I'm quite fed up lately
I had a crackin' time at Mia's last night
I didn't get home til gone 10:30pm - what a rebel XD
After that my evening went rapidly down hill
I didn't sleep til gone 5am...
I was aching and in need of Tramadol but I havent taken it in like 2 weeks
i refused to cave into it, I chose to suffer and go without sleep than to ruin my clean streak
So I fell asleep after 5am and woke up at 8:30am
great
I was shattered as this day 3 of crap sleep
Im still not myself mentally
i still cant eat like a normal person
Im skipping breakfast cus theres no point in it
My morning consisted of going to a couple of shops with mum
we managed to pick Karen up something for her birthday
We popped into pets at home for bunny food and they had baby guineas like literally hamster size they were very young and very noisy and very cute X3
We came home and mum made me a salad
wooooo salad -____- its wearing thin fast
after lunch I made a roast vegetable soup by winging it again no recipe
after that I did some more drawing
and then mum was going up to Nigel's so she dropped me off at adams house
so I was only seeing him for an hour which at the moment is enough cus im growing bored and agitated very quick and easily.
But what was the point in me going up today? id say none what so ever
literally i spoke more to his dad than to him and I didnt go up there to make idle chit chat with his dad. so it annoyed me and i was sure to txt him and tell him. I also told him im sick of being court jester to him and his family. Literally every saturday i come away feeling ive talked more to his parents than i have to him i feel like I go up entertaining them all. I entertain his parents by talking and he just watches and listens. its never a 4 way convo and its peeing me off so ive told him now and I know ive probably made him feel crap but its making me feel crap every time i come away on a saturday or whatever. He says he will try harder.
But today it literaly gave me no time to talk to him about anything
sometimes i choose to go in his room just so i can talk to HIM and not his parents
i love his parents and i like talking to them but at the end of the day i go up to see HIM not them.
see what happens, im fed up of everything currently. and my relationship which is suppose to make me happy and enjoy life is just adding to the fed up list quite frankly.
I can't make any rash decisions when im like this. im not planning of splitting up cus next week i might be totally different. we shall see
Anyway for dinner I had soup
woooo soup again!
feel like ive nothing but moaned here tonight
I need to dance I need to get out my system but ive got stomach ache and i dont feel that well actually but i want to soldier on and do what i wanna do.
Tomorrow so far as i know ive just got yoga in the evening if im ok to go as last week i couldnt face going what with how my stomach was or in fact still is.
Heres a japanese facial product i brought the other week and Ive been using it for 4 days in a row and my god my face is so soft and glows which is what the reviews say but you can never fully believe reviews but i am impressed i have to say!
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