secret presents

 Evening

Yesterday I worked from home and we did my appraisal and mum came over for a walk, a walk I was reluctant to do as it meant day 3 of walking whilst it was snowing! it absolutely came down as well, i felt like it was aiming for my face I literally couldnt see! so i was cold and aching and had enough, the sun came out as we were on our way home -_____-

In the evening I had a bath and fell asleep on my bed woke up at 9pm >< and got Oz out of course

This morning I got up for a bath before school, i hurt. my joints hurt and its from walking in the cold and snow. I dont want to do it anymore! we dropped Oz off at mum's

school I was grouchy just cus i was grouchy, especially when i realised I had left my sketchbook and paints at home!! so i had to go and rob stuff from the art department and luckily i did get what i needed but i still prefer my own stuff

I basically sat all day painting a volcano! easy day, it does feel a bit pointless at times but yeah its easy enough.

after school we went farmfoods which basically sells frozen food, we didnt get much and what we did get was for jack

I dropped him off with the goods, got changed and went to mums for a brew and Oz

I did half hour of yoga as well whilst Oz snored on the sofa

I came back and did dinner which was stew I put on in the morning

then we took our separate ways. as its our anniversary on tuesday and as there is literally nothing we can do i suggested we both by something in secret, something we can do together - sex toys not qualifying.  I have gone with a board game I know i can play as  i know jack enjoys board games but i refuse to play them with him as he takes it too seriously as is just far superior at them than me. I have picked Triominoes 

now gonna have Oz out and such

tomorrow working from home really

got given my book from school which classes as training as you cant go anywhere for training so they ordered me a book and i might read some of that!

Oz inside yesterday morning enjoying his morning carrot with us, usually he has it in the garage or shed at mums

yet more snow

 Evening

I slept pretty well and got up to work from home but noticed it had snowed a lot in the night

so of course I go out in the snow 10mins with Oz who always gets very giddy in the snow, its very cute to watch, i love being outside with him. But i was getting cold so came inside

we had a lot of faith meeting  this morning.....suppose that goes with the territory of working in a catholic school. but my god it was awful. such warped individuals.....so my godliness it was so irritating.

and one speaker even had a monotone....felt quite annoyed by the end of it. But chilled out with lunch and derry girls.

after lunch I went for a walk with mia, in the snow. so cold and buy the end of it my voice sounded like an old womans voice. glad I saw her tho. I was just bloody exhausted afterwards. she kindly brought me some converse! 

I rested when I got in with Jack and Oz as my god I needed to thaw out...

when i got up we were gonna have a bath then do dinner. But that didnt go to plan as i started the bath running but didnt put the plug in....i even looked at it thinking it was taking a while to fill up! the whole house's hot water quite literally went down the drain....I was peed off by this

so we had dinner and i chilled out

Jack went to game with harvey and theo and looked at clothes online then I sat with Oz for a bit

now its 9pm and I should go for a bath soon really

tomorrow just working from home really. 

My Last Year in my 20's

 Evening

Today I turned 29! My last year of being in my 20's!

getting old huh XD

Yesterday Tara popped over with my present and just stood at my front door talking for a few minutes as you know you cant invite people in, but its been a whole year since I have seen her face so I was over joyed to actually see her, plus it was a total surprise appearance too

Yesterday night we did our weekly food shop so we wouldnt have to go on my birthday, I did some dancing in the morning and after my throat felt constricted. I worked on my dressing table some more

Today tho

I woke up and saw my Oz, I let him out for a stretch then brought him in to open presents with us. He was going mad with all the paper and boxes! It was really cute to watch

I got some really nice gift from people, Jack got me a bunny scarf, cacti candles, bath bombs

we decided to go for a walk, we went to some woods which is kinda pathed so we werent walking through endless mud. we did get snowed on tho! so it was really quite bitter and cold. From there we went a bit further to the farm I got Oz from, they didnt have any hamsters but Jack said he would buy Oz a toy so I chose this really lovely rabbit print tube. Its staying in the living room for a while ^^

we started to make our way back and called into a garden centre that mum had told me has hamsters and indeed saw the hamster. The woman let us view them through the glass, poor things had their bedding removed just so we could see them. It felt cruel. We did reserve one in a way as we told the woman we would be back after we had made the cage up. But it was odd, even the tho they were obviously very very cute at just 5 weeks old, i didnt feel that nervous excitement i get when picking out a new bunny or guinea. I wasnt sure if it was just because I havent been feeling myself or if it truly was because I am not that bothered about owning one. I love Oz so much I almost feel a bit traitorous to get a hamster...Jack however seemed much more up for it than me and was a bit disappointed we didnt get a hammy. I said I would think about it.

we came home and made lunch I had a salad for a change. Karen came and popped her gift to me. I havent seen her since summer. When she had grown her hair back but now she has nothing again...it was so sad to see as she did look poorly with her cancer. and bless her she didnt need to get me anything i was just happy to see her. and she needs to rest! but thats karen, always putting others first before herself.

after lunch I made my soup, cleaned Oz out as I know he enjoys it and that makes me happy.

I had a rest as I was in pain from walking in the cold and I was just tired.

I woke up and had Ozwald in for a stretch and to see his new tube which he loved ^^

then we went to mum's were I had my treat of the day - a real cup of tea!! none of this bloody fruit tea rubbish >.> 

she gave me my gifts, mum really spoiled me!

she made us all dinner, and I made some biscuits for me to eat, we had a sit with the pigs as well.

then we have just come home, I will sit with Oz, then bath then watch Inuyasha and go bed

its been a pretty alright day really, its a winter lockdown, not a lot you can do!

got to make the most of being in my 20s!

I am very grateful for everyone making time for me today tho and yesterday ^^

i really did get some lovely things, people know me well

next birthday is my brother's 26th!

Tomorrow is a load of meetings online -______- then should be seeing mia for a dog walk in the after noon some time.

Last Scientist Done!

 Evening

Last night was 'date night' but we didnt get up to much as literally what can you get up!? its winter and lockdown. We ended up watching 3 episodes of inuyasha and called it a night

I didnt sleep that well ether so I felt quite tired this morning

but got up as I had a science department meeting that I felt I best attend as it looks bad if jack is there and I am not. But it was boring and not useful to us technicians

I went for a walk with Mia which was nice but tiring, the dogs were cute. But walt did poo whilst farting. It smelt and sounded disgusting. We both laughed in the end tho. And this is why you dont have dogs... She said she will see me monday and give me my present then, when we go for a dog walk.

She told me her 94 year old grandad, whilst recovering from a stroke, had covid...

he had no symptoms...he was fine. HOW THE HELL DOES THAT WORK!?

her mum said "will nothing kill that man off!?" XD

I got back and mum called in as she was 7 doors down so called in for a tea

then I had a bath and lunch and a sleep and saw Oz and painted my dressing table

then spent this evening working and finally got my last scientist finished!

Fritz Haber!

so hopefully tomorrow I can put the school display up!

Mum kindly made me some pancakes today, which are safe for me to eat! I ate some but gonna have the rest now at 10pm woo

she says she will make me some more, but at least I have something semi-nice to eat on my birthday

she said she found of from matt theres this massive allergy test you can have done to see what you can eat what you cant digest. its like £350 and in another town but shes gonna get more info on it and says i should do it if we can find out enough about it. cant imagine not having stomach issues.

tomorrow

is school -______- but last day this week!

2.5kg

 Evening

Didn't sleep that well, before bed I had that thing were I think I am gonna be sick so ran to the kitchen sink then cus it didnt come out that end it came out the other -_____- when I went to be I had stomach pains and during the night stomach pains. How unfair is that!? I am on this diet and this is what I get, to say i was annoyed is an understatement.

This morning I had a bath before work and Jack drove us to work

work was ok, I managed to keep myself busy at the desk the whole day with display stuff, I did managed to get away during their P.E. lesson so I started doing the display on the wall its self

We took another covid test and both of us were negative. I thought I had done it wrong as it was too easy but no, I had done it right. Surprised me.

At the end of the school day we picked up a blind for the bathroom and went to mum's for a tea. Sat with Oz. Mum had been over to my house during the day as she had no electric or water for a while as matt was doing the bathroom so she came to use my facilities XD she did clean the living room in return ^^ Oz has had a nice day bless him. I decided to weigh myself as its been a week since I was first weighed and I have lost 2.45kg! this diet works for weight loss I give you that! So hungry all the time ><

We came home with Oz and we went for a walk but got caught in the rain but I was ok, it wasnt freezing out luckily. when we got home we decided to take a bath to warm up, I had sweated a lot at school and I was quite damp from the rain. I feel better for a bath. Now we are gonna have the stew I put on this morning. Not sure what it will be like as it's my first stew and I cant put gravy or corn flour in it cus of my diet. It will feed us anyway!

Rest of the evening will be easy and just the two of us, as its wednesday which is Jo's night ^^ I get jack's attention all night XD nah it's our 'date night' but obviously dates dont exist right now!

tomorrow just working for home but hopefully can see mia for a walk

heres the title for the display im currently doing

Our Bathroom

 Evening

I slept really well after watching an episode of Inuyasha with Jack, he finished gaming with Theo and Harvey for 10pm ^^

My alarm went off at 7:20am, think I mumbled out "let Oz out" and went to sleep. Next thing I knew it was 8:30am!!!! Jack had kindly let Oz out for me ^^

As soon as I had breakfast I was cutting up raw pork for this evening, doesnt phase me

This morning I worked on my display picture and did some chores round the house, cus I need breaks from sitting down.

My mum came over to see me/us in the afternoon and had a brew with us :)

I took her home tho as she walked over and it decided to chuck it down. As it was 4:30pm I suggested taking Oz over too as we would be taking him over in the morning for bunny daycare anyway so he has gone over, mum had cleaned his cage out so hes got fresh cage.

But I always miss him when he's not here!

So when I got back I did dinner as I was hungry T^T sick of being hungry and never full for long. Carbs really do work ><

After dinner I told jack he could go game with harvey and theo if he wanted to. I have a headache and just feel like monging out so I have just been quiet and doing a bit of painting here and there just between coats drying kinda thing. Gonna eat my treat of a pomegranate whilst Oz isnt here. He gets disappointed when I eat something he doesnt like, so usually I eat orange at night with him, Oz does not like Pomegranate.

think jack is coming off his game at 10pm so we can watch inuyasha together and go to bed.

as tomorrow it is school. jack has campaigned against school/head teacher saying he will not be 'babysitting' the children. So he is coming into school same days as me but whereas I am 'babysitting' he will be doing technician jobs. He offered to campaign on my behalf so I wouldnt have to babysit again but I told him I was fine and didnt want to pee off the headteacher...its one of things i got upset over the other day as it stressed me out. I have no clue what I will do during lesson tomorrow tho :/ but I get a covid test should I want one.

so yeah thats tomorrow,  i will be putting a stew on in the morning which I will be totally winging as I have never made a stew before and I havent looked at any recipes ether!

Oh and here is our bathroom, finished in all it's glory. It is bloody glorious as well, LOVE IT!

sadness, 1.1kg, hamster

 Evening

I am back

after a few emotional and somewhat i guess depressing days

just havent been myself at all and have cried a fair amount too

ok truth is i have been crying so much my skin on my face was sore and my eyes stung and even after sleeping my eye lids were still red and puffy. Thats how much i have cried -_____-

I am not even sure what I have been so upset about. I have just been really...sad I guess :/

Just like a dark cloud swallows you up sometimes. I fall victim to it and cant get out of it. I feel next to nothing apart from sadness. My love for Jack disappears. Its so bazaar. The human mind is strange. I think I just close off from everyone. My love for Oz never changes tho.

Not much happened over the weekend, apart from my family coming to see the bathroom which they liked. and got a few jobs done. About it.

Yesterday I felt more myself and got more done and even went out side for a walk

Today I woke up and really had that monday feeling

I feel kinda ok, no where near as bad as I what I was feeling

i guess being on this diet doesnt help! Since wednesday I have lost 1.1kg! thats quick weight loss huh

I am eating constantly!

Today we got the bathroom finished as we needed to paint the ceiling and jack helped me with that

so its finished and I plan to take the photos tomorrow!

I saw my mum for a walk

made lamb mince burgers for dinner which jack appreciated ^^ i have been doing really well with my cooking and I never look at recipes ether 

Tonight Jack is gaming, he hasnt been gaming much as he has been practically babysitting me in my fragile like state...think he dare not leave me unsupervise. yes things were that bad

Tomorrow

just working from home really

might do some dancing or go for a walk

its less than a week until my birthday

people keep asking "what you gonna do for you birthday?"

well its winter and we're in lockdown ^^; I would LOVE to go for a walk in the woods but its all weather dependant isnt it.

then people ask me "anything you would like for your birthday?"

I HAVENT GOT A CLUE!!!! 

Jack has been toying with the idea of getting me a hamster, something to keep me occupied in the evenings XD and to give me some happiness but my mum think it is a bad idea and will give me more to do and stress over. I am in two minds, I think I have Oz who I dearly love but sometimes he is busy or needs to go home, I have enough in my life, but then a hamster is easy and I love them they are very cute and I feel it would make me happy. Just I would need Jack to pitch in a bit as Oz is mine and MY responsibility so to give me two pets seems a bit much but then my friends have had or got dogs! And a hamster is loads easy compared to dogs! I dont know I am still thinking. They are cute and I have a cage. I feel if i get one my mum will disapprove even tho she doesnt live here XD