Friday, 20 December 2019

Finished for 2019!

Evening

Did not sleep
didnt sleep til 2am
i ached and couldnt sleep
but laying in bed all day and not exercising is literally the worst thing i can do to myself
so it was to be expected
i even got up for a hot chocolate but it made no odds

i was shattered this morning
truly shattered
it was nice not having to have a cold shower tho as i think that would have finished me  off
i got to school and waited for jack
he was questioning whether i should be in or not, guess i looked bad XD

i did all the little jobs i needed to do before we broke up
we took the lift at around 11:30am to go to julia's car as she had brought in a load of glass ware from her husbands work place, soooooo many bottles. about £2000 worth...
i got in the lift with jack to go back upstairs
upon getting out the lift i almost fainted....
i know i was asking a lot of my body but i was almost there damn it!
julia saw and her and jack helped me into the print room opposite the lift and i sat in a chair
shaking
i told them id be fine
few mins later the school nurse pops in....ugh
me and her are like BFF i feel XD she sees me so much and not for the right reasons
i told her i was fine i just wasnt doing wel and havent been digesting food properly for 7 weeks now, she asked if i had been doctors i said no. she said i should go for a blood test to see if i am lacking any vitamins and stuff. but hell with that. i aint volunteering myself for that
i got up and walked to the prep room where i sat at my computer and typed up a tech guide
then it was lunch
christmas lunch no less
it wasnt bad actually
and the cake and custard at the end was good but tiny portions >.>
luckily for me chris gave me his pudding ^^ so i was happy
but also incredibly full
and the stomach pain soon encroached upon me
at this point we were going home anyway
i got home and went to bed

got up and still had stomach pains
had a brew with Ozwald
then laid on my bed with stomach pains
its 8:30pm and the pain has kinda gone but feels burny now
mum didnt make me eat dinner i told her i ate so much at lunch i couldnt face more food and more stomach pain

did a bit of dancing
got to the end of onepixcel's final call
i want to do girls dont cry next which doesnt look too bad

tomorrow im gonna dance in the morning 
well id like to anyway
not sure how dead i will be 
then not sure what i will do
at 2pm im set to have a lunch out with jack's family
not sure yet if im seeing him before or after the meal
see what he wants to do 
hes got a night out with the lads in the evening so i know im not staying
he says i can go out with them but hell no on that one
last saturday before christmas.....suicide 
but what i will do with the rest of the day remains to be seen
i have mia's table cloth to do and her present to wrap
as im seeing her sunday evening

right im all done with school now til i think its 6th jan
have all that time to literally recover
and start my new no-fun-diet 
it is good knowing i can recharge tho

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