I didn't sleep well
man im getting fed up of writing that!
I woke up at 12:30am and felt sick, not as sick as yesterday night tho
but still sick enough to need anti-sickness tablet
and I came back to bed at 2am after cereal and hot chocolate
I read til 2:30ish and fell asleep to only keep waking up
and mum woke me at 7:45am as I had a doctors appt
I saw my useless GP
honestly he does anything but help
be different if it was his hundred kids that were sick
anyway I asked him if he had received a letter from the pain clinic as I hadnt
but he had lucky
I said it should mention about changing my antidepressant but only if it is ok
with the GP and my psychologist
he just said to me "its fine by me" and wrote me a prescription and just like that I had
swapped an important medication to me and he hadnt even bothered to think about
the psychologist, i thought it was gonna be a weird experience for health care
professionals to actually communicate with one another
guess i was right!
Then he said I could only take these tablets if I reduced my current anti-depressiant
i said that I was currently taking the lowest dose possible - he didnt know this
he said I would also need to reduce my pain killers, and I have I have gone from 8 a day to 2 a day- once again he didnt know this. and i was keen to point out that I had done all this work off my own back no thanks to any professional
I asked him for some sleeping tablets
he wasnt keen and asked why i needed them and i told him id only slept through the night 3 times since last April but he said to me "yes but i dont want you to get addicted"
so i played my trump card, i brought out my pocket the sleeping tablets he'd prescribed me several years ago and passed it to him i said
"you gave me those years ago, i never finished them and theyre out of date now, hows that for addiction" he relented and prescribed me just 10 sleeping tablets (generous huh!)
i felt saying to him "if i was effing addicted would i be trying to come off medication by myself!"
he just doesnt want to help
i dont think he realises just how crap i feel every day of my life and i turn to my GP for help and relief and all he can think about is money and how he deems me not worthy of treatment
sickening
i felt like id literally had to beg for help
but none the less i came out with everything i needed
i will ween off my current antidepressiant this week then switch to my new one
it takes a month to kick in and by which time i should be seeing my psychologist so at least i guess i can tell him how its been going.
so tonight i have a sleeping tablet!!!
oh my god i have a high chance of sleeping!!!
im gonna do everything possible to promote good sleep
it will leave me with a rank taste in my mouth all day and make me drowsy in the morning
but hopefully it will be worth it
as im shattered!
after id been doctors i waited for mum to sort stuff out and i checked my emails
turns out that all the bunny questioning my cousin has been asking me this week
has led to her getting her first pet which is a black bunbun!
very happy for her it should do her some good
im not keen on his name Revio or something like that
We set off to the other side of the city for some retail therapy mum said XD
we first went for lunch and we shared a sausage and bacon panini with a brew
then we hit the shops!
mum got everything she needed
i got:
pair of black joggers £6
thermal lined tights £3
lilac lace top £6
cream wool cardigan £10
a kitty t-shirt £1.50
when i got home i realised that the t-shirt, which i had found in the sale part for £1.50 was actually a childrens, it fits totally fine. yeah its only for age 9....seriously -____-
mum says i have a children's body T^T
after shopping we head home and saw to the pets
i keep fussing Ozwald when ever i get the chance
I went on my laptop for a bit and ordered a few bits online
then I made mum a mother's day card as thats in a couple of weeks
luckily I already have stuff for her just needed a card
my brothers birthday on wednesday
might do a quick bit of dancing
then Ozwald sitting, then my nails and bed
god I pray i sleep please please please sleep
this is literally like the final thing i can try
i still feel pretty good from nigel's treatment
i hope it lasts this way
tomorrow i am seeing adam i believe
He brought me this the other week and one for himself
its basically the exact same game i had on gameboy but i can play it on my 3DS
i started with Chikorita but ive barely played it as ive been wanting to finish Okamiden
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