this time next week I should be a house owner!

 Evening

I slept like crap last night, felt so tired this morning, literally woke up every hour

so yeah quite tired today

school went ok I had 2 practicals, one of which took a lot of work on my part to be honest

and i had just had enough. but got the day done

i had 2 cookies jack brought me and my heart went out of rhythm 

so sick of this! its not fair! I love sugary foods but now it seems like i deemed to suffer eating them

it sucks so much! to the point where i wonder if it is even worth eating them T^T

we showed Hannah pictures of the bungalow today and she really liked it

We got home and had a brew

then I did 40mins of dancing ^^ it felt good to do some and i wasnt even that out of breath afterwards, was sweaty tho and I dont think Jack has ever seen me that sweaty before XD

I had a shower and got in pyjamas and ate my dinner with my brother as Jack had some online scout meeting that went on for 90mins! so he had dinner after  us

I sat with Oz on the sofa whilst he ate his dinner, there was a few fireworks but nothing compared to last night so i luckily havent needed to have Oz in my bedroom tonight

god I hope i sleep tonight im so done

jack is playing on his laptop on my desk, hes online with theo and harvey i encouraged him to play online with them as i think its healthy for him to talk to his friends now. 

i just hope he doesnt finish up too late

tomorrow 

i will dance in the morning ^^ then to be honest I am unsure what is happening

be my last weekend of freedom before i am tethered to a house!

stupid fireworks

 Evening

I slept pretty well in fact i looked at the time this morning thinking it was gonna be 3am and i could stay longer in bed but it was like 5:50am! so i got up

All day i have felt sickly anxious like when youre gonna do an exam

i got the day done at school some how but i kept stopping as my heart was going erratic and what with running around with a mask on, it was making me feel quite dizzy and faint. a few times i felt like if something was to go wrong or someone have a go at me id literally cry. very much at breaking point. my heart goes out of rhythm a lot today, mostly when I think about the house!

im just having an off day im sure

i spoke to chris and he says he has a whole week off work and nothing to do and its literally as we get the keys he has a weeks so hes kindly offered his amazing DIY and electrical skills to the bungalow and to be honest he looks more excited about doing it up than i do! and he knows how to do sooo much as hes done it all before. i hope he can help but i also dont expect it.

I got home after work feeling knackered 

it hurt to walk and joints hurt a lot so i knew i was gonna be doing yoga tonight and not a walk so after a sit with a brew i did 45mins of yoga and felt a bit better for it, helped with dinner but ended up getting Oz and the girls in half way through our dinner as the fireworks out side had reached a loud and stupid point and they dont like the noise so they came in

and its 8pm and Oz his laying under my bed, well happy, and also hot. hes been running around upstairs that much that hes made himself rather warm! but he total forgets about the fireworks when he comes in my room he loves it so much, just cus its such a rare treat for him. literally only bring him in bonfire night and the weekend it is close to as thats the worse for fireworks. keeps it a treat for him something special and distracting 

tomorrow it is friday thank bloody god

dont know how i am gonna get through the following weeks

8 days til i am a house owner..... 

Friday 13th

Po~n

I slept really well, I got up for a massive wee and kinda zombie walked to bed and slept really well dreaming of vampire ghost, and trains, and yeah it was weird but kept me asleep til 5:40am so yeah not bad at all

and the morning was fine just needed to defrost my car for the first time 0.0 cold morning

school was alright, glad the heating is on ^^

I had practicals today and they went fine~

just a tiring day really feel like I didnt stop really

when I was driving home my lips felt tingly and when I got home I realised that my lips were red and swollen and red all round them and very very very itchy 

its now 8pm and i still want to scratch my face off despite cleaning it twice and applying creams...

im not sure if i have chemical on my face from my practicals, its the only thing i can think of what could effect my face like this, sure it will be fine. I looked at 'cures' but nothing really just says it can cause skin irritation.

Not much left of my evening T^T

I had some news today

it has been confirmed that friday 13th November we will get the keys to the bungalow!

the end is finally in sight

thank god

but it also makes me want to cry and panic, i dont feel adult enough to handle this situation 

i guess its good to finally get a date confirmed even if it did end up being friday 13th XD

tomorrow just school and got practicals  

just another tiring day of sharing a single bed 0.0

 Evening

I kinda slept but yeah its not the same and quite tiring keep waking up and woke up at 5:15am and stayed awake until i had to get up so i was quite tired to be honest

found work difficult as well to be honest, by 10:30am I had some pain killers i usually have at 1pm but i was desperate and in pain

I had 5 bowls of chemistry washing up to do...so many test tubes T^T

I had to take a laptop to the DT technician who has corona so we dropped it off at his house on the way home as he lives 2 streets away from here! small world!

I went for a walk with mum after school it was very chilly ><

not done a lot since then as I look like death I am so tired

gonna have hot chocolate with Oz now

and hopefully sleep....

I was laying in bed last night, tired, thinking "every night brings me another day closer to the bungalow, I dont even want it" but i know it was just cus i was tired

first school day back together

Otsukararesama deshita~

I slept a lot better last night compared to the previous night

woke up a lot and i think got up for a wee but on the whole slept better and didnt need to get up for pain killers so i think switching sides worked

we got up for school this morning well i got up at 5:45am and jack 6:20am as I was getting breakfast together, showering and drying my hair

My heart was going out of rhythm on the way to school which wasnt nice to be honest

but school on the whole went pretty well and pretty quickly 

it was an alright day :) 

and we found out that despite lockdown the bed people can still deliver our bed

sadly jack can not continue with his driving lessons so we might have to insure him on my car and take him out on weekends to keep the practice up

cant have it all i guess

we got home and mum pretty much went out to walk with her friends outside

we sat with Oz and had a brew

i left jack upstairs on his switch whilst i did 35mins of yoga then helped with dinner

since then just got ready for school and im just gonna mong out in front of a couple of videos then go fetch and go bed as i am shattered

but as first days back go it was alright to be honest

and jack seems ok here, just hope i sleep tonight, theres really not much room -___-

it's a single bed for a reason

 Evening~

Man did I not sleep -_____- theres probably a reason why it's called a SINGLE bed 

really wasnt any room! i couldnt get comfy, i did fall asleep literally straight away at 10pm but woke up at midnight then from there I got up cus I was conscious of waking Jack up, so I was up for a good hour then came to bed and surprisingly didnt disturb him! he said he slept pretty well. I woke up loads and couldnt get comfy, tonight we are gonna try swap sides and see if that makes any difference. Still its nice to have him there :)

This morning I had a very stressy mother she is having a massive stress over the lock down 

so i stayed out her way this morning

me and jack went to go meet harvey brandon and theo in the park and we went for a walk round together which was really nice then me and jack came home and had a rest and had lunch

then pretty much just rested as I was shattered, sorted out a few bits and stuff

we havent done an awful lot today but that suits me what with having work tomorrow

Im a bit anxious about work but i think my main issue with work is 'will i sleep tonight?' 'will i be able to get through the day?' we shall see. Just in a lot of pain lately and medication and pain makes life harder and tiring.

i spent my evening looking for art work to do next cus obviously i finished my halloween art work so what do i draw next? thinking a digimon picture for a change possibly 

I ordered my 2021 calendar online today, doesnt feel like 5 mins since i ordered this years! this year has been fast and weird. i have ordered another japanese calendar and its a cinnamonrol one so its got white bunnies on it X3

tomorrow is school - the last term before we break up for christmas

despite lockdown schools remain open! whats the point!? guess im kinda glad in a way cus it keeps me in a structured routine. but at the same time id take any time off i can get XD

i will be going school with jack it will be his first school morning at this house

im sure he will be fine

my mother did calm down by the afternoon shes just worried and hopes we can still get the bungalow on time

it's halloween 2020! and Jack lives with me!

 Happy Halloween~~~~~

I did not sleep last night it was so hot in the house I was literally sweating T___T

so by midnight I got up, opened up my windows and went downstairs for a bit

came to bed around 1am then fell asleep but kept waking up cus of the wind outside was so strong, i sleep so light so the littlest of the noises wakes me up and what woke me up was the gate blew open and of course no one else would wake up and hear the gate banging so i was the one to get up and close it and of course by which point i am awake and in pain so yup i was up til 6:50 I went back to bed for an hour or so.

I did some dancing this morning but because i had a lot on my mind i kept screwing up a lot, really crappy dancing but it was exercise, then had a shower

after which i played around with make up until i achieved this sort of look 

Halloween photos! been such a long time since i have taken any photos of myself

After lunch I sorted out my bedroom as i got it ready to house the Jack XD

my bed is in the middle of my room which has NEVER happened before it looks soooo strange but had to be done and then I had a bit of sort out 

mum made some cakes and we decorated them X3

I was left home alone and fell asleep for a bit cus i was just shattered

then I pretty much got a txt from Jack asking if he could set off

his mum and step dad dropped him off and we talked on the drive way for a bit but it was very cold 

then we were left with Jack

to be honest it has been nice seeing him outside of work. and with new restrictions coming into place its a good time for him to move in with us. 

he brought his pumpkin and we carved them

mine is on the left~ obviously better

we had dinner then after wards we went for a walk at 7:45pm 

i wanted to see if many people had bothered to put up halloween decorations and very few actually had so it was a bit sad and no one really treat or treating. 

we came back and sat with Oz who was very very happy to see Jack think he ended up grooming the whole of Jack's face! 

now we're just in my bedroom and going to start one of many night sharing a single bed......

im happy to have him by my side once again

we will work it out but boris johnson is suppose to be announcing something at 10pm could be an actual lockdown - who knows!

we said we would meet theo and harvey in the park tomorrow as it is still allowed but i guess that depends on tonights announcement as well but it would be nice to see them i havent seen anyone for such a long time its so sad 

apart from that i havent really got any plans tomorrow

oh i uploaded my Noibat Pumpkaboo picture as well today

halloween has been much much better than i thought it was gonna be