Konbanwa~~
Last night I dosed myself up on herbal relaxants and
a sleeping tablet at 9pm and was in bed for 9:15pm
I woke once to adjust my blanket but apart from that I bloody slept!
I slept!! my god its a real privilege to be able to stay in my bed all night
and the night went so fast as well! I forget what a 'normal' night's sleep
feels like to have!
Upon waking up this morning i felt like I could have slept through til lunch
But I got up at 8am and went for a shower to wake myself up
got ready to see mia
my girls had been fine as well ^^
Mia picked me up at 9:45am
she always looks pretty
we went to the city centre and did her bank business then shopped
but didnt shop OTT like she usually does
I picked up more hot chocolate and a birthday card for dad
usually I make my cards but he doesnt appreciate home made stuff so I dont
waste my time and effort and simply buy him one
we went to lunch in Cafe nero cus she likes that place
I had pasta and she had a panini
and we shared a piece of banana cake but i didnt enjoy it so i let
her eat the majority of it
then we set off for the car
I felt like I wanted to look round more places but I was tired and knew she had stuff
to this afternoon
she came over to my house and I showed her the canvas I had painted
she really liked it
it's Pokemon Crystal Battle scene (2001) I think it looks alright
its on a canvas 18"x18"
she stayed for a brew and then headed off food shopping
I felt drained I seriously felt knocked out and achy
I crawled up on my bed knowing i shouldnt but all well
I fell asleep for an hour could have had longer
I got up and edited the photos for ebay
just got to write up the details then its sorted ready for wednesday woo
I need to do my nails tonight but so far I dont have any inspiration for them
tomorrow I am going with Mum to a Sound Bath that Nigel
has organised there will be 12 other people there and its for like an hour and a half
I have never experienced such a thing but Nigel recommended it to me
not seeing adam hes got a job interview and doesnt want to see me XD
Konbanwa~~~
Well last night my 3 girls shared a hutch
we made sure there was plenty of hay practically everywhere
in case one was left out or something
but I had feeling they'd be fine
My night sucked big time honestly
I was up at 11:30 aching and took 2 pain killers
did some dance and yoga and played pokemon then went to bed at 1am
not wanting a late night
by 1:45am I was up taking 2 more pain killers I was in agony
it was like screaming at me I didnt know what to do with myself
I went to bed at 2:30am and fell asleep but woke up a few times cold
When I woke this morning I had fallen asleep in my dressing gown under a blanket
safe to say my body was wet with sweat
I was pale, clammy and had bags under my eyes
mum said I looked like id been smoking weed in the night
she said i looked like a drug addict and I imagine i probably did!
i had technically overdosed in the night
I felt rough but got on with my morning
I sat with my 3 girls who were all fine, no one had cuts or chewed ears
just look at em
I took a photo of them today
alice always looks peed off in every photo you take of her XD
I took a load of photos for ebay
that took me a while and I photographed my pokemon canvas which will hopefully
be up on tomorrows diary
I had lunch with mummy and we sat outside having a brew watching the girls eat grass
we went for a walk near the river then came home
i was sorted a few things out on my laptop
i brought a new skirt reduced from £35 to £10! its Bodyline so its fantastic quality
Later I painted the base of a canvas for my next art instalment
i tried to draw out nail art for this week but wasnt feeling it
adam came over and i was on my sewing machine fixing a couple of things that had holes
he was a total git saying i had a hole in my leggings and i went to grab my butt
saying "where!?" he just laughed. idiot.
he stayed for a couple of hours and we had a brew outside but Oz didnt join us like he joined me and mum earlier. he was on paint bucket
well this weekend they maybe coming out the shed so he will have to part with the paint bucket
we booked bowling and pub for monday night! woohoo!
me and mum dropped him off and went to yoga
the woman who made sexual noises was there again this week
we were laughing and dreading it
but she never made a sound....strange
not complaining tho!
i got very cold in yoga which i dont usually but i lost feeling in my nose and toes!
tomorrow Mia has asked me if I want to go to the city centre with her
she needs to do something in her bank and then she can shop
we are gonna have lunch together
should be nice~
im gonna take a sleeping tablet tonight
which means everything will taste fowl tomorrow and i will be a lil drowsy
but mia is driving so im covered there
i just cant do another long night alone. i cant. i will break.
Evening~~
I went to bed at 10:30pm
woke up at 11:20pm
takes the pee
whats the point in that tiny bit of sleep!?
im so god damn tired I think Im due a sleeping tablet or something
I can't bare another night alone
I was up then til 2:30am
I got my canvas finished the so I can start whenever I like on the tree painting
I woke up at 10am but I can't say I felt better for the lay in
This morning I had the girls to clean out
and the played together outside whilst i cleaned out and there was no issues
I had Oz watching them X3
Then I suggested to mum that seeing as it was a nice clean cage what about seeing
what maisy thought about going in Millie and Alice's cage?
she was prepared to try it
someone told me that if theyre together in a cage for more than half hour without
fighting then you should be fine
so I sat and sat in my pajamas just watching them
of course they were all very wary as it was different for them but nothing kicked off
if its gonna kick off its alice that starts it
and maisy twice took food from alice's mouth! alice did nothing so i took this as a good sign
if nothing else maisy has serious balls for doing that!
I left them and we checked them every 10 minutes
later we got them outside and they played well and were fine going home
we brought them INSIDE and it kicked off a little bit for some strange reason
but it soon calmed down
and now at 9pm we have left them for the night in the same cage!!!
i cant believe this could be it we might have been able to put them together
after all this time i mean jeez i pray that i dont come to a blood bath in the morning
and all has been well
they seemed fine and all in their own spots when i put Oz to bed
We cant move them from the shed til maisy is in that hutch because her hutch is unfit for being outside in the elements it would be cruel and it was cruel of her previous owners to just leave her in that battered old hutch.
so they could be a trio! we've never had a trio set before always singles and doubles
I didnt do much this morning as there wasnt any morning left after id attended to my girls
after lunch i had psychology he looked at the pictures i draw of my dreams and feelings
we talked about them for the entire session he was surprised at my drawing talent
i never think that theyre amazing or want to show off i just do them
im seeing him again on 20th april next time we're talking about 'family'
I came home and had a brew then went to adams at 4pm
we sat on his bed talking as i was stressed
basically ive felt crap about myself all day weight wise i could starve myself easily
but i know i wouldnt get away with it
unfortunately
i was tired and achy from nigel and i know adam wanted to go out for food tonight
i told him i didnt want to he later told me his dad had already prepared dinner just like mum had but id told mum i was home for dinner so basically i had food adam did not
i felt rotten but he seemed fine about ordering pizza he never orders pizza with me >3>
so i pouted and wanted to stay for pizza but i knew id have to go home and wind down til like 3am til i could sleep and i was already stressing about the night
so i came up with an genius plan of instead of going pub for the sake of going out
that we would on monday - a week after our anniversary - we would go bowling, go out for food and then have a sleep over! perfect. i felt much better about it all
I came home for dinner and had Oz and the girls out
Oz was feral again
tomorrow I plan to sort ebay stuff out and then Im seeing adam then Yoga
god i cant take much more of these crappy nights
Evening~~~
I didn't sleep well
in fact it took the right royal pee
I went to bed at 10:30pm and woke up at 11:50pm
thats gotta be a new record or something >.>
from there I got up for pain killers and I played pokemon
but the pain was like screaming at me
I needed something to take my mind off it so I painted for an hour
my brother found me at 1:30am painting and sat talked to me
he doesnt go to bed til late most nights by choice hes a night owl
I got a lot of my painting done and its looking good :D
I have done a lot of art lately
here is a picture I drew the other day the Kanji is 'fear'
I went to bed at 3am and had disturbed sleep from there til 8:15am
when mum woke me for Nigel's
I went to Nigel's house and I had my treatment
he didnt let me see his dog as she'd been in the park and was rather smelly and dirty XD
as long as shes happy im fine with it
from there i went straight over to adam's house and had a brew then a bath
then we went to my house so i could let the pigs have a trot together and they behaved well
they havent seen each other for 2 days so i needed to keep it up
then we went into a town for food and we played a game of pool i found it hilarious as the table clearly wasnt level and the balls kept rolling down XD
we walked round a few charity shops
got back to his house and had a brew whilst it slung it down outside
it was rumbling with thunder and everything out there!
then stopped and sun came out which is how its been all day today
typical british weather
we went out to the shops when the sun was out for ice cream
oh and i gave adam the card id made he loved it and he said he'd ordered me something online
his dad liked the card also~
i came home exhausted i just was dead literally and was falling asleep
after my dinner but mum woke me up said id had half hour and Oz was wondering where i was
he was feral i dont know if its a full moon but jeez i couldnt cope with him!
i had a shower and just sat doing my diary with a face sheet on
tomorrow adam is on about wanting to go out for dinner
im not a fan of eating out
i do it cus its usually the person im with who wants to eat out
its a pain!
i have got my 3rd psychology session after 7 weeks to attend as well at 2;30
so i will probably see adam after then maybe as
for going out for food we shall see
we did go in a travel agents today for some brouchers to flick through
i cant say im arsed where i go just as long as its nice and got a pool
Evening~~
Me and Adam have made it together officially for 1 whole year!
a whole year together without killing one another XD
I can not believe it's been a whole year!
Seriously I've had my first boyfriend and relationship for a year!
I need an award XD I always thought my first relationship would
be over in a month cus i get bored and annoyed easily at times
or the other person wouldnt be able to handle me xD
adam seems to take my life in stride really easily and is very accepting
of it all he never has a go at me or anything and therefor doesnt
stress me out or makes me pull myself to pieces
we balance each other quite nicely
I wonder if we can make it to next year :D I hope so
its been sad I havent been able to see him as he's had a 13 hour
shift to do and its double pay so I totally understand him working it
its just said i cant see him at all as I made him a card
the front says "sometimes I wonder how you put up with me"
then the inside says "then i remember I put up with you so we're even" i need to write the inside of the card yet.
thought it was very much our relationship humour
it took a few hours so i hope he likes it
hopefully i can give it him tomorrow
I also finished this today just so I could at least upload this for him to see
I have done loads of art work lately
im enjoying it i must say
anyway today it is bank holiday and as i predicted on my earlier diary
i said it would rain today and i was right! stopped raining about 3pm
nice horrible day
I didnt sleep well
i had to take and pick up my brother from a bus stop i picked him up at 11:30pm
so by night standards thats no late and i didnt mind
my mum just commented how good our relationship is as some siblings couldnt
give two craps about one another
i wouldnt be without my brother ^^
I went to bed at 1am
woke up at 3am for pain killers and went to bed at 4am woke up at 7am fell asleep til 9:30am
its just broken sleep all the damn time
this morning i had to have Oz inside as it was throwing it down out there
he was giddy about it all and very sweet i thought he'd be annoyed at me for getting him out late
i did some of the drawing i was working on
in the afternoon i fell asleep as my eyes were stinging me
speaking of stinging me my face hurts and is sore all because i wore a little bit of make up
yesterday. its very sad and annoying that im having to be mega careful what i use on my skin
i think cus its not getting that healing time during the night as your body and skin heals between 10pm and 2am and im usually up then. so my skin is mega sensitive.
ive been ordering make up with skin properties in so it doesnt offend my skin too badly
but i made the decision that no make up now til 14th which is the wedding im going too
as i dont want dry scaly skin for that!
i watched a few youtube videos with Ozwald and I went for a 45min walk by myself
as i felt i had to get out the house seeing as i didnt exercise much yesterday
i did do a lil dancing but its nothing compared to fresh air
i made the decision that im gonna flog some stuff on ebay after the easter holidays
or during just depends on when i list the stuff as i have a fair bit now
i want to make a new hoodie/jacket also!
i have plans!
tomorrow I have got Nigel at 9:30am
mum and I think I need to see a nurse or doctor as ive got an infected toe nail on my little toe since friday and its not healing its just weeping and pussing constantly and very painful
sucks being me at times
and then i hope to see adam as he has to make up for working on our anniversary XD
Evening~
Happy Easter!
Before I crack on with day first I will share my night
I went to bed at 1am then I laid there for some hours and
i worked out that between my disturbed sleep that I only got 4-5 hours sleep
woo -____-
anyway today is easter and I made a fuss of Ozwald
I got ready to go to adams house
he wasnt expecting me but I knew he was home
I got Oz packaged up and ready to go
so I turned up on his door step with our very own residential easter bunny
although he was a very lazy bunbun
the journey to adams he was laid out in his basket whilst i drove...
the entire time at adams he was laid out in front of adam whilst
adam stroked him so lazy he did nothing
some easter bunny!
I took him home and went home for lunch also
After lunch I went back up to adams house
we played pokemon for a bit then had a brew with Oreos
and some cake as well ^^
I did his mum's nails she was pleased with them
We went upstairs I had a brief play fight but all today i keep sweating
literally go boiling hot and i sweat to pieces so i had to stop cus i was gonna strip
off if i carried on
then played Okami for the last hour
I love Okami
I came home and mum had done us a roast dinner for a change
it was great
then I have danced
yes danced!
i havent been dancing lately ether cus im to knackered or simply just aint feeling it
ive got 4 dances on the go
I did some painting as well
my pokemon painting is looking sick
tomorrow is mine and adams 1st anniversary!
but he has decided to go to work and do a 13 hour shift...
so i aint seeing him :(
ive never had an anniversary and now i dont even get to see him!
but its double pay so I dont blame him I just said he will have to make it up to me
Ive made him a card and everything so I wanted him to have it
I guess I can give it him another day
I think I will just do some painting tomorrow and please myself as everyone else
has already got plans
anyway my easter photos to share
heres me and my easter bunny
the chocolate mum brought me i LOVE milky bar white chocolate
even if it is childish i dont care
and finally my nails cute huh
Evening~~
I was up til 1am just aching and wanting to die
had enough
i read manga tho
I want to get through my series of Nura rise of the yokai
I havent read it all the way through
I woke up at 6am and drifted back to sleep til 8am
my sleep way disrupted through the night as i was bloody freezing
This morning I found it hard to motivate myself
I went to go see Oz to say "we've been together a whole year!"
but sadly he wanted nothing to do with me -___-
all day ive tried to see him and all day hes blanked me...
getting blanked by my rabbit on a special day sucks
he's with me now tho hes by my feet XD
I wasn't able to take a photo of the pair of us cus i couldnt even stroke him
let alone pick him up!!
I will get him tomorrow i hope!
anyway here is photos of my lovely little boy throughout this last year with him
He is very dear to me and to me and my family we feel we've had him much
longer than just a year
he has settled in so well, quickly and perfectly
its been such a pleasure to have him in my life
i would say his only "bad" quality to him is that he is very very untidy!
but thats nothing compared to his many good qualities
hes loving, he loves the pigs, gentle, has no aggression, playful, likes treats, not fussy with food
hes so lovely and i am very lucky to have him
i hope we have many more years together!
I didnt do much all sodding day
ive been in a bit of a daze really
I was suppose to see adam today as i do every single saturday
he didnt text me last night
and i just felt a bit unwanted, which is rather needy of me i will admit
today i txt him saying i wasnt coming over and he was like "oh ok then"
dont think he was expecting me not to come over
although he had not invited me as of that point
mum found me reading a manga book on my bed
and asked when i was seeing adam i told her i wasnt
she was very surprised and instantly asked what was up
i told her i just felt like i was in my own world and could be doing with seeing everyone
she said it was fair enough but i could instantly see the worry in her eyes
she was worrying about my mental deposition
i told her i was fine and that me and adam hadnt fallen out or anything
adam rang me up but he wasnt that talkative
it took a while for me to get the conversation to flow
just whats up with him? im finding it all very confusing
and when i next see him am i to go back into how everything was
we have had 6 whole days apart which isnt a lot but it feels like 2 weeks
and in that time ive done a lot of thinking prehaps too much thinking
and i dont know where his head is in with all this
i feel i have questions to ask but like i say i could be looking too much into this
he could be totally fine and just been resting what with feeling poorly
it just doesnt feel like hes wanted me much this week and thats strange for him
but it could just be because he was sick. who knows but i do feel a bit muddled with it all
im hoping things will all be alright when we actually meet up
which i said i would see him tomorrow
i just dont feel like im the right frame of mind somehow
after lunch i told myself i wouldnt sleep
even tho my body was heavy and i couldnt think straight
mum said they were going out but she didnt want to leave me
i told her i was fine
i had got paint out and dances up on my laptop to do and what did i go and do
i fell asleep
yup for 90mins
and in that time my parents had been out and come home again and i didnt hear a damn thing
but if it was during the night i guarantee you i would have heard them before they'd even pulled up the drive! its so unfair how i sleep heavy during the day than night
i was annoyed with myself to say the least
as i got nothing done
the girls had to be inside today as it has rained all day
but its bank holiday and its expected sleet for tomorrow and monday!
lovely!
i did manage a 15min walk with mum just for a bit of fresh air
i went through 2 dances which is the most dancing ive done all week
just not feeling it for dancing at the moment
im gonna do some easter nails tonight!
i hope i sleep
tomorrow i am seeing adam i will i will go
gotta do this
but i decided seeing as its easter and we have our residential easter bunny i would
surprise adam and his family by taking Ozwald up before we are invited up
well heck adam has no idea im gonna bring Oz up tomorrow
id like to sleep over as monday is mine and adam's 1st anniversary and it would
be nice if we could wake up together ^^
