Evening~
I slept so bad last night, i was having nightmares
i had the usual one i have the paralyzed dream as i call it, luckily what woke me was mum
shouting out in her own nightmare!
then I had a creepy one
I followed a boy into a classroom full of people my age all on tables of their own
laying on the left sides, i think the guy leading it was doing stretches with us
i layed down but soon shouted out that i had pins and needles in my face
the girl opposite with black hair was smirking to herself
then my whole left body had pins and needles so i shouted and guy came over
he couldnt fix it and i was like paralyzed
so he put a big pile of beads down on the table in front of my face he places
a hand over the beads and one over my face and said some werid language
the beads heated up and i could feel the heat on my face from them
it still didnt free me, so the girl with the black hair got up and came behind me
saying "your doing it wrong" she the pulled my hair to one side gently revealing my neck
then she bent down to my and began to say something
thats when i woke bolt upright in bed, as it felt like she was really there
and i was laying on my left side and my hair was back
so odd and creeped the hell out of me, i actually felt cold after that
it was like that girl was death
so i stayed awake for a bit before i decided it was safe to try and sleep again
i woke at 9:30am =.=
me and mum decided to have a day in as its stupid black friday
everywhere goes crazy
so i decided to research something called Adoptables
my cousin had adopted a character yesterday to which i did not understand why
i didnt understand the concept
so i looked into it
and for those who dont know what it is, its basically you make a character up
just by drawing it, you can make up its age, background story etc
then sell it 0.0
not as a piece of work, but the character. you buy and random person's random character
its crazy, so then your free to use the character in any way you want
but that means you ether drawing the character again or just copying and pasting it everywhere
i personally do not get it, not unless you see a character thats perfect to advertise your business or something, but apart from that i just dont get the use and point of it all
so i decided seeing as a lot of adoptables sell on deviantart and i have an account
that i would make and sell my own adoptables
so im only trying this the once unless its mega successful (highly doubt it!!!!)
so im drawing a pair of twins, one boy, one girl
and just let the bidding start
i can not see them even selling, but you never know
ive seen some sell and im like "seriously!?" so i thought id give it a go
this is how far i am, the boy on the left and the girl is trying to take his cookie away
i was gonna do xmas cards today but was not in the mood
so thats tomorrow's job
me and mum sat and watched "Super Vet" we missed wednesday night
cus of yoga, i played on pokemon whilst watching it
afterwards we went for 45min walk, came home and had an earl grey brew
so it was a nice quiet afternoon just the two of us
i booked an appt to see a course adviser next week at a college on wednesday
tomorrow i plan on bathing the pigs as they smell
and maybe do some more drawing and xmas cards~
im so tired >< i have dancing to do but i'll see
oh and im still dying of stomach ache
i didnt even finish my bowl of porridge this morning without running to the loo
doing my head in!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Konbanwa~
The miracles of sleeping pills~
I decided to take one last night
and I slept all the way through the night!!!!
first time in weeks X3
yoga was great last night we did the crab or wheel as she calls it
i could do it but i put that down to my youth
some people did it but not all, my goal is the splits!!!!
Today I had treatment at 9:30am and I needed it
but my stomach had other ideas
so i was left alone with the pigs and had to out the house for 9:25
my stomach wanted to be in the bathroom so thats were i was
its so annoying as i thought "i'll only have a hot chocolate this morning
that way i wont be on the toilet" but nope my plan didnt work
so i got there a few minutes late
i didnt even get time to spend with millie and alice T^T
karen noticed my stomach was really bad when doing reflex
and i could feel my stomach and hear it when she was working on the area
all the time praying it would heal after karen works her magic
and safe to say since ive been to karen i havent been dying on the toilet!!
so fingers crossed ^^
i got back and danced a bit ready for tomorrow
i took photos of ed's CD clock i made
last night i painted the hands as there were black and didnt stand out much
so there blue with white flecks dont know why i did it this colour but hey
hope he likes it ^^
i fell asleep for an hour i always sleep after reflex for some reason
and i cant remember what else i did really :/
tomorrow im suppose to start my work exp but the head teacher let me know
that the year 6 teacher im suppose to be working with is sick
so they have got a supply teacher in and she doesnt want my first day to
be with a supply teacher and nether do i!
but that means its another week gone by
so tomorrow i am going to ring up a college and ask for a guidance interview thing
my plan being that, if i get all the knowledge i need for the course, then if i decide
that i do want to be a teaching assistant i can easily enrole for the new year as i will
know what i have got to do. instead of it all being a last minute rush
thats the plan anyway!
i sorted out books on my kindle today
i was impressed that i was able to work technology XD
i also painted eyes on mums guinea present
tomorrow is black stinkin' friday so me and mum
are safely staying home tomorrow!
Evening all~
I slept better last night but had a strange dream
well strange being that i dreamed about a dress and dancing
it was like a werid take on a disney princess film
I dreamed that i was in a class of girls and the guys watched us
ice skate and picked which one they wanted to take to the dance/ball
i thought "sod it im enjoying myself on ice skates" and the head master picked me
gulp
but it did mean that i got the best dress compared to the other girls
it was like £3000! the other girls were dead jealous
but i was more nervous than anything
and the night before we had to leave our dresses at the hall so no one would
forget theirs. I hadnt realized that whilst i had innocently left mine there
the girls stretched the hell out of my dress
so when it came to the dance/ball i went to put my £3000 dress on and it slipped
straight down, it was stretched out of shape and too big
so i panicked big style that i had a big scary head master waiting without a partner
so i rummaged in a random costume box and found.....a snow white costume =.=
oh yeh i had hit the big time, i tried it on. and opened the hall doors
and thats when i woke up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i would have loved to have seen everyone's faces walking in wearing that!
nevermind
i had a dream them about playing ice hockey
two dreams about being on ice maybe i was cold in the night?
anyway so when i was up i was dying of stomach ache and that was before breakfast
i managed some porrage, which ended me. that was it. in a ball on the floor dying
what the hell is wrong with my stomach as of late!?
safe to say i got to know the toilet on first name basis today
jesus
i weighed myself actually as i havent done in a long while
and i had lost a lil not much but i guess its down to an empty stomach
after the porrage pain subsided i did a tiny bit of dancing simply so i could
get something recorded for my channel
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zbLl-VBIMeU
almost got 50 subscribers! a lot quicker than i had expected!
me and mum had a quick bite to eat and made sure i wasnt dying before
we popped out mainly round charity shops ^^
got a candle holder for my advent candle, and the 2nd bridget jones diary for 50p!
thats saturday night entertainment in the bag XD
and i got a car smelly think that was all i got
when i got home da postman had been and delivered
my clock making kit, gundan dvd (so stuff all set to make ed's clock), charms
for dom's bag charm and my 1999 digimon toy
so i put it on my bag with my 1999 pikachu!
i call it my "retro bag" XD i loved gabumon and pikachu X3
came home and mummy kindly dyed my hair for me
she suggested it so i took her up on the offer
so now its shiny! bit darker but it will lighten up in a few days
when some dye has washed out
its my usual and i love how soft my hair is!
yep no make up or anything as usual XD
tonight im going yoga!
tomorrow I have treatment and thank bloody god too
GooD EveninG~
last night was a real bad night, its been a while since
i slept that bad, just laying there thinking "im gonna get up in a minute"
i dont tho cus i hold onto the belief that i will go asleep eventually!
think ive had 3-4 hours sleep
so i was determined not to sleep during the day today!
I started sewing more of mum's present
and here we have pinky and popuri
all pigs have been sewn, they need eyes and mouth next
and then they need turning into wall hangings so id say im just
over half way in finishing them
i got my brother's present finished so thats a good job done
daren't photograph it as he will probably come across it and i want
it to be a surprise :3
I have had awful awful stomach ache today
i mean my stomach hasnt been my friend for 2 weeks now
just everytime i eat it hurts! but even more so the past few days
and today it kills i havent been eating a lot past few days
and this morning's "breakfast" was a hot chocolate :/
after lunch which i ate a slice of bread with some cheese on
me and mum popped out to the shops
we went £1 shop, the range, and a new pet shop
i didnt get much, vaseline from £1shop it makes your lips red :D
christmas paper for presents, buttons that were reduced to 75p bargin!
and some carrot shaped buttons reduced to £1 and a present for tiffin for xmas
i havent seen this toy before i think it must be new, and when it said "dream catcher"
i was sold, i mean how cute is that ^^ it was £3.99 in the range and £4.99 in the pet shop
i got it from the range ;) so I will wrap it up for him, its his 2nd christmas as I got him
16th december last year but feels much longer than that!
ive done a lil dancing but not had the energy or alone time to record
i dont feel i could dance my heart out with the stomach ache i have right now >.>
best be gone tomorrow i wanna eat damn it!
Actually one thing that made my heart sink today was
i was in the living room with my mum and brother
i pulled up my jogging bottoms to show my knee caps
as i have been working on making them smoother :) so i thought id show mum
my progress, my brother came out with "jeez how skinny are your legs!?"
i looked at him and looked back at my leg and grabbing the meat on it
and i said "theyre not look at this" and later it made me think
"what if they are thin? what if i cant see that? anorexics lose their perception on reality"
it scared me but i think im looking to far into it, not that my head shuts up
i just dont want to be mentally ill well more so anyway
not sure how tomorrow will pan out~
Oha~
I woke up feeling a bit like death but by the time i had
some meds i felt human again XD
I got started with mum's present as she went out to work
so i stitched millie and alice
and lily and hazel
I made a start on pinky and popu but i ran out of time
also i made a good dent in making my brothers present also :D
so i feel like i achieved something with my day
but i soon started to flag a bit
but before i went for a quick sleep i decided to tidy my room ^^
and paint my nails
my room was desperate for a polish, having central heating on makes more dust!
and my nails look like a 2 year old did them and that was by daylight!
im better at 9pm by the light of the TV!!! how!?
so im gonna re-do them before work exp on friday
so yeh fell asleep to wake up and find it dark ._.
i had to go get the pet toys in from outside and lock tiffin up
and wait for my parents to come home
i didnt go for a walk as i quite easily talked myself out it
i need to do it tomorrow tho!
so yeh a mundane day really
i hope to do some more sewing tomorrow and some more exercise
i did dance last night and did pretty well ^^
but one very important thing happened at the weekend
my mum brought me....
a....
advent candle!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YES
i have been wanting one for the last 3 years
1st year - couldnt find any
2nd year - found one for £10+!!! (aint paying that for a candle)
3rd year - found on AFTER christmas =.=
so yeh im mega happy it was only £2.40 as well but its also the
prettiest i have ever seen :D its so decorative
well happy
i'll photograph it on the 1st december
which very scarily isnt far away!
Konbanwa~
once again I didnt sleep through the night =.=
its very annoying
i woke up wondering how the pets found their first night
in the shed, well its millie & alice's first time anyway
they were fine~
i felt crummy this morning bit like i have a cold
but its not a full blown cold. yet....
i sat and read and finished my book T^T so i brought the next one ;)
went online and was looking at disks i could use to make
Ed's christmas present. took me ages til i got bored and just decided on one
i was being too indecisive ><
I managed to work one mum's present a bit
i millie sewn up and shaded with eye shadow
same for alice but need to get rid of the cottons yet
theyre not finished as they need eyes and noses!
and here is dom's bag charm so far
all thats on it is a bow tie i made and a star
im gonna add a tardis, scarf and a clock
i didnt go for a walk as it was freezing and i was nakerd
i actually went to bed for an hour and when i woke mum came in
and offered to get me drink but i told her if she does that then
i wont get up! i was very happy there but i hate being lazy!
not that i had the strength to do much else ><
tomorrow I plan to work more on mum's present seeing as
she will be out a few hours
i really must do some form of exercise tonight!
