Evening~~
Man I did not sleep well
woke up loads and ached and struggled to get off to sleep
woke up to the sound of my brother coming in a 3am
I woke up at 6am and laid there til dad got up at 7am
then got straight out of bed not being able to take another minute in bed
god i felt like id been run over -_____-
This morning I was a corpse
but mum dragged me out for a walk and we went into a cafe for a cup of tea
so that was nice
i came back and laid on my bed
had a bit of lunch i had bread with baked beans ^^
Later on I decided I had got to do some form of exercise
even tho I had been for a walk I ached and knew I had to do something to help myself
so i did that 30 minute dance zumba video
got 10 mins in an doubted that I could finish the whole video
but I did. somehow
then i went and did 3 dances from the dance wii game they were really good
the choreography is much harder but makes it fun to learn
makes it feel like a proper dance somehow
then i went for a much needed shower as i was wet through
after shower I sat with Oz for a brew
then I did 30 mins of yoga
so you cant say ive done nothing today
hopefully it will help
wont make me any worse anyway
made myself some dinner
i did a salad
then i came upstairs and coloured in Kyubimon
next is shading
im gonna write down some of the periodic table now
then sit with Oz and then bed as im shattered
tomorrow I might go for a run
i didnt want to go for one today
dont know what else i will do tho
Evening~
I didn't sleep too bad
only waking up once ^^ which is good considering it was a yoga night
I felt a bit run over this morning tho cus of yoga ><
School was hard work in the morning as I was dumped with the down syndrome child
and my god she was playing up and testing my patience but I got on with it
somehow
then lunch time
i ran to the pharmacy which was further away than I thought and I got sweaty
running in my coat and stuff
I walked back as I didnt want to be a pile of sweat coming back to school
luckily I had 5 mins to get a drink and have a wee then sit with the autistic child
which wasnt too bad thank god cus he looked like he weighed more than me
then I was doing readers then my break time went to the autistic child again
so i didnt get a lot of time to sit and relax today ive been on the go all day
after school i went straight to mias house
it was good to see her and found out my brother had stayed there 3 hours and left half hour before i came over XD honestly them two
he was taking photos for a project of her house and ended up chatting and seeing mia's sister
but good to see mia first time this year
my brother pointed out he had seen mia this year before me XD
We said we would book Manchester for my birthday when we meet up next
I left there and came home and had a shower and a sit with Oz
then had dinner and laid with stomach ache
only been on my laptop 30mins
might do some yoga and sit with Oz
i ache.....i hate aching bad before bed cus i wonder how i will get to sleep with such bad pain
but just cus im tired and been working
need a stretch out
tomorrow unsure yet what i will do
tempted to go for a run if it isnt too cold
Konbanwa~
I didn't sleep too bad as my sleep goes
I fell asleep before 10pm first time in a long time
and I also didnt wake to the sound of my brother coming in!
I did wake up at 2:30am and got up for a wee was awake for a bit
but then slept til 7am
still didnt want to get up tho I have to say
I still felt tired
I had school today
which was bloody confusing
confusing as there was staff off so I was working with a supply teacher
and she had no friggin clue what she was doing
at one point she left me with 30 kids for 5 or so minutes
so i played hang man as its a classic
the true teacher came in and was like "i can see youre having fun"
i felt like saying "yeah not really my job here but i had to get on with it"
it was very much a 'wing it' day
but the work was easy really
I came home for lunch
after lunch til the end of the day I just listened to kids read
well easy money really
boring but easy
I came in and sat with Oz and had a brew with him on my knee which was nice
then I did a 20 min dance video which wasnt as fun as the 30min one
but I felt I needed to do something even tho I had got yoga
so after that I studied a bit of science in prep for my interview
then we had yoga which was good and my core muscles will probably
hurt me tomorrow and probably my legs too
but good
then had dinner and a shower
next its Oz and bed~
Yesterday I got the outline finished on my picture
just got to colour it really then I will start ninetails
tomorrow its work again
then afterwards might see mia
im not coming home for lunch cus i gotta work and extra half hour during my lunch hour so it wont be worth me coming home, i might walk to the pharmacy down the road from the school and get my antidepressants, might as well do something productive with my lunch
i hate sitting in staffrooms its incredibly dull
then weekend!
too which I have no plans ><
Evening~
Barely slept -____- anxious about work
which was making me ache and feel sick
stupid really cus honestly what is there to be anxious about!?
how does it help thinking about it at midnight!? -___________-
not impressed and did not want to get up when I woke up at 7am
but I did and got myself ready for school
first day of work this year
School wow was i bombarded with information when I got there
I was to flit between 3 classrooms, work with specific children on specific work
and yeah the list went on and I could feel myself getting sick with anxiety
but to be honest I winged it and chilled out - just about
I was working with ages 5 - 6 years so yeah I was fine
and the staff I worked with were fine but very impersonal
I wasnt introduced to any class and some staff didnt even bother to catch my name!
but meh its part of being agency - your treated like an outsider
I came home at lunch and had hot chocolate and cake for lunch
a complete win for me XD
and rested as much as physically possible as I was shattered
cant say i wanted to go back to school but in my head i was telling
myself that it would help pay for manchester if i go next month with mia
at the end of the day i was told that i would be missing half my lunch on friday
to work with child >.> great
i came home and mum made me a tea and had got Oz in his hutch so i didnt have
the horrid daily task of trying to get him from out the shed
I had rang up at lunch the psychiatrist's secretary and asked for more antidepressants
and i had been given a message to say that the prescription was ready to collect
so i dashed out with mum at 4pm and got that so thats a good job done
then i came in and did a 30 min exercise video on youtube
god i had sweat on my neck and everything!
then i did 25mins of yoga and finally sat with Oz then had dinner
that was my day
im just gonna do some doodling now then shower, Oz, bed
tomorrow is school again
and been told it will be a similar day to today but different staff
hopefully it will go ok
and hopefully i will be able to sleep cus my god my eyes sting
oh yes and Ive been given an interview as a science technician on 17th January
cant say im hopeful about getting the job as theres always someone better out there than you isnt there but im still gonna give it a good go
Evening~
I went to bed at 9pm and read til just after 10pm
so when I woke up at realised it was only 11:50pm
I was not best pleased -_____-
why did I wake so soon!?
then I woke up at 3:15 for a bit
then finally woke up at 6am I got up at 6:30am and let Ozwald out in the dark
he likes being out the same time his wild cousins are out X3
so been awake since 6am really
I did my nails last night
and I thought in honour of Oz's birthday I would do bunny nails~
I could have quite easily have fallen back asleep this morning
but instead I got up and set off for the city centre at 9:15am
It was worth going as I managed to finish off my mum's and my brother's birthday presents
so thats a good job done and dusted
I picked up a hoodie for me reduced from £22 to £10 and its extra long ^^
and a pair of shorts reduced from £13 to £5
I was home for 12:20 so Id been a few hours
it was alright and had a good walk round places
I had a hot chocolate when mum came home
she said I havent been eating a lot lately which I havent but my antidepressants
are making me lose my appetite, just dont feel hungry
whereas the others the doctor offered me actually increase your appetite
glad im taking this type!
i think i am glad im on this medication even if it is taking some getting used to
i fell asleep for a bit on my bed as i just couldnt keep my eyes open anymore
then when i got up i some of Oz's birthday cake with a brew
then the agency rang and have offered me work at a school a 5min drive away
ive been once before and it was fine
got 3 days work
and i already feel anxious about it
just cus im so tired im not sure how im gonna get through the day
but with the school being so local at least i can go home for lunch :)
so I start there tomorrow at 8:30am
its work and money I guess
then i went on my laptop, helped with dinner, sat with Oz
i tried my new game as I managed to find for £1.99 in a charity shop today...
Just Dance 2015!! been looking for it in game stores but having no luck
and today it was there just in a charity shop and soooo cheap to!! well happy
it works and i only went on one dance just to see if it worked
its hard but good and got better songs on it than 2014 i have to say
so i look forward to giving that a blast
which might be tomorrow after work as its set to be about 3c tomorrow
so not sure i will be wanting to walk or run after school in that ><
and thats it really
might draw or dance tonight
depending on if i can shift this stomach ache i have
i hope i sleep tonight so im not too shattered for school tomorrow
and i hope school goes ok ><
Konbanwa~~
Today is my beloved Ozwald's 2nd Birthday!! <3 <3 <3
So lucky to have my Oz
he is the best natured bunny I have ever had and I love him so much
very grateful for his loveliness~
I had a little photo shoot of him this morning to take his birthday snap
Look how cute he is, took 15mins for this shot!
he is not an easy model! but thats fine, im patient with him :)
I had a real rubbish nights sleep
honestly I dont think I slept much and was up for an hour
so I was shattered this morning
But i got up and went to see my birthday boy I gave him lots of fuss
and I took my camera out and took a couple of snap shots of him being cute outside
then after I had some cereal I began to make his cake
which went alright, im no pro at cakes
but seems ok I am yet to try it tho
Then did some house work and then laid on my bed think I drifted off for half hour
got up and looked at jobs
then I did 30 mins of yoga
i was just so dead honestly took me til 4pm to feel semi-decent
sick of feeling so crap
its just meds and stuff
i did a 15min work out video
then I did my dinner which was kinda like pizza bread as we had leftover stuff to make it from
and then i sat with Oz for a bit
might do some dancing in a bit and maybe some drawing
evenings feel long at times
think I will do my nails tonight as well
do bunny nails~
tomorrow mum is busy all day
so i might go city centre or something
check sales out
i like to check them out to see if i can buy any gifts for people and store them away
cheaper that way~
Im glad I did something for Oz's birthday tho bless him
plastered his photo on ever social media I have XD
love him~
Konbanwa~
I didn't sleep too bad last night as nights go for me
so i wasnt too shattered this morning
i wasnt sure what to do today whether to go for a run or dance
feel my days revolve round exercise
in the end in the morning
i made something else that needed replacing in the bathroom
so it looks fresher in there and mum is pleased with my craft skills
amazing how faded some things become in the sun light
I did half hour of yoga
my god how i needed to do yoga at 11pm last night as my hips werent quite in socket
but i somehow fell asleep, so this morning i knew i needed to put them back into place
so i did some yoga as yoga 99% of the time puts bones back in place ^^
then i read on my bed for a bit
I got up and went for a walk cus today we had actual sunshine
like clear skies and sun! it reached 14c today! great day
so i felt i should make the most of it and went for a walk just round here
i couldnt be bothered to drive
I came in and did 20 mins of dancing
it was alright cus i could blast music out but i was a bit low on energy
then i did a face pack and had a shower
did some drawing
sat with Oz
my Ozwald who is 2 years old tomorrow!!
i must sort out some stuff to take his photo with tomorrow :3
havent done much else since that really
im quite tired now
i put on a pair of skinny jeans i found in my wardrobe, i wanted to see what my legs look like in skinny jeans and theyre not that skinny :/
dont know if thats a good thing or not really
ive really craved sugar today as well XD but been quite good
making Oz a cake tomorrow so there will be sugar to be had!
i will photograph him tomorrow bless him
tomorrow just baking a cake thats all i got arranged
and i will start looking at jobs again
wow fun!
