Done my back in

 Evening

I managed to learn a 3min dance in 15 mins last night ^^ of course it wasn't learnt brilliantly but hey I still got it at least ;D

I had a bath and watched anime with Jack we are enjoying Chobits

I slept well, woke up at 7am but thought "forget that" heard Jack get up for Oz tho and come back to bed and the next thing I knew it was 9am!

This morning felt like my birthday, I had fruit loaf!!!!! My first carbs in months! It tasted so damn good, I had it with a cup of tea and sat with the massager as my back hurt from laying on the grass for 4 hours.

At 10am we planned our day and decided what needed to be done in the way of sorting things for carpets. So I went to go clean Oz out then would come in to do my soup

I saw Oz and went to lift his cage roof off and at that moment I felt something snap and tear round where my bra sits 

I SCREAMED

I can't remember the last time I screamed in pain. I ran inside the house holding each side of my self screaming like a crazed person

I laid out on the lounge floor screaming and crying my eyes out and not being able to breathe properly as it hurt to breathe.

Poor Jack was sat on the toilet during this >< don't think he could get off the toilet fast enough!

he ran into me not knowing what happened

I could barely breathe nevermind speak

I didnt know what to do, what position to be in

just didnt know how to make this terrible sharp pain go away

it hurt the whole circumference of where my bra sits and if I moved it shot pains down my front or up my back I didnt know what to do. I couldnt stop crying but jack managed to calm me enough to find out what happened.

He didnt know what to do and nether did I

so we did what any other adult would do....

we rang my mum X3

mum was in a super market with dad and I told her what happened and she said she would come over but to put ice on it til then

so jack had the job of slightly moving me to slide a bag of peas under me.

it was hell, jack brought me my ipod and i put that on whilst he got dressed and did his teeth as he didnt want my parents thinking he was slobXD

mum came and dad was there and they said i needed to sit up. 

but everytime I moved too much I yelled out. I have never known pain like it. my back had gone into spasm basically and mum said i needed to move it around so the spasm will calm down 

dad - helpful as  ever - said "if you cant get up we will ring an ambulance"....

i mean thats helpful. He knows I dont do hospitals and on top of that theres a thing called Covid, I dont wanna be in hospital with covid sitting beside me

dad asked me how I got from the garage to the house

and I replied "I ran but dont remember it much"

so my brain thought "it is possible to move then if I did that"

so we tried a new approach of being pulled up with my arms to sit up and it hurt a lot and I had to get my breath but it was easier to breathe. Next step was leaning on the sofa cushion and kneeling on the floor. Mum rubbed a pain killer cream into my back and said I just need to move it slowly.

eventually we got me into the sofa. I was exhausted by this point. I had cried so much and been in horrific pain. Im good with pain, but pain that is so strong that you cant use your lungs properly...thats impressive.

Mum said "its fear and scary and not knowing what to do isnt it"

both mum and dad have had spasm in the back so knew what to do

i think its from laying on the grass yesterday

mum and dad left me to recover

eventually i was up and moving and found it less painful to be moving around

Jack helped me with my soup, I supervised him cleaning Oz out as hes never done it before

as soon as I had lunch I went to bed for an hour

since then I supervised Jack nailing down some floorboards and moving stuff for carpets tomorrow

he didnt want me doing anything, and I dont think I could have as even tho I could move my back continued to twinge with pain that would last a second.

He didnt mind cleaning Oz out tho and Oz inspected it ^^

mum came over for a 4pm brew which I was happy about. I am so grateful to her for today

I did dinner whilst Jack gamed, food was good

after I ordered my new desk! I am not doing any exercise tonight as I actually feel unwell so I am not going to push my body any further

were gonna have a bath and sit with Oz and have an early night. jack says I look like im gonna collapse and look like death 

tomorrow

NEW CARPETS!!!!! I can not wait, its not starting til the afternoon tho so not sure how I will pass my morning.

just hope my back is back to normal tomorrow as its all very sore and tender