last night was a real bad night, its been a while since
i slept that bad, just laying there thinking "im gonna get up in a minute"
i dont tho cus i hold onto the belief that i will go asleep eventually!
think ive had 3-4 hours sleep
so i was determined not to sleep during the day today!
I started sewing more of mum's present
and here we have pinky and popuri
all pigs have been sewn, they need eyes and mouth next
and then they need turning into wall hangings so id say im just
over half way in finishing them
i got my brother's present finished so thats a good job done
daren't photograph it as he will probably come across it and i want
it to be a surprise :3
I have had awful awful stomach ache today
i mean my stomach hasnt been my friend for 2 weeks now
just everytime i eat it hurts! but even more so the past few days
and today it kills i havent been eating a lot past few days
and this morning's "breakfast" was a hot chocolate :/
after lunch which i ate a slice of bread with some cheese on
me and mum popped out to the shops
we went £1 shop, the range, and a new pet shop
i didnt get much, vaseline from £1shop it makes your lips red :D
christmas paper for presents, buttons that were reduced to 75p bargin!
and some carrot shaped buttons reduced to £1 and a present for tiffin for xmas
i havent seen this toy before i think it must be new, and when it said "dream catcher"
i was sold, i mean how cute is that ^^ it was £3.99 in the range and £4.99 in the pet shop
i got it from the range ;) so I will wrap it up for him, its his 2nd christmas as I got him
16th december last year but feels much longer than that!
ive done a lil dancing but not had the energy or alone time to record
i dont feel i could dance my heart out with the stomach ache i have right now >.>
best be gone tomorrow i wanna eat damn it!
Actually one thing that made my heart sink today was
i was in the living room with my mum and brother
i pulled up my jogging bottoms to show my knee caps
as i have been working on making them smoother :) so i thought id show mum
my progress, my brother came out with "jeez how skinny are your legs!?"
i looked at him and looked back at my leg and grabbing the meat on it
and i said "theyre not look at this" and later it made me think
"what if they are thin? what if i cant see that? anorexics lose their perception on reality"
it scared me but i think im looking to far into it, not that my head shuts up
i just dont want to be mentally ill well more so anyway
not sure how tomorrow will pan out~
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