before after

 Evening

We were up til almost midnight because of me. I hurt. As usual. So Jack came to bed at almost 11pm after gaming and then had to deal with me -______-

I got up at 8am after having a dream about raiding a werewolf monster lair and finding myself at a spooky house belonging to a vampire and then the vampire wanted to marry me and wouldnt let me go. Like something out of a teen novel isnt it XD Jack didnt get up til 10am

By which I had got ready, cleaned Oz out and cleaned the bathroom. I hadnt really bothered with breakfast. I wasnt hungry and I couldnt be bothered to make myself anything ether. Once Jack was up I went back to bed. I felt so done with life. Really couldnt do life today.

I got up and had a BIG lunch to make up for my lack of breakfast. But it did nothing. No energy still. I tried to draw. but it was all just an effort. I went back to bed.

I got up and had a cup of tea with Jack who has gamed all day really. I managed to sit and do some drawing, Oz picked my spirits up. I wanted him earlier but he was so content in his fresh hutch I didnt want to bother him. I googled my house and the photos are still online from when we bought it and me and Jack were having a flick through as the house and garden looks totally different we have done SO much. Honestly. It boosted my mood. I can tell my depression is ruling life right now.

Here is our new front door too~

I made biscuits and now Im doing dinner

I say dinner, I told Jack I dont want to sit and eat a meal. I just cant face it. I am also not in the mood to cook. I know he would have cooked if I had asked him but I just want any of it tonight. So I have whacked a pizza in the oven for him and Im gonna have a warm cookie and milk hot chocolate as its better than nothing and will hopefully give me a sugar boost.

After dinner we are going to go and do our food shop for the week. Then have baths.

Im not sure if I will do any exercise tonight or not but I would like to do my nails.

tomorrow

Mia is coming over at some time in the morning. And at some time in the morning Jack is going over to his mums and then theyre taking him down to birmingham to have a buffet with his nan and his cousins family. I was obviously invited but I am no way up to that. Not only do have zero energy right now to look happy for people and make conversation, I cant sit in the car for that long then sit uncomfortably at his nans house for hours and hours. Cus yeah he wont be home til like gone 9pm probably!

so its day by myself really tomorrow but I am fine about that and I dont want Jack to miss out on family time cus of me.