got my bed back

 To say I got my bed back did not mean I slept

I woke up loads from having odd dreams

so I was quite tired today

I had a lonely morning like the good old days but i got on with it just fine.

Oz was snoring next to me so its all good XD

School was easy really as i had a quiet day

i made a class set of this muscle diagram thing made from card. Took me like almost all day would you believe. but last year we needed them and we only had one to show, this year we couldnt even find that one! so a teacher made one to demonstrate with and I asked to borrow it so i could make a class set, only mine was far better looking XD

came home and had a brew with mum oz and jack

then me and jack walked to the shops for some bits for him like fabric cleaner and then walked to the bungalow and dropped the stuff off and measured up a few things. Also a parcel was waiting for me, it was from Tara, a total surprise! She had sent my christmas present too but i put that away. She had sent me a hand made candle she did, a fox candle holder and some treats for Oz, it was so sweet of her, and she sent us a card addressed to the 3 of us X3

we came back here for dinner then jack left to go home to go sort the bungalow out a bit

i decided to look for stuff online and brought him a new curtain pole and curtains for his study which is the next room we are doing up. he needs lighting next but i have ran out of time and i am shattered and it is 9:15pm

i should be in bed!

doctors phone call appointment went ok, hes upped my pain killers much to his disaproval but hey im dying here.

tomorrow is school

jack's at the bungalow = me getting my bed back :D

 Evening

Last night I did try to sleep, Jack had offered to sleep on the sofa but I said it was fine as it was the last night we would have to share a single bed. As i started to drift off to sleep he blurted something out in his sleep, as he fell asleep before me, it made me jump and i wasnt comfy so i got up and had yet another night on that sofa. To be woken up at 7:50am by my dad's mobile blasting out a video as he doesnt adjust his volume so everything, EVERYTHING, is on full blast. It annoys all of us. i could hear my brother banging in his room as his room is above the kitchen - where dad was watching this video. So it woke him up as well. I went to go wake jack up and spent a bit of time laying on the bed with him.

This morning I wanted to go for a walk but no such luck as my parents had other plans

my dad was dragging my brother and jack to make the bed up and do other bits and pieces round the bungalow and i was to go shopping with mum to go get some bits from B&Q and food shopping just so jack as well could have breakfast round the bungalow T^T

we got back and i went to bed feeling exhausted

just as i began to go to sleep, jack rung me T^T does no one want me to rest, seriously!?

he wanted the stuff we had been out for. I almost cried cus i couldnt take much more. mum could see my distress and stopped making mine and jack's soup for the week and took the stuff over so i could go to bed. i woke up at 2pm to find jack home, waiting to have lunch with me. mum offered to make him lunch but he wanted to wait for me. so i had to make both out lunches which was hot cross buns 

then as the sun was still up i said i wanted to go for a walk

and as we were half way round jack's mum txted to say she was 20mins away with his stuff. we were not 20mins away from the bungalow. so jack started to pick up more of a pace. a pace i was struggling to keep up with as i was tired and achy. i told him that his mum can wait 5mins

we got home and loaded the car with stuff to take round to the bungalow, i dropped it all off with jack, his mum no where to be seen as she'd stopped off for a mcdonalds so we hadnt needed to rush afterall. I went straight home before his mum could show up as i didnt want to stand there getting colder by talking.

got home and had a cup of tea with Oz then went for a shower

took my socks off to see my toes were purple and blue they looked like a corpse's toes

really gross

i was ages in the bathroom as it was the most peace i had had in days. no one to disturb me, no one to want anything. god i should have spent my weekend in there if i knew id left alone!

i felt so much better for a shower and had chilled out a bit 

jack was over at the bungalow til 6:30pm as his mum had gone back home and brought him more stuff and its an hour round trip. so he now has all his stuff just not his furniture. mum says "Bet it will look like a bachelor pad round there until you get your stuff in Jo"

he came round and i sat with him whilst he had dinner as i ate mine with my brother

then we laid on the bed. i cried. letting out everything i had held together this weekend. sheer exhaustion. i have no idea how i will get through school like this. i havent rested at all. cus people always want something. but jack is in now. he is still gonna have meals here until we have a freezer and all the means to prepare food. apart from that hes done. he will wait for me.  i cried earlier thinking about moving out and the big change it will be. but he told me not to rush. and my first sleep over at the bungalow is scheduled for this wednesday. as i used to sleep over at jack's flat on wednesday.

hes gonna work out the shower tonight and make the bedding up and hopefully get his ass sorted for tomorrow morning when i got pick him up for school

so tonight i get my single bed back to myself!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i can not frigging wait

i have kicked all his stuff out my room, put my bed against the wall instead of in the middle of the room and i have so much more room its great ^^

i hope he is ok tonight tho. he has no interent til 5th december tho XD

so school tomorrow, should be a quiet day as i dont have a single practical. 

just shattered

doing my nails tonight, something for ME as ive done nothing for myself for days and days now 

i once again forgot to take photos -____- everything is so full on and  go go go that i dont have chance to sit there and appreciate the house never mind photograph it

next weekend hopefully i can

is it all most done yet?

 Evening

So last night me and jack went over to the bungalow for almost 2 hours and returned just before 9pm, we had applied the first coat to the bedroom. I was so shattered

showered and sat with Oz

I tried to sleep but jack soon went to sleep and was heavy breathing, my dad was snoring in the other room and my brother was on his ipad but sounded as if they were all next to me.

I tried to get comfy and felt my back twisting so decided to get up as my back is only just getting better really so i didnt want to twist it again.

i slept downstairs but couldnt get comfy to be honest and so my sleep quality wasnt great but at least I didnt get a twisted back

I got up at 7:45am and got my breakfast all sorted to eat outside when Jack came downstairs he hugged me and apologised as he felt awful knowing i had slept downstairs and offered to sleep downstairs tonight. I said it was fine and just didnt want a twisted back. I still ate outside in the garden it was chilly but i felt i needed the air. Oz was well happy about me being outside, he came running and kept showing off in front of me X3

I cleaned him out and he came to investigate what I was doing.

By 9:20am we were round the bungalow painting, applying the second coat. Which about did me in and then dad came round and did some jobs and we had finished he went B&Q with jack for some new locks for the house, I had come home and crawled to bed. Whilst I had been in bed Jack and dad had been fitting other things round the house such as new lights and things i had ordered online. I thought they were coming home for lunch! so mum took them lunch round, i ate lunch at home then came over to do all the white wood work in the bedroom which truly killed me off. I had had enough T^T

so much has been done to that house its unreal.

whilst i was painting in the bedroom, jack was outside the door in the hall putting up the new lamp shades which were paper lanterns. I chose one bright pink one bright red. Thinking they would add a tinge of colour to the plain light grey walls. nooooo. it made the place look like a brothel i mean we found it funny. but i has got to change it looks awful. the colour and lighting was much much stronger than i thought it would be but we liked the concept. So since then I have ordered a pale purple and pale pink. when they arrive we will put them up. I chose them cus i they would hide the hideous old wire holding the lightbulb up and add a touch of colour. they hide the wire perfectly but yeah need a lighter colour!

but dad goes at 100mph just one thing after a sodding nother. had enough. i keep leaving him with jack as i cant cope hes making my heart beat erratically. Jack copes with him better than me but then dad aso treats jack better than he does me so yeah :/ 

i came home and showered at 4:30pm 

done in

so much for "take it easy this weekend Jo" as numerous people have said to me

how can i take it easy when people want things from me all the time!? whether thats doing stuff, fetching stuff, making decisions, talking about whats next all the damn time! Leave me alone!!!

ive been slopping off to be by myself when ever i can i just need quiet time. i dont even want Jack. i just want peace and quiet. and he keeps finding me, keeps giving me affection. i just want alone time.

tomorrow i hope i dont have to do a damn thing for that house!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

sick of it

think theyre aiming to get jack able to sleep there tomorrow. so i can have my bed back to myself

i have plenty of stuff to order online anyway. so that will eat a lot of my time no doubt

just had enough.

not enjoyed any aspect of moving out so far  

i hope i sleep tonight

i can see myself being on the sofa, despite jack offering to take the sofa i feel bad him doing that.

i must take photos of the house tomorrow!

had the bungalow a week

 Evening

Yesterday I just ran out of everything to give

it was nice to have my bed to myself on wednesday night, I was in bed for 9pm whilst Jack was over wallpapering the bedroom with his mum and step mum, he didnt finish til 10:30pm I didnt even hear him come home I told him to take the sofa so I didnt see him til thursday morning.

School was sooo hard. I had 3 hard practicals and yeah it was just full on really. But I was praised for my hard work. The highlight was head of science bringing in a tray of ringed sprinkled doughnuts *0*

I came home, went to bed, woke up for dinner and said bye to jack who went to paint the ceiling in the bedroom, went to bed, woke up to sit with Oz and stayed up for Jack and we went to bed at 9:30pm I hardly spoke to him. I was so tired, so full of pain killers - mum said my speech was slurred! 

so totally written off day for me, didnt do any exercise, go on my laptop or even use my phone

Didnt want to go school this morning, I was just done with life

I was in a mood all morning just felt tired, in pain and couldnt be bothered with it all

took me 5 hours to start to feel more like myself

i had 2 hard practicals back to back for head of biology and afterwards she actually praised me for my organisation and pracitcals! as I got them right and got them to work ^^

so i felt good that in 1 week I had

head of science praise me

head of biology praise me

a biology teacher tell jack i was doing really well

makes me feel like i can do my job right even if i dont understand the science behind what i am doing

i got home, dosed myself up and sat with Oz and the girls with a brew

and opened up the multiple parcels i received - all house stuff of course

then i have sat for a bit but im about to have dinner then go over to the bungalow to give the bedroom its first coat of paint. i havent seen the living room, kitchen or hall since its been painted so it will be good to see the progress

i cant get over how much has been done to that bungalow in the space of a week as we have had that bungalow exactly 1 week. a lot of hours and efforts has gone into that bungalow.

just tired of it. 

tomorrow probably be painting and putting up stuff in the house

house stuff anyway

but i will have to heal over the weekend otherwise i will be dead for the next week -_____-

we're aiming to get jack in the bungalow on sunday

so i will soon get my bed to myself!

painting begins and stupid fire alarms

 Evening

Didn't sleep great, sharing a single bed sucks. Just waking up all the time cus there is no space. This morning when I woke up at 5:15am my back felt so painful i couldnt wait to get up, I got up at 5:45am my back killed, it was like twisted. It hurt yesterday but today is worse, like another night not sleeping in the right position has just killed it. Hurts from my right shoulder blade, down my right ribs, lower spine. So I tried to help it with hot bags this morning -___-

when I ate breakfast with jack I told him about my back and told him one of us is sleeping on the sofa tonight. He volunteered. But I told him I felt bad making him sleep on the sofa but he insisted. Turns out he is wallpapering tonight, determined to get the job done with his mum so I said that works out well as he doesnt need to worry about getting back late and disturbing me if he stays downstairs tonight, so i am gonna put all his bedding and pyjamas in the living room for him for when he gets in.

So school

I had a practical first thing - a big one

and I decided out of the kindness of my heart that I would totally set the practical up, everything was trayed up into group work. So 10 trays full of all the equipment they would need + on the sides extra equipment such as water baths. It was for Luke and he was very happy with the way I had done it for him and his class ^^ head of science passed the room and I called him to look and I said "look at this! its like a work of art, im well happy with it" he praised me ^^ during me setting all this up, jack found me, he was on the phone to mum as I had left my mobile at home today - woops - he passed the phone to me. It was mum saying that dad's friend who is painting thinks the colours i have chosen look a bit too strong for the room, do I want to proceed? well it was a bit hard not to proceed as I cant go fetch any other colour and to be honest anything would look better than the grubby walls that it was, heck bright pink and lime green would be an improvement! so i told her to to him to just go for it.

2nd period i would have the same practical in the same room - excellent

well it would be excellent if it wasnt for the fact the fire alarm went off....

some nob-head was vaping in the toilets!!

we were stood outside, in the cold, then in sleeted, fire men came, half hour later we were allowed back into the building >.> i was hurting. I had been stood half hour in the cold which is probably the worst thing i can do to myself.

so it took me an hour of recovery, jack found me and made me a hot chocolate and warmed my hot bag up for me, what id do without him ^^ i took double pain killers, something i have never done at school before but i was desperate to feel better. My practical had gone tits up and will need to be repeated on friday T^T

after I felt better I got up and went to remove my practical from the room, upon coming down with the trolly of stuff in the lift i felt suddenly very dizzy and faint. to my luck, a chair was outside the lift, i saw it and sat on it. A TA found me and asked if i was ok, got me some water and a mini chocolate. Then Jack found me - course he did - and took me back to the prep room. honestly, bet he doesnt want to take his eyes off me. 

So I felt crap really but stuck it out and got home

upon going home i found dad was home >.>

him and mum had been round the bungalow and were able to watch the transformation as dad's friend painted. so dad couldnt wait to tell me what he had been doing. all i wanted was a quiet after school brew but i had dad talking about the house. and sometimes i just dont want to talk about the house. im very grateful for all they are doing but sometimes i need a break

I went for a walk with mum and jack had a shower whilst i was gone, we had dinner then my brother kindly drove jack over to the bungalow to paper, i came on my laptop to look at stuff for the house. i know what curtain rods i want i just need to order them and then i have ordered the light fittings for the side walls but no the ceiling in the living room. slowly getting there.

I tell you what i am being in my bed before 9pm tonight I CAN NOT WAIT

is it sad i cant wait for an early bed alone? i told jack that. he didnt look pleased but i told him i have to make the most of it before i have to sleep next to him for the rest of my life XD

tomorrow is school

got a few practicals too >< just hope i can get through the day

Oh and I havent personally seen the paint jobs but mum took photos and i think it looks ok, she said ti does look alright actually and dad even liked it! my god! my parents always hate my colour choices! so i am keen to see it in person!

made sugar mess

 Evening

I woke up a fair bit in the night, so was a bit tired this morning 

we got to school and many of science staff asked us about our bungalow and they had even been talking amongst themselves about it too, as some came up to us and was like "heard about your bungalow!" they were happy for us ^^

I made mess today, making up 5L of sugar solutions, I used the hot plate to heat the water to make is dissolve quicker and i spilt the sugar onto the hot plate then the solution split too, so i had this liquid and sugar crystals burning onto essentially a hot hob! it smelt nice at first, kinda like caramel then turned to burnt smell XD I spilt solution where i was working too, honestly i couldnt havent made more mess if i had tried! I put it down to tiredness

I did other stuff and got the day done but i was bloody done i tell you!

got home and was ready for a brew and pain killers

found out mum and dad had been at the bungalow today ^^ helping out which i appreciated very much

after dinner i took jack over to the bungalow as his mum and step dad were coming over to help wallpaper, i was going to measure stuff cus you know - i have more stuff to buy! and as i spent 5-10mins looking for the tape measure i was using i gave in and rang home. dad had pocketed the tape measure -_____- i was peeved but im only a 1min drive away so its not all bad. i went home, grabbed it, came back and measured up. jack's parents turned up and i stayed for a few mins talking to them then went home to order. and been here ever since. i have more bits to order but dont want to order before i have confirmed a few things with jack so i will show him tomorrow as i imagine he will get back late. no rush anyway.

it will come together i am sure

we got stuff in the post today such as bedroom curtains and curtain pole and cutlery organiser so i can wash my cutlery now and take that over.

mum says she will just keep popping over when she has time, shes so good to me

tomorrow just another school day then anytime left goes to house i suppose :/

slept on the sofa

 Evening

I was so done last night

Jack didnt get home til 10:15pm

He needed to shower, so as soon as he came home I sent him to shower, baring in mind everyone was thinking of going to bed and he had the shower on. I was stressed with everything, I was at my limit and had enough. He came out the shower and joined me in bed but was very fidgety due to him doing a physical and mental activity of hanging wallpaper half hour previous, so he was fidgeting, my dad was snoring, my brother was playing his ipad in his room.

my limit was met

i grabbed my stuff and took it downstairs.

left it on the sofa and went for a wee, i came out the toilet and found jack in the living room

i was like "what you doing here?"

jack "i came to see if you were ok"

"yes I am fine I just need to be alone, im sleeping on the sofa"

"thats not fair on you tho, you will ache, I will sleep on the sofa"

"no jack just go away I am sleeping here"

and he left. I felt a bit awful but I just needed to be alone, i was in the quiet and had more space on the sofa than on my bed with jack

I woke up to the sound of the printer my dad turned on at 6:50am --_______--

I went to see mum at 7am and told her i slept downstairs and I did sleep but had a stiff back

I went to see jack and he wondered if i was cross at him, i wasnt and gave him cuddles. we got up and had breakfast

signed into the online meeting in our pyjamas and when that had finished we went to the bank so i could transfer jack money. then we went to pick up yet more paint. came back to the bungalow to find chris had just pulled up to have a look round the house and gave his opinion on stuff which was nice of him. and as luck would have it our bed was delievered whilst chris was there so he was able to help jack shove it into the spare room until we are ready for it

I took jack home and we had some lunch, i took him back over to the bungalow with the microwave as i thought i could take some stuff over slowly. stuff that wont get in the way whilst decorating and cleaning kinda thing. his mum came over and helped him lay more wallpaper and he came home at 6pm for dinner, then went over with dad to do some odd jobs then home again for the evening

his mum is coming over again at 6;30pm tomorrow to help with wallpaper so it will be another late night no doubt which i am not happy about due to having school in the morning but i cant turn the help away. just gotta get through it.

i have just slept and took it easy today, and done some display work really

tomorrow is school

i hope i sleep and i can get through a boring day at school ><