An easier interview

Evening~~

I got up for a run this morning
mum dropped me off at a park whilst she drove the park car park and did her own route and drove home again whereas i just ran straight for home, wasnt a long run by any means
probably 20-25mins but still a run
i came back and showered 

i got ready really for my interview
i left with plenty of time to spare
i arrived at the nursery and a woman answered the door and told me i was at the wrong place....ah i instantly panicked but she told me the place i did want was like a minute away and across the road and she'd let them know i was here
so i went to find this place
could i find it?
like literally couldnt see it
the road was less than 100m long how hard can it be!?
turns out it was hidden behind a garage with a small A4 plaque 
i would never have found it
i was panicking until a woman called out to me and i walked over and she said she'd come to fetch me and it happens all the time
so i was relieved i had been found!
she said i wasnt late or anything and to breathe XD

i was taken to an empty office where the interview took place
it was standard questions but i found them easy
ever since that head teacher went through everything with me i feel more confident with how ive got to answer stuff, and the lady was really really nice to me and put me at ease
wasnt a grilling anyway
at the end she said she liked me, id done well at the interview and would like to take it further so when i was next available could I come work with them for an hour to see how i get along with children and the staff and for me to see if i like it
i told her i could do tomorrow morning
so im booked in for 10am tomorrow to work in the nursery 
never ever worked in a nursery before
2 -4 years old
GULP! i hope theyre not bratty XD
good area tho so hopefully it will go ok
im still not 100% on what the job entails but i can check it out

i came home and had a brew and cereal as i felt drained from all that!
i had lunch later on with mum then went to go pick adam from gym
we went into a town for a walk through the woods and charity shops
i picked up an awesome coat
i know - coat - in summer
but i couldnt resist it was sick
its like a fawn colour with a loose cowl hood and is very cape like
and if its something i love, its capes
always had a thing for capes
ponchos, capes
gotta love em
it was £6 in very very condition and originally from Zara
so probably £60 in shops
i was very hot from walking and needed to take my make-up off

i decided that id go back to my house
and since ive spoken out about how i feel about house guests
i feel more relaxed like the air has been cleared in a way
i didnt have this pressured cloud over me
so we stayed here for 90mins then went back to adams house
he had a brew with his dad but i couldnt sit there so sat in the other room catching up on txt messages i hadnt done yet

we went in his bedroom afterwards
he wanted to give me affection but i didnt want it
feel very hollow like theres no feeling what so ever
its only gotten worse past few days
and it eventually lead to us two talking a few things out
how im struggling with feelings and stuff and what he thinks
it was worth doing as we both dont know whats on each other's minds
it was that involved i ended up being late for dinner

i came home and had dinner
i spoke to mum about what id talked to adam about
finding the last few days hard/difficult/different
im used to this voice being there but its not there and when youve had something since you were like 10 years old, to suddenly not have it feels weird 
it feels like something is missing and a reassurance has gone
im alone now
it should feel fantastic
but it doesnt
why doesnt it?
and i dont have all my emotions ether
so it hasnt cured that issue

mum told me she read in a mental health magazine that something good for body conscious people and those who dont like their bodies is Burlesque dancing...yup
so i said if i could find somewhere id give it ago
couldnt find anywhere near me that did it, all in town or other end of town

tomorrow im going for another run in the morning
mum is dropping me off again
then im doing this hour at the nursery, then seeing adam, then packing for friday, then doing my nails in the evening. woah full on day man~