a further £180 to the house fund

Konbanwa~

God I could not sleep last night
I was up til 2:30am and then I got up til 4am as I felt sick with pain and pain killers
so I went downstairs and had more pain relief and cereal woo
then I got rudely awoken at 8am by my mother - reminding me I needed to get up
to go take my car to my dad for body work repair >.>
so we did that after we saw the pets - cant begin your day without seeing the pets

then we went to one home store - Dunelm
where Jo spent a crazy £180....yeah moving house is expensive 0.0
i mean people say moving out is expensive and to stay at home for as long as you can to save up
good bloody job i saved up huh 0.0
it was just on things like towels and bedding and a new kettle and few kitchen utensils
that crap you know
we were gonna go to another home store but we didnt need to and my purse was in pieces....

we got back and i felt so tired from shopping an hour and just everything
that i went to bed
when i got up I had my lunch and met mia and her hounds for a walk which was nice actually
we talked about different things and she told me what she had managed to get for me from rob's grandads house too, cant wait to see my free goodies after today's spendage 
Jack did offer to pay some money towards it all but its up to him, im not forcing him to do that
its my choice what i decided to buy - some things i could get cheaper but i knew wouldnt last as long or be as good quality like the bed sheets and towels for example

i came home after sitting with mia and her dogs in her parents garden where we watched them wrestle each other. i mean i would have happily have got down and wrestled them too XD
i did 15mins of dance but i was too hot and tired so i stopped
and i had my dinner
then started work on the coaster
i can happily say they are all ready for the photoshop stage!! thank god -___-
been doing them for bloody forever!
they do look good and i do like them but at the end of the day its just a bit of art for a coaster XD i think i started them when i decided i was moving out NEXT year not in the next few months. so i thought i had shed loads of time to waste on such things
now i have other stuff i need to make and draw!
i ordered fabric to make a hammock to put my plushies in as i know that i will have a double bed in the middle of a room, not a single against a wall. therefore theyre all gonna fall on the floor T^T i can not allow this to happen so im making a hammock to keep them safe :3

tomorrow
in the morning I am seeing mia
we are going for a walk with her dogs, she said i can come to hers after for a brew but i dont have my car back yet - it took longer than thought (hitting like £100 mark)
so i can still go over i just will need to walk back to here and it depends if i have the energy or not
i shall see how i feel tomorrow 
then i will probably work on some form of art i guess

feels like its gonna be an expensive month this month

Pokemon Pots

Evening

I totally forgot to do my diary yesterday! didnt realise til 10pm and by which point I was cuddled up in bed with my plushies X3
Yesterday I did my usual exercises and such and then took photos of the pots I had been painting

theyre so cute right, I did Oddish and Bulbasaur
jack likes them

I got asked several times by my parents "are you not seeing jack today then?"
nope. kinda just wanted my own company
nothing against him, i just wanted to be in my own world really
so i did a bit of drawing, went for a good walk with my mum, slept, helped with dinner, trimmed truffle's fur. just a slow day. my body felt exhausted for some reason
i was on my laptop looking at bits to buy for future house, i know what colour i want my bedroom so i was able to buy some sheets for the bed. I have gone for 2 different designs, similar colours but both have a bunny design on X3 i dont care what jack says. hes happy with anything as long as its not bright pink he says XD i bet he still wouldnt be arsed if i did do a room bright pink
i also did an inventory of the stuff that i have brought for future house, as i kept meaning to make a note of stuff i have actually brought. i thought i had more stuff than what i did have so it disheartened me a little bit but i still have plenty of time. havent even found a house yet!
i could jack felt a bit unwanted

then he text me at 12 today
"good job you didnt sleep over last night, i had drunks outside my window til 4am from the pub facing the flat"
i wondered if he would experience some drunks what with the pubs opening up for the first time yesterday. i didnt think the pub facing him tho would be open, it looks knackered.
so i was glad i hadnt slept over as that would have stressed me out
i didnt offer to sleep over today as my car is in for body work tomorrow morning

today i have done yoga and a good walk, spent time with my lad as always
did some drawing, slept and yeah dont know where the day went to be honest
just quite happy in my own little world
mia had rang me saying she was clearing out rob's grandad's house (who died earlier this year) and asked if i wanted any free stuff for future house. so she has kindly robbed me a few pieces from a dead old mans house

tomorrow 
i am going to 2 home stores with mum
she wants bits and i want to buy the shops out XD im going to obviously pick up bits for future house so hopefully I can pick up a few things anyway. not sure what else i will be doing

painting pots

Evening

I slept pretty well
got up at 8am and after breakfast I had the house to myself
so I did 45mins of yoga which i quite enjoyed then I did 15mins of dance after a 10 mins break from yoga it felt good doing a whole hour of exercise
after my shower I had a brew with mum and Oz

I fell asleep after lunch for a quick hour, just wanted to escape feeling
took a lot of pain killers today not because im unbearable pain like i have been from nigel but simply cus i just didnt want to feel anything or think anything
i have had music on all day just so i dont have to listen to thoughts

went for a walk with mum 
then I sat painting my pots, i have finished them they just need varnishing 
then i can put plants in them! mum asked why i was varnishing them and i said its to protect the paint from water so the designs dont ruin.

i havent texted jack much today
i asked him to cancel the viewing we had booked on sunday
simply cus i dont want to live in the house anyway so why bother viewing it really
we havent talked about the weekend but i am unsure if i want to stay over to be honest
i will see how i feel
if i am still in the mood i have been in today and yesterday then i best out the way
i struggled to have him round me yesterday 
just cus i dont want affection and touching
i just dont want to feel for a bit

gonna paint my nails tonight
i plan on doing a mushroom/toad stole design on them

i have been working a bit on my final coaster design
she is coming along well
still got plenty to do tho....

tomorrow, unsure what im doing really

went to have a 2nd viewing

Evening

I slept over at jack's last night
we had gone to view a house near the woods here
we went with my mum and dad and had a look round
we came home and had food then sat down and talked about the house
jack i can tell really likes the house but i just havent had the good feeling about the house
theres a few draw backs on the property that i wouldnt be able to change even if i wanted to
so im not really taken with it
the one next door is for sale and jack has booked to see it on sunday but to be honest i might ask him to cancel it as i cant be bothered to go see it, its the same lay out and same circumstances so i wouldnt be gaining anything by seeing it. just using up energy by going

i showed jack the painting nigel had gifted us
he really liked and said, and i quote "it's weird as fuck"

so i went over to his and i was totally exhausted
i just played on my switch in bed the went to sleep really, i had had enough of it all
its not so much of a big step for jack - he has already moved out
im struggling to cope with a lot of aspects of moving out
i know i want to do it and it will be hard but i want to do this
im just exhausted with it all and it makes it hard to enjoy the experience really

so we got up for school
i forgot to get changed out of my joggers so ended up going to school in my joggers which the dept head noticed XD woops XD i wasnt that bothered to be honest
but school was fine i pretty much just painted all the time i was there
working on display pieces
jack wouldnt shut up talking to people and i just wanted to get home and get dosed up as i just hurt so much for nigel
we got back and he did do lunch for me
i ate it and had enough of listening to jack and theo drone on about games so i went to bed really, jack played games, i wasnt bothered. i got up and had a brew then i was home for 4pm i didnt want to stick around at jacks
i just needed my own space. when im in pain its almost like i can hear extra noise its weird. like just noise in my head from pain so i struggle to cope with everything around me. sure does make thinking extra hard

i got home and sat with Oz
then i planted a plant i brought back from school as i have plans for it ^^
had dinner and then went to paint plant pots in my room
my parents popped out and so i decided to see if i could remember any yosakoi dances from last year as it has indeed been a whole year since i have done any yosakoi! and i could remember a fair bit much to my surprise
now im gonna get Oz and go to bed i have had enough

tomorrow just exercise and art really

First house warming present

Evening

I couldn't sleep so I was downstairs til 1am playing pokemon
i did sleep afterwards tho and dreamed about the grim reaper
interesting dream

this morning i danced for half hour i was soooo sweaty and tired
then i showered and cleaned my room, it just got a dusting really as my room is always tidy
cant sleep in an untidy room
i had lunch and then rested on my bed

jack rang me and said we could go for a 2nd viewing at the house tomorrow at 5pm
so i had to ring my dad to see if he could possibly leave work to look at my potential house
and he actually said he could! my god XD

i went for a walk then i went to Nigel's for the same treatment at 2 weeks ago
cupping, massage, acupuncture
we talked about various things as usual 
and i told him i was viewing houses, he is trying to sell his house, he said if timing works if would happily sell me his furniture as hes going to live on a boat and wont be needing any of it
as i was leaving he said "here is a house warming gift for you and jack" and handed me a painting he did its about A3 and a handmade canvas and its such a weird picture i love it and look at it every time i have treatment and ive even told mum and jack about it about how much i like it. So i was so happy to receive it ^^ my first house warming gift too :D something to remember him by when he goes to live in Belgium on a boat
i will photograph the painting

i came home and felt crippled after nigel's treatment
i looked at my back where i had been cupped and massaged and my god my back is purple thats no lie. i look like ive been in an accident....I had a shower to warm my back muscles up as they felt achy. then i had dinner and did some drawing, working on my final coaster. She's the 6th girl ive drawn but i didnt like 2 i did but this one is coming along well. 

then Oz was having some sort of paddy in his cage, really out of character for him
i think he thought i was going jack's tonight and therefor he thought i wasnt giving him his evening sit on the sofa routine. so i dropped everything i was doing and gave him and early AND longer sit which seemed to appease him.
he doesnt half sulk when i go jacks tho
mum looks after him and lets him out as often as i would but he just wants my company and attention. hopefully i wont be torn between jack and Oz soon and we will all be under one roof!

tomorrow i am taking my car to my dad's garage up the road for the bodywork to be sprayed
as it went through to the metal its important to get it done soon before any rusting can take place. no one is really able to bring me home so i will be walking home which means walking through the country park. which im fine about, the only thing im a lil concerned about is how i will feel tomorrow. last time i went nigels the next day i felt like death. and its a fair walk home i just hope im not as rough as last time.
then i will pick jack up at some point and go with him and dad to view this house
have dinner here then sleep over at jack's as we have school again on thursday

seen 4 houses now

Evening~~

So on friday me and jack went to go view 2 houses
the first one which was down the road from me I could tell from the photos that the house hadnt been updated since the 1970's and I wasnt fussed about it due to it being a lot of work and having a large rear garden and a front garden, i want a simple rear garden and no front garden. We walked round and it felt very much like we had just walked into someone's grandparent's house. It was so old and dated and just needed so much doing to it I felt stressed just thinking about it! The second property was a 5min drive for my house and my god i swear the thing was subsiding!! and the woman refused to compromise she was like "its £210,000 no less" i felt like saying "I wouldnt even pay £190,000 for this place" it was awful. 
So after all of it I felt a bit deflated by it all to be honest not to mention I was tired and in pain. The whole thing is emotional and stressful and therefor taking a toll on my body
We had dinner here then slept at jack's, he didnt do his online gaming and stayed with me.

saturday we left to go view a house near the woods near me
but before i had even driven out of jack's flats crappy car parking i hit the wall in my car!!!!! I have NEVER done anything to my cars and the car thats been my best, my favourite, most expensive, and i hit it!! god i felt sick and it was all i could think about when driving to the house
what was my dad gonna say....
we got to the house and it was all very weird, its certainly a quirky house
its upside down to start with. you enter the house through your landing so your bedrooms are there as you walk in and you go downstairs to the living room and kitchen. your 'drive way' is 2 car parking spaces opposite the property. the garden is tiny and flat ^^ the house is only 16 years old and i can remember being in high school and them being built. it was really clean and tidy and didnt feel like i would have to stress about getting it to a standard. first house i havent felt stressed about what with the work being needed to be done. jack loved it he was well impressed and talked about it allllll day. its at the top end of our budget tho so its gotta be good if we are gonna fork out THAT much
like almost 1/4 million pounds here!!!

we came back to my house after the viewing.
the lady said we were the second couple to view it in 3 weeks....which isnt much at all. so im not stressing about having to make a sudden decision. we want my dad to view it now so i think we are going on saturday to look at it.
who knows, knowing my luck it will be gone by then but she is only doing morning viewings and my dad works and isnt prepared to make time for me >.>

i stayed over at jacks and sunday we went round a few shops
i got new underwear in the sale and finally finally new trainers as mine are so worn they hurt.
we didnt do much all day, harvey came round and we talked houses, he has put a bid in so he is ahead of us! race is on XD
i didnt sleep over at jacks as i felt i wanted to do dancing monday morning so i came home, saw Oz, went for a walk and showered and relaxed with Oz

today i danced for half hour, showered, took my car to dad's garage for a quote, came back went for a walk round the woods with mia and the dogs and showed her where the house was, came back and had lunch. stayed in bed for almost 4 hours as i was done in and needed to tune off from the world i had had a busy week and had enough
then i went for a walk with mum, had food and then did some drawing

tomorrow probably exercise and clean my room then im going nigel's for treatment~

house viewings tomorrow

Evening

I slept!!!
I slept over at jack's late last night and I actually slept through the night
thats the second time since march ^^
my god how much better i feel after sleep
like i can actually function
jack said i looked better today for sleep too

we got up and went to school on the hottest day of the year i swear
like full humidity too, and like everywhere in the UK theres no AC anywhere
so school was roasting - unless you were in the computing suite >.>
lucky gits with their AC
but school went ok really
i wore shorts much to jacks annoyance as he said hes been wanting to wear shorts the whole time hes been at school but ive beaten him to it XD he was fine me wearing shorts as i was only cleaning today i wasnt handling any chemicals, so he sweated it out in jeans
we worked together today which was nice, i was able to clean the prep room so the surfaces are clean at least apart from jack's physics stuff i have no idea where it goes so i couldnt put it away - he can do that. I saw julia and chris and just as we were leaving luke and hannah turned up!!!! i havent seen them since march! i was well happy to see them ^^ luke has sold his house and looking for a house and apparently so is head of physics, weird how 4 of us out of the science group are house hunting

we left there and i went to go get fuel
then went to jacks and had lunch
theo wanted to know if we wanted to go for a walk but we had been sweating it out all morning i didnt fancy getting sweaty again in that heat cus jesus it was hot, jack didnt want to go ether. so we played on switchs on his bed in his cold bedroom
then i fell asleep on him for 45mins

i got home and had a brew with Oz and mum, Oz just fell asleep bless him
then i did a few jobs, had dinner then went for a walk, walked by a house we are viewing on saturday so mum could see it. then we came back and both me and mum were dripping so we had a shower
now im gonna sit with oz and then do my nails later

tomorrow morning i am picking jack up and 10am and at 11am we are viewing a house - one i was originally excited to see but now i have looked at it and seen better so i must say - i aint too arsed about this one but jack says to view it as it gives us more experience with house hunting. 
then we have another house viewing at 4pm one im a bit more interested in but not majorly so
then im having dinner with jack at home then sleeping over at his as we have a house viewing at 10am on saturday morning. probably spending the weekend at his too

here are some things that have arrived in the post recently 
cooler leg compression socks compared to my thick thermal ones, same brand as my thermal ones so they cost £20 each but they are gooooood
face creams i wanted to try
face sheets
and eyebrow bleach