ditching the egg

Yay another week done!!

I went to bed with strong anorexic thoughts
thoughts of having to weigh myself in the morning and how fat I was
just relentless
i was determined i wouldnt fall victim to the scales in the morning

I slept pretty well last night
was a chore to get up for school
Oz used me for a treat this morning
i was able to be strong and not weigh myself

i got to work and just wanted to get the day done really
the day wasnt too bad
but my god my blood pressure felt really low
i was doing a lot of sitting down work today
and i did a display board which just needed things tacked on
but every time i lifted my arms up i felt the blood literally drain out of them instantly 
its like im not pumping blood hard enough well enough
so i did take it easier today as i didnt want to pass out
i have 4 practicals to look forward to on monday tho -__-

i got home and had a brew with Oz and cut the girls claws
the lovely job that it is to do
mum found the blood pressure machine for me
i had ago and it said I had high blood pressure! i said "its probably from cutting the girls claws"
cus that stresses me out XD
im gonna do it as soon as i wake up tomorrow
i had an omelette too

i went upstairs and fell asleep til dinner
i had got stomach pains i think from the egg so i was trying to crawl up into a ball and i ended up falling asleep
apparently answered my mum that i knew it was dinner time but in my sleep!
so she had to physically wake me ><
i had dinner
then i went for a walk and then did physio exercises

i dont think egg is agreeing with me
so im gonna ditch that one off the menu for now and i have a go later down the line
at the weekend i hope to try bread

im having my hair cut tomorrow!
thank god cus i can not see
and it needs a tidy
then i think im gonna go over to jack's for a bit he needs stuff and we need stuff for work also
i MIGHT get my ears pierced depending on how well i feel
then i'll be home in the evening

i am struggling with my thoughts at the moment
and my mum has said if i need to go and hypnotherapy then they'll support me with it
but i dont want to go 
i hope i'll be ok
but we shall see
mental health is an awful thing