couldnt remember how much id taken ^^;

 Evening

I was by myself last night which I told Jack - several times - its fine

and it was 

But I didnt count on aching as much as I did

and I took extra pain killers and tried to sleep

I heard someone say - a mans voice - "are you ok?" so that made my heart hammer, obviously no one was there I do just hear things on the odd occasion 

it was 1:30am when I looked the time and i was like "man" T^T

next thing I knew I could hear footsteps outside at the side of the house, I think I must have been asleep about half hour, so I was half asleep listening thinking "just what is jack doing?"

then when I woke up a bit more I could hear Jack was actually in the bathroom

but I could also hear these footsteps outside, so I laid and listened

then outside wasnt going on so I was like "just what the hell!?"

when Jack came out the bathroom did I notice for the first time that those footsteps sounds were actually a very odd popping noise my stomach was making. it was a very odd sound. I was still like half asleep

I could feel my heart hammering tho. When Jack climbed into bed I told him I was awake

he asked if I was ok and it was like 2am

I said "no my stomach doesnt sound right, my heart is hammering and i feel sick and not well"

he asked "how much have you had"

and when I thought about it

i didnt know

I actually couldnt remember how much I had taken from 9pm onwards....

so of course this panicked him. He tried not to panic but i could tell he was worried

he offered to get up with me and make me some fruit loaf as usually eating helps

I had earlier at 9pm a milk hot chocolate and at 11ish I had a biscuit

so I had had something

we got up and he turned the lights on and was like "jesus Jo you dont look good"

I looked at myself and I looked like a druggy, I just looked awful

he made me fruit loaf and we were up til 3am til I felt a bit better and he said I looked better but blamed it all on his self

i said "how is this your fault!?" he said "cus I wasnt around to see you take drugs, I wasnt around to make you fruit loaf"

not his fault. I wasnt self inflicting myself or anything I just was getting desperate as nothing was working and kinda forgot how many drugs I had taken ><

safe to say he's decided not to game tonight XD

so we went to bed at 3am and he fell asleep like instantly

and was snoring

I still couldnt sleep so I got up, went on my laptop, pinned some fabric, was up til 4:30am anyway

I had set an alarm for 8am as I needed to get up for food shop

So I did get some sleep, and even managed to have a dream

we got the food shop done but I felt a bit rough round the shop

we got back and had a cup of tea then I went to bed for 90mins

I got up we had lunch then I went over to mum's for a bit to see her and her freshly bathed sows then I came in at 3pm finally got to do some sewing.

did some dinner which was salad. salad that was obviously cold. cold food gives me stomach ache

how can i forget!? so i had stomach pains for a while

I could not be arsed to do a work out but did about 25mins of weights

had a bath now I am gonna watch anime and have hot chocolate and play pokemon in bed ^^

tomorrow

just got a massage at 4pm so I plan on doing some yoga before then

I also would like to do some sewing as I hardly did any today probably less than an hour