night
when I woke up the postman arrived with 3 packages all for me
1 was a bracelet I got for my cousin for christmas (obviously too late now)
2 was a box of cosmetics Id ordered from Korea to try
3 was a mystery
I hadn't ordered anything that big
and when I started to open it I could tell it was anime related
which confirmed my theory of "I havent ordered anything else"
When I finished unwrapping it revealed a One Piece anime figure
I don't watch One Piece but I have a friend that does
and a friend that buys me anime figures time to time
So I put her together
It revealed this girl who I call 'busty babe' cus jeez look at the rack on her!!!
could he have brought anyone else with a bigger chest!?
I believe its a gift from Ed so I have just emailed to thank him
although a part of me wonders if it was his idea of a joke
as before christmas I had told him I was getting new shelves for my room
and Im gonna fill them with manga and anime figures
he teased me by saying "im gonna buy you a hentai or naked or a girl in underwear figure"
he knows I dont like that kinda thing
and here I am with busty babe so yeah
totally unexpected this morning
Adam had gone gym
managed to bench lift 85kg I only way 55kg
it scares me that he could probably snap me like a twig at times
I picked him up and we went for lunch
I had thai fish cakes nice but very filling I let adam eat my chips
We went round a few shops as I needed a few basics like facial wash, shampoo, reduced christmas wrapping paper, tissue box for my car, air freshner for my car (both for new car)
Then we came back to my house and we played pokemon played with Oz and the girls as it nothing but rained so they couldnt play outside. again --_____--
we looked at places Id like to go for my birthday
still very unsure on what to do there
I kept falling asleep tho today
I have dropped a pain killer (tramadol) and my god dont i know about it
but I cant believe how sleepy I was I fell asleep a few times on adam then once again whilst my brother ate his dinner next to me I ate mine later on after Id woken up
I had a second shower and thats woke me up a bit
My evening went to me writing down foods/meals/directions/greetings for my brother in Japanese as he goes Tokyo on 11th and I can tell he's nervous about it
he knows no japanese where as I could get by so Ive put him together a few notes even if he doesnt use em theyre there for reassurance I guess
I ordered a tissue box holder for my new car
some more cosmetics from Korea to try
that was it really today
not sure what tomorrow will bring
Omedatou~~ it's 2018
I did not see the year through I went to bed at 10pm
I was woken by the fireworks at 12pm but Im usually awake by then away
I don't sleep and last night was no exception
I was aching and the pain kept waking me up
gets very tiresome
So I got up at 10am
I didn't want to start my day I really didnt
but I did and saw my pets
I waited until 11:15am for my dad to finish his paperwork
and asked him kindly if he'd put my wine crates on the wall for me
it took him just less the an hour I stayed with him handing him bits and fetching stuff as I didnt want to seem ungrateful and just leave him to it and he didnt swear once!!!!! that is shocking
DIY = dad swearing
anyway my shelves are up but thats just half the battle!
now I had to spend a few hours sorting all my stuff out
thats what took a good portion of my day but I broke the day up with dancing and a walk
after which I ached big style, might take pain killers on an empty stomach tomorrow to feel the effects, I was suppose to drop a painkiller today as well but I forgot!
anyway here are my shelves!!!
Just above my desk, so one has plushies in with figures on top the others has the complete collection of Nura head of the Yokai clan, the other has the collection of Natsume's book of friends, and then the last has all of Chrono Crusade but Twin Star exocist is still ongoing it was hard to know where to put everything and stuff and then I moved onto my boxes under my bed, some draws yeah I had everything out today my room was a tip! But I ALWAYS have some sort of tidy on 1st January, its proven a sort out makes your mood better
Speaking of moods my mood hasnt been great, well being in pain doesnt help
ive got an extra pain today too as last night my finger nail was growing into my finger and had pierced the skin and it was throbbing so before bed i shoved a plaster under neath so it couldnt get into the skin anymore, woke up to find it had yellow under the skin which is infection so not only had my nail pierced my finger it had also infected it -____- so I had to rip the skin open on a very sensitive finger end, and I growled!! where did that come from!? that freaked me out more than the puss coming out my finger end!
Ive had all sorts of aggressive thoughts today it was a bit relentless at times
i could have had a panic attack 3 times today but each time i was able to get a grip before it took hold, i think its because im not feeling great or sleeping well on top of that people are going back to work and im not sure how i feel about work...
Oz enjoyed a scamp round my room with all my stuff out
then it went quiet and i found him under my bed
lazy little bunny its his birthday on 7th January!
so Ive ordered online some banana popcorn for him to try
he LOVES his food after all!
Tonight I might do a bit of dancing
tomorrow not sure what im doing I can't plan that far for some reason
adam is on about seeing me tho
im glad I was able to do a bit of a clean in my room as its how i like to start my years off
this year id like to be off as much medication as possible
to get my mental and physical health improved through the Pain Clinic and Psychologist
to save up for my France holiday and to actually go to France!
Bring on 2018~~
Evening all~~
Today marks the last and final day of the year 2017
should I have a quick look back at this year
changes for me this year let's see
First of in January I started work at the education agencies
I also met up with adam since high school
February I turned 25, a 1/4 of a century old! I also spent my birthday sick in bed
March I lost my precious Tiffin
April the day after April Fool's Adam asked me out
I also got Oz this month
May I started up having acupuncture and CBT sessions
through May-July I managed to work a lot at school
September my best friend Mia moved out into her own home
October I began dropping a medication I have been on for 6 years
December we rescued Maisy, it was also mine and Adam's first christmas, pinks made it to christmas which we all doubted
So I guess a fair bit happened this year which is great as I like progress
I got a job, my first relationship, tried to improve my health which is a constant on going battle, got bunny number 4 and rescued a guinea!
Right first a quick recap of yesterday
I spent my morning tidying and getting stuff ready to take to adam's house
dad came home and brought the 2005 Kia Rio home for me to test drive, my brother was passenger and we took it joy riding XD not really I was only gone for 10mins but I liked it. Just stunk and was filthy the previous owner had a dog or dogs - plural- minging and needs the clean of the century
but I agreed to have the car which is only 18months newer than what I have now
not much of an upgrade but beggers cant be choosers
In the afternoon I went over to adam's I know we played pokemon and I refused to go for a walk in the cold winds but I can't think what else I did
anyway later on that evening we ordered chinese food and I ate bits and pieces it soon became apparent what I do and dont like, less saucy things and not noddles or egg fried rice
but I was happy to experience it all
afterwards the 4 of us played on MY legendary playstation one and basically played for 90 mins on crash team racing, truly a classic and ultimate game and it was good fun
afterwards I pretty much went to bed adam stayed downstairs watching TV
I went to bed and left his bedroom light on for him
he came to bed and yes I was in top and underpants but that is not permission to grab my butt whilst I sleep!!!! >.> that boy gets away with murder for what he calls 'boyfriend rights' XD truth be told it really doesnt bother me and he knows it doesnt. I just dont appreciate being stirred in my sleep.
I didn't sleep brilliantly in fact at 5am I couldnt bare the pain much longer so I got up and went in search of my painkillers downstairs in my bag. Now usually when I get up for my pain killers in the night I end up having some dry cereal and a hot chocolate just so I have something in my stomach so theyre not taken on an empty stomach. But I wasnt at home. I was at adam's house. I did have a very quick look to see if they had any biscuits but I didnt want to rummage I really wanted a hot chocolate but that meant ether using the kettle or microwave both of which make noise and I know theyre not used to having someone up in the night in their house whereas my family are pretty used to hearing me up and about so it no longer wakes them. I didnt want to wake anyone and freak them out. So I went without. I did some yoga for 25mins then spent half hour on pokemon and at 6am I went to bed. Adam had robbed all the covers at this point so I was cold. at 7am I heard his mum get up for a brew so I dived out of bed to get up for a brew and some company. still no food tho. 8:30am came round and I could have more pain killers I took them with still no food I went for a very hot bath so hot I was pink and panting when I got out. at 9:20am I ate porridge but the effects from the pain killers had already kicked in I felt sick, dizzy, spaced out, smacked off my head but my god the pain felt so much better it really did. theyre more potent on an empty stomach and the hot bath helped. I havent taken 2 sets of pain killers on an empty stomach in years I forgot how good they work but they make you feel awful. I ended up sleeping it off for an hour as I wasnt fit to drive or walk straight for that matter XD
We got to my house so I could see Oz and my girls
I made us omelet and then we went for a walk as I felt I needed to get out the house
the weather was nice this afternoon now its awful at 9pm
we dropped into a pub on our walk and had a hot chocolate ^^
I drove us back to his house and I painted his mum's nails new years eve style
she loved em
then we played pokemon until my DS ran out of battery
they we had a play fight and cuddles and just enjoyed each other's company
i came home and sat with my girls
had a shower and food
and I was going to watch Angerme's new DVD but Im not sure if Im in the mood or whether to just go bed. Ive been up since 5am I am shattered.
Id rather watch it when im in the mood I know it's new years eve but I never stay up til midnight anyway I just get woke up by those inconsiderate sods blasting fireworks at midnight
so thats this year over and done with isnt it
bring on 2018 I say
I keep thinking of questions to ask karen's Angel cards its becoming a yearly tradition for me
see how they predict my upcoming year~
bye bye 2017 me~ you did well~ Ganbarimashita!
Afternoon~
I slept like crap as I was aching
and I ache today my Nigel's massage
my back and neck are still quite colourful
I got up and did some pet duties luckily Oz didnt need to be cleaned out
but did need rescuing from the rain he was just sat in
Maisy sat really well on me today and last night she didnt run away when I gave
her food in her cage shes doing really well
Mum says Millie always looks happier on me than her that she knows Millie likes me X3
I haven't done much this morning
I cleaned up rabbit pee from my carpet, lovely job
had a shower
and test drove my new car to be!
It was much more responsive than my car and will take abit of getting used to
before i have it tho it needs the clean of the century as the previous owner had dogs it would seem
and the car smells fusty and feels gross
i will ether get it professionally cleaned or do the job myself
adam rang me at 12:30pm he had finished the morning shift
he was only in 2 hours it was hardly worth him going in!
I said Id be over after 2pm
not sure yet if I want to go to sleep or not im so tired
Its so windy today its horrible out there i feel like I should go for a walk to wake myself up but its just not appealing right now
so tonight im staying over at adam's house
my poor Ozwald will be without me but I know he will cope ok.
Konbanwa~
I so did not want to get up this morning
I hadnt slept well
again
mum woke me at 9:30am
I spent my morning on pet duty even Oz couldnt play out due to heavy rain
I then proceeded in taking down the christmas decorations
didnt take me too long
then I went back to bed and when I woke up the decorations had gone into the roof and my Playstation One had come down :D the game is on!!!
I got ready to go out to Nigel's for acupuncture
He answered the door saying 'Merry christmas' I replied "yeah"
he said "yeah whatever" smirking
we both dont do christmas and he knows me now
theres no point in pretending to be nicey nice
and to prove that he gave me a hard massage which has left my back all the colours of the rainbow i can actually feel now 6 hours later where he's been. He also used normal sized needles on me which i havent had before he didnt tell me he'd done that til he had them out and they werent so bad
he called it a 'late christmas present' still smirking i told him to bring it on anytime
but he later told me he can see an improvement from when I first started going in May this year, and he said the normal needles show that too as before I just couldnt handle them but today I took them easily. i am getting better I know I am but its slow, 7 years and counting
I got home and told mum everything Nigel wanted me to try
including cutting as much sugar as possible out my diet telling me it makes my pain worse
which I can well believe
I was shattered when I came home but I soon got up and started a few jobs
sorted out draws in the spare room
shorted out and hoovered 2 of my own draws
cut up and stitched my old dressing gown into pieces Oz can use as toilet
design adam's mum's nails new years style
laid out with newspaper on my wall where Id like my new wine crates for my manga
practiced a little bit of dancing
I got my new Angerme live 2017 dvd in the post today :D
might watch it New Years Eve ^^
Dad says he's got a car ready for me to test drive tomorrow
so I have that to do
and at some point I am seeing adam
I told if he was offered work for saturday then to take it but his boss had told yesterday he had saturday off, today his boss asked him to work saturday and adam said no!!!!
I couldnt believe it as I told him not to do that, we could have our night another night
but he says he likes the plans too much to miss out on and I know he hates working saturday nights also, but I am secretly happy he's not working as our night can go ahead!!
we have planned:
Chinese Takeaway (I have never experienced this) his parents are joining in too
playing on my playstation one including playing against his dad
playing pokemon
having a sleep over
gonna be amazing! I can't wait and I planned it all, he went to ask his parents if it can all happen and they were happy about it ^^ I dont mind doing stuff with his parents theyre very easy to get along with and id hate for them to feel I was taking their only son away from them
so thats tomorrow!
i have the pets to clean out as well in the morning
im not sure what time im test driving the car or seeing adam
see how the day plans out
Evening~~
I've been awake since 5:30am!
I'm so shattered!
Yup my sleeping has gone outta the window once again -___-
really thought I was getting somewhere with my sleeping
Dad managed to fix the shower that started leaking last night
so we were able to have a shower this morning which meant I could get ready to go over
to Mia's house for presents and a brew
I got there for 10am
and eventually Rob got up as well so I was happily chatting with them both
we had 2 brews and a Krusty Kreme doughnut! a real treat ^^
at 12pm she needed to go out and also adam had caught the bus to my house
she loved my presents tho
I believe Im seeing her next week
I came home and 20mins later adam showed up
we had lunch together
then we went out and walked through a park to some charity shops
i treated him to a coke in a pub and then we walked back through the park back to my car I drove home and we played pokemon
I was in tremendous pain all afternoon I felt like crying but wouldnt do that in front of adam
we're wondering if too much sugar effects my pain
we've thought this before actually
So after pokemon I got changed out of my dungarees and he massaged my back and shoulders I did feel a bit better after that and a heat pack on those areas
he was gentle too as when he massages pain from his parents they always complain how deep and painful he goes, he was soft on me ^^
Then I took him home
Adam has this saturday off
which I know doesnt seem like anything amazing but he ALWAYS works saturdays the only time I see him on a saturday evening is if I sleep over or we go away somewhere
his boss gave him it off
so I said we gotta do something for it!!
I suggested that when I put the christmas decorations away tomorrow that I get the Playstation one out and bring that up, we play pokemon, we order a takeaway, we have a sleep over
he seemed up for it all he hardly says no to me to be fair
he's gonna talk to his parents tonight about it all
I got a txt from Mia tonight shes gone and brought two guineas which will live at her sister's house but one is hers one is her 4 year old nephews
nephews is called Mushroom and Mia's is called Barbara
what a pair! I cant wait to see them!!!!
Tonight I sorted out my make-up draw as it was getting hard to shut simply cus of all my make-up and hair accessories so I have thrown some make-up out I dont use or want then I treated myself to a new brown eye liner as mine is too thick for neat lines, and treated myself to a new eye shadow pallet which is Etude House Juice Bar which is full of oranges, pinks, peaches my favourite colours for eye shadow and make-up as you can tell from the photo I took today
i shall look forward to that bundle of fun and experimenting arriving
Tomorrow I am going to acupuncture which was originaly mum's appt but she doesnt want it and wants me to go instead and then I will put down christmas decorations
and dont know what else I will do~
Evening~~
Don't think I did my diary yesterday
ether way I stayed over at adam's house last night
so no internet for me~
My day yesterday felt longer than christmas day
just was going dead slow
I was invited over to adam's house for dinner and sleep over
so at 2:30pm I went to his house and me and his dad went to pick him up from work
he got in and showered and we sat around for a bit then I said I needed to go home
and see my Oz and get my sleeping over stuff
he decided to stay at his house which was fine as it let me have a brew with mum
we let Oz play in my room with Pinks!! he followed her everywhere bless him
not a bad bone in his body
Then I came back to adam's house
we had dinner which was turkey it was like a mini christmas dinner!
then we played Cluedo which I have never played and wont play again
that game gave me no satisfaction
then I got changed into my pajamas I got for christmas
I went to bed at 10pm adam was in bed with me and he said Id gone by 10:30pm
even with his bedroom light on. I was shattered
I woke up at 9:45am adam's parents had gone out
so I waited for adam to have a shower then I managed to have a bath
I was well happy about that as I truly miss my baths
and realized I had slept for about 12 hours and slept pretty well too
normaly I dont sleep well next to people but I must have been tired
Later on adam treated me to lunch I had fish cakes
then we came back to his but i wanted to go home and help with the pet shifts
adam came back with me we played pokemon i started my new Ultra Mood
and we had Oz in my room
then went to adam's house around 4ish as we knew his mum had made a chocolate cake
and its always amazing so we had a piece and it was so damn good
then I left for home having omlete for dinner followed by sponge and custard
my god do i feel sick!
tomorrow I am seeing my lovely sister mia for her late birthday morning
should be nice and then adam is coming over after his shift
so should be a good day i like having stuff to do
