been 18 months

 Evening

I went over to Jack's around 8pm last night

he had been out drinking - heavily - the night before so I wasnt in a rush to head over

as i knew he wouldnt be in a good way XD

When i saw him, he was really dark under the eyes and looked rough

he had been up til 5am, drunk half a bottle of vodka, few gins, few ciders 

and hes hasnt been drinking for months

think it hit him quite hard

he also did something very very stupid which he told me not to 'freak out' about before he told me

basically in his drunken state he decided to try and climb his balcony from the pavement

i cant even touch his balcony from the pavement and hes not that much taller than me

so it was just stupid

and i could tell he must have been incredibly drunk to try this as its not safe and goes against his very nature to do unsafe acts

he had tried, failed, and rolled onto the pavement in his shorts and t-shirt

so he grazed his hands and got deep grazes on his knee caps that are now starting to bruise also

i was not impressed and didnt shout at him or anything but i did say once he lifted his shorts up to show the evidence

"ok jack and now what if i had done that?"

he said "yeah....i wouldnt have been very happy. probably how youre feeling now"

i said "we're suppose to moving out soon, what would have happened if you had broke your leg? you wouldnt be much help to me would you"

he said "i know, yeah youre right. it was stupid. i know"

i thought 'im so having this' XD

"and what would have happened if you had hit your head and ended up in hospital and i had found out you were in hospital?"

he hugged me and apologised for like the thousandth time

in all honesty i wasnt mad, i just thought he'd been an idiot and was glad he was alright

theo came in with his work friend and we sat talking for a bit

then he left and i went on jack's bed

did my tens machine and just rested really

took me til about midnight to actually sleep cus i was struggling to get comfy but once i was actually asleep i did sleep through til 8:30am

i got jack up which was a real effort XD

today marks our 18 month anniversary - feels so much longer 0.0

we had breakfast which was cereal and i managed it with my dodgey jaw

i had a bath, and my god was it a hot bath, my skin glew pink~~~~

i felt dizzy in the bath and my heart felt like it was pounding out my chest

but the pain of literally cooking my skin was a welcome change to my usual pain

psychotic i know, as i was essentially poaching my skin XD

i didnt feel good so knew i should get out, i shouted jack cus he told me to get him if im dizzy in the bath so i dont faint when getting out (he worries too much)

but he had the fan on in the bedroom so he couldnt hear me

so i got out slowly but my god my vision was blurring so i quickly made it into the bedroom and collapsed on the bed jack was like "you ok!? whats up?" i said "hot jack and very dizzy"

he said "you should have said"

i said "i shouted but you couldnt hear"

he looked so sad and guilty XD

we went round the shops as its his younger sister's 15th birthday today

and jack being jack, forgot

so once again i was helping him get bday presents 

i know she loves make-up and beauty and korean stuff

so i told him TK MAXX usually has korean face sheets in

we managed to get korean face sheets, lip masks, and shoulder massage pad things

i think she will really like those presents

i was dead happy as we found a glass pumpkin in there and we've brought it for the kitchen windowsil for the bungalow, i think its beautiful but then i do have a fetish for pumpkins

halloween stuff is starting to come in and i LOVE it ^^

we came back and had soup which i was grateful of- needs very little chewing XD

after lunch we sorted out surveyors 

jack gave them all the details and paid almost £500 for it all ><

he insisted tho as ive been paying for the stuff for the house lately

then we sorted out jacks wardrobe well his clothes really as so many are from his uni days - 10 years ago, and so are faded, rough, have holes in

and it annoys me -____- dresses likes a 40 year old man - his friends words not mine XD

so we threw out 2 bin liners full of clothes and a big carrier bag of underwear

he has been buying clothes since hes been with me so he could afford to throw some away

its all less to pack up and unpack when he does move

i know i have stuff to sort out

he says he has other stuff to sort out

he treated me to ice cream which was cookies and cream flavour

it was sooo good but made me cold

i came home cus i have to cus of Ozwald

got to keep him happy

also its raining today so he cant play out 

my god actual rain!

hopefully tonight it will be easier to sleep

think im seeing jack on tuesday next

we're hoping to make a joint bank account

tomorrow probably exercise

i have a craft idea in mind but unsure if i have the stuff to actually do it