Yet another uncurable illness diagnosed to me

 Evening

or morning? its 1am anyway

I dont sleep properly since the procedure. That camera ruined my life

anyway this week~

I can no believe that the first week of my easter holidays has passed me by!!! T^T

anyway, monday I saw Mia, we went for a good hours dog walk. It was nice to catch up with her. I was quite tired afterwards and  my aches were still bad from doing that stupid run on friday. I came home, had a quick brew then went to mum's and had lunch with her. Giving jack some time to himself.

Tuesday, jack still continued to do the odd hour each day weeding the garden. I can't remember what I did 

Wednesday we went to a couple of garden centres with mum to pick some plants for the garden, it was a bit rainy that day tho and everything was outside so we got a a bit cold and damp

thursday I got my diagnosis from the gastro doctor. God I was on the phone for 2 mins. It was awful Couldnt care less for what I was trying to tell him, how my life has been ruined by that camera. He just said that all the samples that were sent off came back fine - so no stomach cancer for me, I have a VERY sensitive stomach - I could have told him that. He gave me the diagnosis I did not want....IBS. To me IBS is when a doctor gets negative results and can't be bothered to do anymore investigations. Done sorted, you're fine, its just irritable bowel syndrome, get on with life. I did not want this diagnosis as it is not curable, you can have it for life, and I feel fobbed off. Dont get me wrong I am sure there are people who genuinely suffer with this, I just feel I have something more up with me than this.

He told me to go on the FODMAP diet. Which to be honest is very very similar to what i am on now - the paleo diet. He didnt want to prescribe any medication to me as i am already on such a cocktail of drugs which he said isnt helping my stomach any. So that was that. I feel like I had that life ruining procedure for nothing.

friday, I did some FODMAP research to see what I can and cant eat. Like I said its  very similar to what I am doing now. The only things I am gonna have to cut out is onion, sausage, mushroom and garlic. The rest I can ether eat or I dont actually want to eat. So my diet wont change much apart from those 4 foods really. So thats not too bad. I am also permitted to eat some foods that I couldnt before such as rice.

mum had been over to help Jack with the gardening. It looks so much better already!!! she brought the girls over which was nice, I was working on the things I have been sewing for mum all week. She wanted a little baby blanket for the girls to sit on, and also 2 guinea pigs -  one each. So she now has the best guinea pig bags I have ever made! Theyre cute, sturdy and well padded. Mum was very pleased with them

saturday, we did our food shop, I came home and went to bed I was exhausted as I still dont sleep. Even tho its the holidays I still dont sleep. Stomach likes to keep me up.

I had lunch and stuff with jack and cleaned loaf out, did some more on the picture I am working on and then we went to Jack's family's house. His nan was there which was nice. we had home made scones, a mini egg cookie and they gave us easter gifts which was nice  of them.

we came home at 4pm and had an early bath. I pitched the idea to Jack to scrap dinner, have the remaining 4 scones his mum gave to us, a hot cross bun we bought in the morning and anything else we want. He agreed. So we had a sweet dinner! it was well good! we dont usually scrap dinner and eat bad, so when we do it, it feels more forbidden! I then did 40mins of yoga

tomorrow, or today whatever,  I have my cooking to do in the morning, I have the bathroom to clean that I didnt do saturday and at some point we having home made cake at mums. I might take Oz over as our easter bunbun.

mum hasnt bought us anything for easter, she asked if we wanted anything and I said no. I have Oz, he is the best easter gift of all. My own easter bunbun. so she said she would just make a cake to celebrate

i will be starting the FODMAP diet this week, however there will be occasions that I will be breaking my diet as it is the holidays and I have plans and treats to have and do which I deserve. when I go back to school on 17th I imagine I will be fully on the diet. so its a nice break into it, not that its much different

i have been working on my dragon picture, its looking ok

I have got my kanji books now so I can hopefully get going with all that now!

Jack has been enjoying animal crossing still, and today I had to order him amebo cards as he wants to complete his bun island. He wants a  remaining 3 bunnies to join the island. 

I shall enjoy my last week off~ more plans this week

monday - clean the house as its bank holiday so everywhere will be busy and also weather suppose to be awful

tuesday - suppose to be meeting up with lizi

wednesday - blood test TT^TT

thursday - free of plans so depending on how I feel, I may pop out somewhere with Jack

Friday - massage and jack has a night out with the lads

could I be anymore stupider!?

 I totally forgot to do this yesterday!

I remembered at some point but then it left my head

Well I can confirm I am on easter holidays now!!! woohoo!!!

So last week

My Jack was still poorly. Sunday he was doing well but then come later afternoon he went downhill again so we came to the conclusion that he couldnt go to work on monday. So I was going into work early again

He returned Tuesday and I worked from home, I wasnt going to but Id had a bad night and was massively exhausted from picking up jack's slack. 

Wednesday we were reunited at work again~ But god Jack was drained. He was still recovering and looked like death bless him. The whole week was a slog for him. Thursday night I couldnt sleep so I did 2 hours of work in the night so I could go home early Friday. Friday I aimed to get a load of stuff done before I went home, but I didnt happen as people kept coming to chat to me T^T I was trying to get crap done before easter damn it ><

but god were we all massively burnt out at the end of term

friday night I did something  VERY stupid, so very very stupid.

Jack was gaming with his friends, and Lizi told me the other day she had gone for a jog. I honestly felt quite envious of this act. So whilst Jack was gaming I had the thought "can I still run?" when I was 24/25 I got good and running but gave it up due to my joints saying NO MORE. but god did I love running. It wasnt fair. another thing my illnesses rob from me.

so I snuck out, didnt tell anyone, no phone, no inhaler

could I be anymore stupid!?

I was gone 20mins and it was hard work but it was nice

however

HOWEVER

I started to not be able to breathe....I am asthmatic 

why on earth did I think going for a walk in the damn cold evening by myself without a phone or inhaler was a good idea!!!!???

I kept running, finding my breathing sounded god awful. Like proper gasping for breath and not in a fitness way. More in a "my airways are closing up" way. I kept going thinking "ill be fine ill be fine" but then I found myself going light headed and dizzy (turns out this was due to lack of oxygen to my brain, who'da thought) so I did walk for 30 seconds then continue on.

I got home in one piece, Jack unaware of what stupidness Id been up to

the bath I had run before I left was waiting for me along side a cold drink

it took AGES for my breathing to sound like a normal human being again. Like I had caught my breath but my breathing was awful.

in the morning I felt like road kill. Jesus christ did i HURT and its monday and I still HURT!!!!

I knew that Jack would pick up on me being in more pain than usual and extra stiffness when walking so I decided to confess thy sins~

he was not happy. no not happy indeed ><" Jack doesnt get angry. He just silently seethes. and he was very quiet ^^"

He told me it was a very stupid thing to do, I could have died (over reaction me thinks), to never do it again, if I did it again he would be very angry with me, why dont I take asthma seriously, next time he games hes gonna lock me in the house XD 

saturday and sunday we decided to just rest. We of course did our chores but on the whole we did just take it easy.

I told mum that I ran and she couldnt believe that I did what I did

yeah I do a lot of stupid things >.>

Today is monday and this morning I went to meet mia for a dog walk for an hour

I came home and threw my sweaty body in the shower, put the dinner in slow cooker, had a quick brew then went to mum's to have my lunch

so Jack had rest bite from me for a bit today. He was doing chores and some gardening with Oz

then the rest of the day I coloured in and took breaks. I hadnt got to cook or exercise as Id done it all! so that was nice

tomorrow

Jack has his first physio appointment so I said Id go with him as he doesnt know where hes going. then we're going pudding pantry, then were going to pick up some stuff at shops like cosmetics and home cleaning stuff, nothing amazing

I dont have any other plans this week

I have plenty to do tho!