just want the weekend

Evening

I got up for school
felt tired and done in
but continued on
sat with Oz who did actually want me this morning X3

School was long and dull
just nothing much happening really
i was on the floor for about 40 mins with low blood pressure again
just feel fainty 
jack told me to take as long as i need, then to take a further 10 mins as i always rush it according to him...
i started pushing a trolly through full of heavy physics stuff
and suddenly the trolly got lighter...i turned round and head of science had the other end...
he said "should you be pushing this?"
well technically YES as its part of my job and i could have mouthed off about this
instead i simply replied "no" he said "right answer"
jack saw and said "jo I'll take the that" head of science said "you tell her jack"
i swear everyone is against me at times....i wanted to shout "im not an invalid!!"
jeez, what they gonna be like if im ever pregnant or anything
yeesh
but im grateful really as i could have it a lot worst
its good for me mentally and physically that i have an understanding work place
i helped Julia out a lot today, washing up really as i had very little to actually do
but was well ready to leave and go home
i was just so tired

i got home and sat with Oz and mum
mum was doing well, she was rough this morning
i still did dinner which was very easy but still had mum in the kitchen throwing in her two cents....but got that done with and then i did some exercise even tho i was dead
i kept going dizzy but kept on
my legs were shaky afterwards
so tired
i cant believe i have another day to do
it feels like a 6 day week for some reason

jack has been online gaming and playing pokemon
hes a bit obsessed to say the least

tomorrow is friday thank bloody god

No more pain clinic for 6 months

Evening

I dreamed of my granny last night
that i was in her house which looked exactly how it used to
i could feel her soft skin and squishy arms as i hugged
i started to cry, knowing she'd die and whether or not i should tell her
she gave me a blanket she no longer wanted and i could smell
her scent all over it
i woke up but i hadnt been crying in my sleep luckily
i sat with Oz this morning but he didnt really want me this morning DX

School was dull
just a bit slow and boring and with jack going on about pokemon
id had enough really
my god hes obsessed with games, im not even in his radar right now
but what can you do
just glad im not like that
i left early from work to go to a pain management appointment 
which was fine, we talked about stuff and she was happy with my progress
not seeing her now for 6 months but i can go before then if i need to 
but i dont think i will even need the 6 month appointment to be honest

i came home and went straight to bed
id had enough of my day
woke up and mum had returned with dad from having her foot injected
i helped make dinner after telling mum 3 times to sit down and let me effing do it
honestly such a control freak she needs to have no weight on that foot
she was gonna shower tonight despite having one this morning
i was like "no just go and sit down for gods sake!"
honestly

tonight i havent done much
im so tired mentally and physically
not sure how im gonna get through this week at the moment
and im still totally blanked by jack
arsehole 

First walk with Walter

Evening

Woke up tired ><
not sure why
I sat with Ozwald this morning as usual
he was licking my hand, the hand I needed to spoon cereal into my mouth XD
he doesnt understand I need hands to feed myself unlike him

Work was slow and boring
like 2 experiments on and even then they were small
so I worked on display work
i had a meeting with jack and head of science
about ways to keep me in work really 
it went well and i have a few things to work out
im allowed to wear a cardigan so im gonna get one ordered
i couldnt wait for the day to end
i had science club at the end of the day which helped pass that final hour
we were painting the volcanoes which was alright i guess
not a relaxed arty lesson i was hoping for tho
more like chaos but still its done with

I've come second best to games once again with jack
if i hear one more thing about a sodding Switch i will deck him
hes obsessed and totally forgotten me
so ive sod him now and told him as he cant be bothered to see me in the week
im not spending my weekend with him
id also like to spend NEXT weekend also without him just so he learns
jerk
like one track mind and narrow minded 
hes getting a switch with pokemon tonight so yeah im on the scrap heap for a while i can see
so this weekend sod him i will do my craft work which actually does need doing
as i didnt have chance to do anything last weekend

i saw mia after school as i havent seen her in weeks!
we walked her dog Walter
first time ive been on a walk with him
hes sooooo well behaved for 4 months old i was totally surprised
and shes so in love with him
first time ive seen her truly happy for a while now
and it was good to have a catch up with her too
even if it was -1 outside

tomorrow is school
when i get home i have dinner to cook as mum is actually having the injection on 
her foot so shes outta action
and thats it really

My bacteria

Evening

Didn't sleep great
and woke up feeling rough and knowing i wasnt 100% recovered
from friday and saturday...
still I got ready for school~

It was insec day
so it was non-uniform day
i went in a cute bunny jumper and wore a bunny ear hair clip
i had lots of people say how much they liked my outfit and how cute it was
even tho it was from charity shop XD
i stand out at school to say the least

school was alright
i managed
i wrote my notes up from friday
and got other bits and pieces done
i showed my bacteria which impressed jack and julia
i had to kill all but one ><

i felt unwell towards the afternoon and had to lay on my back 
in the prep room office 
jack made me sweet tea and i managed to get through the last 2 hours
its really frustrating when that happens
its like my blood pressure just plummets and i have to stop
but Jo doesnt like to stop

i got home and sat with the babies and Ozwald
then i fell asleep for half hour
got up and made myself a salad
then i went for a walk in the freezing -3c outside world
then just got my stuff ready for school tomorrow
as sadly i have to be in uniform 
tomorrow im having a little meeting with head of science and jack
just to talk about little changes ive gotta do in order to keep myself in work
gotta look after myself better basically
not looking forward to i as i always feel a bit attention seeky 

Microbiology Course! Birmingham Convention 2019! + its been 9 months!

Konbanwa~~~~

I have been away haven't I XD

Ok so friday
was a different friday for Jo
i had to start my day at 5:20am
I drove 67 miles to Peterborough
I have never driven that far before 0.0
it took me 2 hours...

the day its self was really good tho
I learned loads about micro biology 
we got to do experiments and it felt like i was in a science class
everything had been prepped for me and i had to the experiment
like i was student XD
we messed round with bacteria and got to take some home - lovely
i had free lunch but i mainly stocked up on biscuits
it took me over 2 hours to get home
i was well and truly dead by the end of it
but it was a really good achievement for me
i made loads of notes that i will write up at school
I then had dinner, saw Oz and then went to jacks at 9pm
i was well dead
theo was there and jack had been watching a film with him
i told him to finish the film as i was going bed and didnt need him there
i just needed sleep!

saturday
we woke up at 5:20am
another 5am start...
and I got ready for the convention 
but we were late leaving so we were running through the town centre
at 6:30am it was empty and i was just running dressed as japanese school girl
god knows how that must have looked on CCTV
we caught the train with 2 mins to spare!!
arriving in Birmingham for the convention!
I have been to Birmingham NEC before but I went with lynn for the festival of quilts
i havent been to the Birmingham convention
it was HUGE
probably biggest one ive been too
the london one is big but its just repeated stalls its rubbish
this one was just massive
i took a couple of photos whilst waiting to go in
i went as Mirai from Beyond the Boundary 

we walked round and there was sooooo much i could have brought
honestly if i had the room and money i would have brought a lot more but 
here is the little bits i did pick up
pokemon figures for the terrariums i want to make :3

stuff I got in a £5 lucky bag which i was pleased with

a digimon t-shirt which was the last one so a bit big but i had to have it, its patamon!! 

badges jack brought me and a little science chibi badge that ive put on my lab coat

and of course a plush!!! I have named him Cosmo as his fabric is like a cosmic galaxy
both jack and mum love him ^^

we had a drink and a piece of cake cus i was starting to get shaky
i could feel i was struggling
friday had been a big ask on my body
and walking round this place was starting to hurt....
but we managed it all and brought some lunch to eat before getting on the train home
by which point i was struggling to walk
jack was carrying everything as he had done all day
and i could tell he was worried
upon getting on the train there was no seats...
i told him that my legs werent strong so to help me
i was starting to feel unwell
and we looked behind us in 1st class and jack just made me sit in there as it was practically empty, the ticket guy came round and just sat to move once seats become available which was nice of him as i was on the verge of tears i was in THAT much pain
id held out all day but my god
i was walking like an old person not a 27 year old
we took the tram from the train station as i was struggling that much

jack helped me once we were at his
i dosed up on tablets
and said i didnt think i could drive home
so he told me to stay as i had enough medication
i had a hot bath and rest and i did feel a bit better
we finished off the evening watching the last digimon tri and eating pizza
perfect day to celebrate 9 months together!!! we've done well ^^
we were in bed for 9:30pm

today i woke up at 9:30am feeling like id been ran over
i needed pain killers 
we lazed round and watched anime then i came home
showered, ate and went to bed
i was exhausted
ive done some yoga but even that was a hard ask
my body is to tired
god knows how work will go
but tomorrow is insec day so no lessons and non uniform!
so it wont be a big ask on me at least

despite how crap i do feel im grateful i can do what i have done
and im not in bed for like a week
i can keep going

Got to leave early cus of the rain! :D

Evening~~~

I was awake from 5am
so I felt quite tired
woke up to rain...
I ate breakfast with the Ozwald X3

work was slow
I realised it had gotten to 11:30am and I hadnt really done anything!
id chatted and done odd little jobs like paint my volcano and started a terrarium
jack said it was about time I actually did something XD
and I did...slowly XD
i only had 1 practical all day and that was last lesson

I had to work out what was happening tomorrow
as I wont be at school as im going on that micro biology course
the one i gotta drive 67 miles for...
anyway so i realised it was just luke doing the practicals
ive prepped everything but the yeast has to be made up and hour before lesson
so i got it all ready to be made up, weighed out and everything 
jack has a timer set on his phone when it has to be made up and put into a water bath
i hope he does ok for luke as its important to me
im sure he will be fine
to be honest we're wondering if school will be cancelled as we were told to finish up
at 3:05 and get home due to flooding 
i didnt have to be told twice i quickly got it together and left

it had not stopped raining today and heavy rain at that
plus alll the leaves from the trees are blocking the drains
i left school not being able to see the pavements as it had flooded outside the gates
my god i was  grateful the carpark was on a slope 0.0
i didnt get wet
but going home the roads were soooo bad!
i saw the water coming over the tires in areas

i got home and sat with the girls and oz
truffle was mardy to say the least 
 oz was good boy bless him
i crawled to bed and slept i was so drained
id drifted off to sleep during lunch, jack decided on letting me have 15mins extra lunch
so i ended up waking up to the bell
i was just knackered 

doesnt stop me needing to do exercise tho does it :/
i said to jack id take it easy for tomorrow
but ive been doing light dancing in my room
i have my stuff ready tomorrow
i gotta take my lab coat tomorrow
its like 1 hour 20 mins drive
im allowing 2 hours cus i just am
gotta get up at 5:20am and leave at 7am
gonna be so dark when i leave!
it should be good tho, i just hope they dont talk in science mumbo jumbo
otherwise i will tune off and just doodle

i will get home at some point in the evening tomorrow
then have dinner at home and then go to jack's
then i will stay there and get up at the crack of dawn to go to the convention!
gonna be bus and no doubt dead

not sure when i will blog next~

lock down and cosplay

Evening

I keep having nightmares
I woke up bolt up right when I was dreaming about someone
planting my face into the concrete floor with force
i luckily went back to sleep 

this morning my head just wasnt with it
felt like i screwed up a lot at work
but there was a lot of practicals going off
a lot of solutions needing making up
we had 'lock down drill' which is basically like a fire drill but for a lock down
which is the event in which an intruder is on the school site
so teachers have to hide 30 students in their classrooms suddenly
we got to stay in the prep room drinking tea XD
but for head of biology and luke, it meant their required practical lesson was disrupted 
so they were stressing
but like was bragging how he had a-level students so 18 year olds
and how theyd be well behaved
turns out in the deadly silence of the lock down a student in his class thought
it appropriate to play on his phone gun shot sound effects
i found it funny, its just the stupidity of teenagers
yeah that kid got excluded for tomorrow XD
hope he thought it was worth it
we were only in lock down for like 15 mins

i got home and sat with mum a bit
Oz was no where to be seen in the shed
until i did find him
sat with him on the sofa and mum said "dont you fall asleep with him"
i was laying down with my face next to him
and i fell asleep
he stayed sat down next to me the whole time bless him X3

i got a load of stuff in the post today
my shakugan no shana cosplay being one of them
and cute hair accessories 
heres a new eye shadow thing i have to have a go with

i got up and had dinner and went for a cold walk then a warm shower
i hope i sleep tonight anyway

tomorrow is school
nothing special really