stupid fireworks

 Evening

I slept pretty well in fact i looked at the time this morning thinking it was gonna be 3am and i could stay longer in bed but it was like 5:50am! so i got up

All day i have felt sickly anxious like when youre gonna do an exam

i got the day done at school some how but i kept stopping as my heart was going erratic and what with running around with a mask on, it was making me feel quite dizzy and faint. a few times i felt like if something was to go wrong or someone have a go at me id literally cry. very much at breaking point. my heart goes out of rhythm a lot today, mostly when I think about the house!

im just having an off day im sure

i spoke to chris and he says he has a whole week off work and nothing to do and its literally as we get the keys he has a weeks so hes kindly offered his amazing DIY and electrical skills to the bungalow and to be honest he looks more excited about doing it up than i do! and he knows how to do sooo much as hes done it all before. i hope he can help but i also dont expect it.

I got home after work feeling knackered 

it hurt to walk and joints hurt a lot so i knew i was gonna be doing yoga tonight and not a walk so after a sit with a brew i did 45mins of yoga and felt a bit better for it, helped with dinner but ended up getting Oz and the girls in half way through our dinner as the fireworks out side had reached a loud and stupid point and they dont like the noise so they came in

and its 8pm and Oz his laying under my bed, well happy, and also hot. hes been running around upstairs that much that hes made himself rather warm! but he total forgets about the fireworks when he comes in my room he loves it so much, just cus its such a rare treat for him. literally only bring him in bonfire night and the weekend it is close to as thats the worse for fireworks. keeps it a treat for him something special and distracting 

tomorrow it is friday thank bloody god

dont know how i am gonna get through the following weeks

8 days til i am a house owner.....