Evening
Another wasted day of my life sick
so fed up -_____-
I had yet another dream about granny
whats with all the granny dreams lately!?
I also had a dream I had to give birth!? I cried so much cus i was scared
nothing happened i wasnt in labour or anything just frightened about giving life
weird
I lazed round this morning
had a look online for christmas crafts to make
but nothing shot to mind really
12:30pm i decided to WALK to karens
which on a healthy day is a decent feat for me
I took my phone
1pm was my appointment and i got there on time ^^
i enjoyed the fresh air but my god at arriving at her house my legs
were like jelly i txted mum to say 'your gonna have to pick me up later. sorry!'
so i had my treatment and it was good to talk to karen
then mum picked me up :)
i felt bad dragging her out the house when she feels like crap
but there was no way i could drag my corpse home
i got home and went to bed for an or so
since then i have drawn really
started on digimon - mimi
she's coming along alright actually~
see what tomorrow brings
Evening
I had a bad dream involving my granny
about her being taken away from me. from us
i woke up and felt really frustrated for some reason
i wanted to cry. i wanted to punch the pillow. i wanted mum to wake up so i could tell her.
mostly i wanted granny back.
but i know death doesnt work that way
I woke up at 9am
walked into my parents room to find mum laying on her bed in pajamas
so i looked at her, looked at the clock yep 9am and looked back to her
eh?
"are you alright?"
"youve given me your cold"
-_____- so now mum is poorly which isnt like her. her immune system is really good
so she didnt go to work. normally shes leaving at 9am
so it was just us two today dying round the house
very boring and dull
we've had the pets to cheer us up like
but tonight i managed to eat my dinner
and then i came over all fainty and dizzy so i went to bed
and i was there 2 hours i just felt utterly wiped out
ive done nothing all day and even slept through the day
surely im suppose to be improving?
fed up of this >.>
tomorrow i have Karen
might try and attempt to clean my room
i ordered some nail tape the other day for 99p
just so i can do some different nail designs really
i just wanted a go ^^
have to find some form of happiness how ever small at the moment
but something did make me smile last night
helina has invited me over thursday to do her hair and make-up
for a work do she got to attend. i always say to her
"if you ever need a hand im only next door" so yay i was happy
cus she sucks at that kinda thing and i enjoy it
so im looking forward to that :D
Evening
What a crummy day
a day I was suppose to spend with friends T^T
but no use moaning i guess~
I slept pretty bad I had a nightmare
which woke me at 4pm
not wanting to return to the nightmare i started to read
then i ached all over and couldnt sleep til 6:45am
then I woke up it was 8am
so at least i managed to get another hour in.
I helped sort out the roof/loft today
dad was intent on getting rid of stuff
and i had to tell him what was going and where to find it
it exhausted me actually as i was helping bring stuff down too
later he went to the tip and me and mum went food shopping
i felt i needed to get out even if it was just a supermarket run
it made me real tired
i got home had some soup and went to bed for almost 4 hours
i just couldnt see the point in getting up really
since then ive drawn
read with the pets
and entertained tiffin XD
might try and dance later to help my muscles
i contacted Nienke to tell her to tell school when she goes in tomorrow
that im not coming in
im not gonna be able to manage a full day at this rate
and besides ive done my hours and im not getting paid so im not worried about
not attending. but i thought if i get her to tell them then i dont have to wake up
early just to phone in sick.
The guy who lives on my street who i used to play fight with. well i was dying to
ask him if he remembers. and each time i saw him i chickened out
i sent him a friend request on facebook
he accepted it....
i sent him a message
im waiting for him to respond
but mum and dad walked round the block today and saw him talking to one of dad's friends
and mum spoke to him...mum has guts but i dont -_____-
maybe we will speak one day who knows!
this came in the post yesterday
Terriermon plush!!!!!
I was happy he came safely
he was £2.45 which I thought was really good - well they're sold out anyway
i couldnt resist him! I wish I had renamon and guilmon too but i couldnt find them online
but terriermon is cute enough
he is hanging next to my pillow ^^
I bet he wouldnt be too difficult to make as a plushie
