Our 4th Bunny Anniversary

 Evening

I was able to do my exercises and have a bath then didnt have much longer to wait for jack to finish gaming. However I was aching a lot and struggled to get to sleep, i mean by the time he's come off off his game at 10pm, got hot drinks and had my pain killers, watched inuyasha, got ready for bed. Its like gone 10:30pm then it can take me a good half hour to actually drop off. So its like gone 11pm when i get to sleep. last night it was closer to midnight as I was just aching. But I am having to get up at 6:15am for school so im getting like 7 hours of sleep. i can not sustain this. I need 9 hours. I have a fatigue illness and take many painkillers. And it is slowly but surely draining me. So I have told this Jack and i think he is resigning to the fact that we have got to be in bed earlier = less time gaming. Once again my illness gets in the way of life.

So we got to school and once again school was difficult. I am just so tired. its hard to think or do anything heck this morning I couldnt be bothered to even speak to people!

A science teacher was turning 40 in the holidays and another science teacher came in from maternity leave to say hello to everyone, safe to say, there was a lot of cakes and chocolate....like seriously...-_____- I hate my life. So I was SO SO SO good at resisting all this loveliness. It killed me.

I got through the day anyway. Jack had his treats.  Mum met me at home, she washed up for ^^; honestly that woman lives to clean. Oz was happy playing the garden. I announced to mum it was our 4th anniversary so we were talking about baby Ozwald. She had a cup of tea with us and I had my 2nd proper cup of tea of the day! i havent had 2 cups of tea in one day since before my diet. But i was so annoyed with missing out as much as I did today!

she left us and we had our stew, which was really nice. Then I played outside with Oz for the rest of the evening which was nice. I went for what I thought was a wee but my stomach was like "now I have your attention and you're on the toilet" and had other plans for me. And then thats when i died on the toilet. yet again....why!? so I basically skipped out on all those cakes and chocolates today for nothing!!!!! I swear if I have put weight on this week after all this physical and mental torture I will just give this damn diet up!!!!

So its made me later than I would have liked tonight, so I am gonna blitz through my exercises like I usually do then have a quick dip in the bath then let jack have the bath then watch inuyasha and go to god damn sleep.

Tomorrow

It is the last day of term!!! finally

it is also non-uniform for staff and students. Seeing as it is easter this weekend I am gonna wear a cute bunny top and a multicoloured checked skirt, with a bunny hair clip ^^

But I made sure to spend lots of time with Oz today, spoiled him to extra treats. He was shown even more love today X3 I love him so much. He is just my life I live for him. He does so much for me. he is the best and i best have many more anniversaries with him

setting the fire alarm off for the second time

 Konbanwa~

I wanted to get on with my evening and do my exercises but ended up dying on the toilet for half hour last night which felt so unfair. So i didnt finish my exercises and climb in the bath til 9:20pm!! well late but jack was playing with harvey and theo til 10pm anyway so i couldnt have gone to bed any earlier any how.

I was so tired last night, but for whatever reason it took me til 11pm to get to sleep then I had a rather disturbing and deep dream. I dreamed of two young east european guys that went round killing or hurting people with a hammer and a rusted blade. They got their mother involved in the murdering and thats when my alarm went off but took me a few seconds to wake up enough to shut it off whereas usually i hit it in the first second - im quick

I didnt die on toilet this morning which was nice, I was able to bring Oz in for 20mins and have breakfast with him, normally i sit inside and watch him in the garden but I felt like eating with him and I had gained time. We dropped him off and went school

School was quiet for me. But it was cold. It was a cold morning and school didnt have the heating on. It makes me feel unwell after a while and I was on the floor in a ball. Jack found a small fan heater so put that on in the office, made me tea and it did revive me. But it leaves me feeling drained for a while

Jack wasnt too stressed this morning which surprised me after yesterdays explosives - that he is still waiting to hear from. However...He needed to train the 2 trainee teacher on 'thermite' I havent ever personally seen thermite as I missed it in my first few months doing the job, the next year we went to do it we went into lock down so this year I wanted to see it. For those who dont know what the thermite is about its basically a fire work that makes a small molten metal sludge ball at the end.

so we went into an empty lab and got to work. It was me julia, jack and 2 trainees. Jack set it up and talked us through it. I can tell he loves it >.> such a nerd. One trainee asked "does this set the fire alarm off?" He said "no no it doesnt usually". He then stuck two unlit sparklers in the powder and said "once this is lit you need to move away, fast. It can happen and spark fast. Who wants to do it?" I shot my hand up saying "ill do it!!" then turned to see if the other 3 wanted a go but no one wanted to do it! Julia was like "youre fearless Jo" I said "nah im just naive" so I went to the chemicals. One trainee started to record on the science camera so we had a video version. I went to light the sparklers using camping stove burner thing (bunsens we not behaving) and then briskly walked away.

we watched the chemical reaction take place. It was like having a fire work in the classroom/lab. I can see why we had to be 4 metres away. It finished reacting and we walked over to go look at the molten metal it had left behind and thats when the fire alarm went off -_____- second time we have gone to record a practical and the alarm has gone off. So someone is coming out on thursday to look at them as they shouldnt keep going off like that. However it was a really nice sunny day so no one complained too much at us. 

I got the day done some how and then we went to pick Oz up, he was sat with truffle on the sofa with us ^^ mum and jack had a brew but I didnt want one. I forgot to have one when I came home too! >< 

I came home and Jack let Oz into the garden. I went to put Jack's pizza in the oven and then warm my stew through. We had dinner and Jack cleared up, I sat outside with Oz in the sun. Then just been on my laptop. Going to go sort stuff out for tomorrow then I will do my exercises. I plan on starting a new exercise challenge on friday. I was gonna change it anyway but choly ting brought a new video out yesterday which works well for but I havent actually seen how much is involved yet! might be crazy hard yet!

tomorrow is school, but also a special day for me and Oz

tomorrow is our 4 year anniversary!!!

dealing with explosives

 Evening

I did my 2 exercise videos last night, had a bath and just as I came out the bath and finished moisturising, jack  appeared from his study, so that was good timing. He finished early so therefor we got to go bed to early! I had managed to wind down by treating my face and hair then did my nails. Which didnt come out as well as I liked but theyre better than nothing

I slept well but getting up felt very much like sunday morning, it felt like I had missed a day of my weekend somehow. Couldnt believe it was monday already --_____--

But got on with the day. Mum reported that Oz was fine, we both missed him this morning i have to say

Hes just such a part of our routine ^^

School was quiet for me. I didnt have a rushed busy day but I did keep myself busy. I recorded a practical with a trainie teacher. I did a recording last week too with Luke. Feel like camera woman. I got printing done for after easter - i will probably be given more printing to do tho! I assisted jack with writing down the chemical 'wish list' then towards the end of the day an A-level practical was happening. It involves serious chemicals. They were told how to dispose of the chemicals but some bright spark literally poured it all into one jug, effectively making an explosive. Jack panicked at the news. Had to ring our chemical hot line basically that provides chemical support for all the UK high schools and college. They were like 'yeah you need to ring chemical disposal ASAP' so jack did. We need to have this lovely little bundle professionally disposed as we cant dispose of it ourselves due to its explosive nature. This is a service we have got to pay for and it wont be cheap....They said they will collect it in the week. Cant be that dangerous if theyre not coming ASAP. but jack bottled it up, sealed it, and put it in a fume cupboard. but he was MASSIVELY stressed. Like I stayed well out the way.

I drove us home as I knew his mind was else where.

I collected Oz and brought him home to the garden to chill out as he was a bit stressed. by the time we made tea and got dressed he had calmed down and i brought him inside whilst we had tea, so he could destress Jack. 

I made jack a good dinner and he did chill out. Hes playing with theo and harvey now. So im glad to have some ME time alone. I have been tense for hours I feel.

I ordered some nail varnish online as I want a few colours, and I have a brand of nail varnish that i like the colours the it peels my nails, so i must bin them really.

Tonight I will do my 2 exercise videos. Then bath then inuyasha, the usual

Oz is snoring in front of me so I will take him home to bed >.> hard day Oz?

Tomorrow just school. 3 days to go!

My Bunny Door

 Evening

I managed 3 exercise videos last night, had my bath and had a hot chocolate! made with water not milk but I enjoyed it ^^

I slept ok and needed my alarm for shopping as clocks went forward today so we lost an hour of sleep >.>

we got up and went food shopping

As soon as  I came home mia was setting off so I didnt  have long but got everything packed away

Me and mia went for a dog walk that last 90mins simply cus the dogs wouldnt stop sniffing everything and eating every stick, barking at other dogs. Makes me glad that I can go for a walk without a dog. Would never have a dog. But it was good to see her and have a catch up.

I came in and had a tea then did my soup, whilst it cooked I cleaned Oz out who still finds it just as amusing as he did on day one. Here is his garage door that I use every day to get to him~

It was a chipped white door with a silver rusted handle now look, I love it

I came in and had my soup as I needed warming through, then I went to bed. I just had nothing more to give to be quite honest! I was done. But even after my sleep I cant say i felt any better for it. Much to my disappointment. I got Oz in the booted him outside to do the bathroom. Then I rounded him back up to take over to mum's. Dad and my brother were taking the hutches out the shed. So Oz was investing the shed as it might as well have been a brand new shed how much he was checking it out....

I had a brew with mum then spoke to mum and dad about the carpet. Dad doesnt think we should have expensive carpet. He worries we will get sick of it, and says our doors will need planing off as the carpets wont go under them. Luckily he had ordered a planer today XD think he saw the problem coming! 

I came home without Oz, mum is having him tonight to save me time in the morning but I will miss him. I told jack what my dad says. But jack wants to go ahead and have expensive carpets and says hes used a planer before and will do the door. He took it all so well. Like were talking more work and expense here but he wants to do it?....very odd behaviour for jack. I said Im happy for whatever as whatever we do i need help with. Some doors dont go smoothly over our carpets now so whatever we have the doors will have to made shorter.

we did the dinner which was nice. Usually when its our fish and chips night I cook salmon and sweet potato but i complained to jack that salmon is getting boring so I found smoked haddock today and it was really good, jack enjoyed it.

He cleared up and I got stuff ready for school. I also looked at nail designs as I plan to do my usual sunday night pamper, so hair oil, hair mask, face mask, nails. I have more time to do it without Oz too. So thats my night once my exercises are over. Must say I can not be arsed! I was gonna do 3 videos but I did a walk so I will just do 2 videos I think. Need to get through school no point in killing myself off before the week start!

Tomorrow is school, not staying at mums after school I need to get back and do my meatballs, so I will collect Oz and come straight home. School should be quiet

reached 5kg mark!

 Evening

I managed 3 exercise videos last night and had a bath which was really nice, I then put a face sheet on, laid on the floor with the massagers doing my calves. It was good. and thats how Jack found me XD

He had the bath after me then we watched inuyasha and went to bed at 11pm

I slept well cus I was dead! But I woke up at 6am then just before 8am. I decided to weigh myself, I thought I hadnt lost anything but I had just got my numbers wrong. I had in fact lost almost a kilogram in a week. But I am not surprised with how much I have been to the toilet this week. So i probably wont be able to keep the weight off, it will be back next week! but it did mean I had reached the 5kg mark! so in my diet so far I have lost 5.2kg in 2 months. Im happy with that. I do look and feel so much better my tummy is a lot flatter and toned and my legs aint so flabby.  I got ready and went to mum's for 9:15am I walked over and it was so chilly!

she made me a cup of tea and we sat with the girls on our laps. The men were out the house so it was just us two and I think mum appreciated that. We just sat and chatted really. I left at 10:40am as the carpet lady was coming at 11am

I got back and she did come at 11am

she brought so many samples!!! we talked together whilst she measured our house. We want almost the whole house doing. It is cheaper to do it all the same colour - to have it all off the same roll. So we are gonna do that as its flooring, we're not that arsed. But ours looks gross and the underlay has totally gone so theres no padding to it anymore. Its just hard cheap carpet.

Me and jack chose the most expensive of everything! he was happy to go with it. It worked out the same price to have the whole house done with premium than to have different colours in each room with lower quality. the underlay we have gone expensive too as it preserves the carpet. She is going to do us a quote and get back to us. she talked to us about our porch as I said Id like it redoing and she said shes happy to do it but our floor where it meets the wall isnt 90c its like curved and thats why our current crappy carpet doesnt sit flush with the wall. she said if we chisel it away and make it 90c she will happily do it. so we chose flooring for that just in case we can actual chisel our concrete floor. job for the easter holidays! we  booked to have our carpet june 2nd I believe. but see what the quote comes back at yet.

I had lunch as soon as she left as I was hungry! then I had a sleep as my body was just tired.

I woke up and was hungry and tired. i had nothing in the house tho. we went out to B&M and got a few bits, i got some nuts. We went B&Q and got garage paint. I went with light bluey purple as I think it will look good with the design in mind. but also the bedroom above has grey curtains with stars on it which will look good with it all, the bedroom next to it - my craft room - will have blue walls so it will all look good together

we came home and i snacked on my nuts then did dinner as i was hungry

dinner poisoned me, i was in a ball with stomach pain for half hour

now I am back with Oz, before dinner he came in and got food outta us now hes frisking me again for sodding treats and food! its pure harassment! I brought a couple of skin care things online

I will do my exercises shortly as well then have a bath. not sure what I will do afterwards as I will have to wait for Jack to finish with harvey and theo. He asked me to talk to them but I might be too tired for that by then.

tomorrow

I am doing our weekly shop then coming back and unpacking, hopefully getting done for 10am for when Mia comes over and we go for a dog walk, just hope the weather isnt as cold.

then I will come back and make my fish soup for the week, clean Oz out whilst it cooks, then have soup for lunch. Clean the bathroom. Then at 4pm I am going over to mum's with Oz to have a brew with her and maybe the pigs. I will leave Oz with her then, saves me a job monday morning. then dinner I guess

Just 4 more days to go

 Evening

Last night Jack finished at 9pm with harvey and theo which I was rather glad about as I felt like I squinting just to keep my eyes open, so we watched inuyasha and went to bed. We were in bed for 9:45pm I told jack to leave me alone, I was comfy so I didnt want to be touched and I had nothing else to give so I didnt want to talk or listen. Did not take long for me to fall asleep. The alarm was needed. I'd had a horrible dream that I had gone to have the covid vaccine, I am dreading that needle. Just cus I keep seeing people around me have it and are quite poorly for a day or two. I hate needles and I hate being more poorly than I am now! But I know realistically its the lesser of two evils....

School was very quiet for me. I got all my work done, all my printing and I managed to read a chapter of my body book too :)

Mum sent a nice picture of Oz playing outside next to the girls. I must take some photos off my phone but I have been using my laptop downstairs for 2 weeks now, my cables are all upstairs at my desk. My desk that must be collecting dust now! 

She said she had made too many cookies (no such thing) and that she has some for Jack. She said "im sorry so ill give you some strawberries!". I offered to come collect Oz but she said she hadnt been out the house today so she wanted to come over for a change of scenery.

We finished school and a science teacher gave us cake from his birthday. i said I was on a diet so didnt take any. So jack has been given birthday cake and home made cookies today >.> 

We got home to find mum had just arrived, we had tea with her and Ozwald. I had my strawberries.

for dinner it was left over stew thank god as I was too tired to do anything. Mum said I looked a bit pale. After food I fell asleep on the sofa, with Oz in the room >< Jack had gone to game but i think I was only napping for half hour. Jack is playing dungeons and dragons online but says he should be done 9pm. I died on the toilet whilst Oz was alone and he was on the computer.  Dont know what had upset my stomach now, honestly this diet doesnt feel worth it at times!

Mum had brought her scales over, i usually use on a saturday or sunday morning but i thought i might not have chance for my 'weekly weigh in' time so she let me borrow them. I was suppose to be going for a walk with mia tomorrow morning but she forgot i have the carpet lady coming and arranged something else so shes coming over on sunday. So tomorrow i will go to mums - typically she needn't have brought the scales - and then come home at 11am for the carpet lady. Have lunch and do whatever really. I havent actually planned my weekend! Sunday I will see mia in the morning then do my chores I guess. Hopefully I will get some rest time over the weekend. I need it.

Only 4 more school days to go before we break up for 2 weeks for easter~ 

Bit stressed in new carrying case

 Evening

I managed 2 chloe ting videos last night and had a good bath afterwards, it was just the perfect temperature somehow. Jack had it after me and enjoyed it too. We watched Inuyasha and went to bed. I was so done. The alarm was much needed XD

This morning Oz travelled in his new carrying case, he was abit stressed in it and was scurrying the sides. but its because it was new he will get use to it. I had put it in the living room for him to play with yesterday but he wasnt interested. So I tried to show it him but he wasnt arsed >.>

I had died on the toilet that morning ether which was nice! I kept food in for a change!

I have still been peeing a fair bit tho today.

School for me was better as I didnt feel as drained as I had done all week. I mean i still didnt feel 100% by far but felt better than what I did. I had an easy day. But then everyone kept handing me stuff to print T^T and julia and jack needed a lot printed too so I volunteered to do it as I set the printers going, stay there and just keep taking finished work out every so often and topping it up with paper. I was reading my body book between all that. I had a good lunch. I struggled with the heating being broken -_____- I had my coat on most of the day! Just so damn cold, what with the doors and windows open....

We left on time and jack and julia was grateful I had done all their printing. I had also printed out 29 A3 sheets of paper with an outline of a wolf on it, I plan to selloptape it together and then cut it like a stencil and maybe stencilling it onto my garage door - when I have painted it. Our house directly faces the close/street when you pull into it so it would be good if i could make it look decent. I have the ability to artist I will use this ability!

I went to pick Oz up, jack had a tea with mum but I thought I would wait and have one at home with pain killer as mum didnt have any fruit teas in i like. we only stayed for half hour. Oz was a bit stressed coming home and weed in the carrying case which isnt like him so I had that to quickly clear up as we came home. It was only in the carrying case but I wanted to get it up before it soaked through.

We got on with dinner, I had omelette and chips. mum gave me some chicken she cooked on tuesday so i had that with my dinner, jack had junk food out the freezer. He is playing with Harvey and Theo tonight. I am just with Ozwald, he isnt doing much now hes found all the treats jack hid for him.

i will do my 2 video work outs which is only 30mins but its enough then grab a bath.

Tomorrow is friday. Thank bloody god. Need a break!

New carrying case for Oz

 Evening

I managed 1 exercise video yesterday as its only 10 mins long and requires sitting down. I went for a shower afterwards as I had had enough of being hot so I didnt fancy a hot bath

Me and jack were early sitting down so watched 2 episodes of Inuyasha then went to bed. I would have gone to bed after 1 episode but felt i wouldnt have been able to sleep at 9:15pm

I woke up at 6am needing a wee, as it actually hurt. And my god it went on for ages, made my eyes water XD So then as it was early I pounced on jack and woke him up, he asked for 5 more minutes but i told him we needed to get the stew on anyway so he got up. It was a good job we were up early as my stomach decided to rebel. So 3rd day in a row I am stuck on the toilet dying. I havent digested food properly for 3 days now. Shattered!

We took Oz over to mum's and went to school

School, I just wasnt feeling it again. I could have quite easily have not turned up. I just felt so tired and drained. I couldnt think straight and just wasnt in the mood for it all.

I spent a lot of time on the floor ether resting or reading. Ether way  I dont feel I have pulled my weight but Jack told me not to worry as I had prepped all my lessons. I sat at the end of the day painting. School finished at 1:50pm so teachers could get home to do their online parents evenings. I asked jack if we too finished at 1:50pm but no such luck. However he did let us go home 15mins early as no one was in school.

Mum very kindly brought Oz over and a lot of packages for me! 2 skirts for work and Oz's new carry case. Its too good for that spoiled bunny! But it should be a lot more easier to carry him in it as its more flexible and a bit smaller. I have let him sniff it and put treats in it but he simply stretched inside and grabbed the treats without actually going in it >.>

We had a brew with mum and then mum left so I could serve up my thai stew at like 5pm XD I get earlier with dinner but its because I am hungry and I dont have much to snack on other than fruit.

I sat with the massager after dinner and left the clearing up to jack.

I am now just sitting with Oz, hes happy boy but also quite lazy XD 

I might do a bit of exercising in a bit then have a bath or shower, I shall see how I feel.

I can not believe how much I have peed today. I went for a wee 8 times at work thats like once and hour! and im just the same at home! whats up with me! I would be interested to see how much water i  have shed today especially given that massive wee this morning. I had no idea I could hold so much water. Wonder if I have lost any more weight this week.

Tomorrow is school, same old really. Nothing of interest going off.

In the garage all night

 Evening

I managed my exercises last night, then had a quick bath as I had stomach ache and didnt want to need the toilet whilst naked! 

I sat with Jack watching Inuyasha I had asked him to come off his games with harvey and theo at 9:30pm as I was just so tired, so we were in bed early

Jack went to go release Oz in the morning, but turns out i had left his side door open so he was sat happily in the middle of the garage floor once jack opened up the garage. lord knows what hes been up to all damn night >.>

This morning I just felt off, and had to get rid of my stomach twice before leaving the house, the stomach I had last night had chose before school to strike me not once but twice. Making us late for school but only by a few minutes as luckily traffic was on our side. I did feel drained after it all tho

School I just wasnt feeling it and was making so many stupid mistakes like going to photocopy something and not taking the sheet i was gonna photocopy with me! stupid annoying things like that. I had stomach pains like burning and i was just tired and achy and would have happily have spent the day in bed. I did all that I needed to in the morning, died under my desk before lunch, ate lunch then sat reading my body book for the rest of the afternoon. Couldnt wait to go home. Just had  enough. so tired

mum kindly brought Oz over to me, he had been sleeping all day in shed, girls were outside but Oz chose to sleep in the shed -_____- He laid inside with us whilst we had a brew. Once mum went I had my leftovers for dinner and jack had my soup which he said was really good ^^

afterwards we did a few house jobs, i made him do more than me tho as I am so tired.

I am with Oz now who has just been snoring in his hay basket >.> what a bloody life. Im sure he's tired cus hes been up all night in that garage you know. Thank god its safe and locked up. I normally check his doors and for whatever i slacked off last night. I will be more on it. But hes safe in garage. Hes probably been loving it

I dont think I will do my exercises tonight. I might do the 10 min thigh burn as i think i can manage that. Then I will go wash the sheer amount i have sweated today from all the hot sweats I have had.

feel quite disgusting if i am honest! Jack was suppose to play with harvey and theo but i had said could he come off at 9:30pm but theo wont get home from the outdoor gym til almost 8pm then hes got to eat so realistically jack will only have an hour with them so he said its not worth it and he wont bother.

we will have an early night ^^ i am not gonna argue that. just so shattered and drained.

tomorrow

school and in the morning we have the job of getting the stew on, always a mad dash on stew day!

other news

my cousin, born Sarah, is now Remi

she has officially and legally had her name changed. So she can be more 'gender fluid' 

gonna be so weird next time i see her not to call her sarah. Just hope shes happy about it and doesnt regret it in later life.

4th thing i've missed out on damn it

 Konbanwa~~~

I was tired after my work out last night, but stuck to doing just 2 videos, I had a bath and did a full pamper session of body scrub, hair mask, face pack. Yup the bath water was grim! I did galaxy nails too

I fell asleep pretty fast, I woke up 10mins before my alarm and tried to sleep for those few remaining precious minutes but I needed a wee >.> so i got up

We dropped Oz off at mums, when I was taking him from Jack's lap I saw how much fur he left behind, think he is starting to shed his fur. Therefor his new carrying case - when it arrives - will be a godsend as he can travel in that and shed his coat all over my car interior!! Also if he travels with that he has the option of who brings him home - me or mum.

School was ok, it was easy biology wise, and i did go hid out in chris's office a couple of times as he was by himself all day and all week in fact. I did help julia with a massive sorting job it took me like 2 hours which is quite depressing as half the students i know wont look at what i have sorted out to give them. revision material for exams. Id be grateful but hey im 16 and know better XD

I was quite tired and achy tho, my stomach had been off in the morning and it left me with stomach pains and sicky feeling. I did get to have an actual cup of tea tho as someone had baked brownies in science over the weekend and kindly brought them in, so thats the 4th thing ive missed out on in less than a week! sod this im having a tea! which i enjoyed ^^

Mum txt to say she had been over to my house and collected Oz's carrying case and she would bring him over to us! it was really nice of her to do it :D

so when we got home mum arrived about 2 mins later, she sat and had a brew with us. Oz had treats inside whilst we had tea.

Mum left so i could do dinner which was burger and chips. everything hand made of course. jack, who usually cuts up the sweet potato for me was taking an age in the bathroom so i cut it up and banged it in the oven then made the burgers which came out ok. I grilled cheese on top of jack's burger ^^

I let him do all the clearing and washing up I was done I needed a break. I sat with the massagers for 15mins on my back which was nice and needed, then the 15mins on my calves killed me and hurts to walk now!

Jack came sat with me whilst I looked for birthday gifts for my dad which is less than a month away. Think I have sorted now. Then he went to game so I got my Oz out. He has frisked me for every snack and treat going, and is still hungry so I will take him home soon hes been with me an hour now.

Then I will crack on with my exercises I guess. Only doing 2 videos I think tonight but its still a good 30min work out. Don't wanna wear myself out for the rest of the week of work :/

School tomorrow

not got much going off again at school really, its revision mainly so nothing in the way of practicals 

Good thing is Julia made it into work today after her covid jab yesterday so i am sure she will be in tomorrow also :)

mum and dad survived the covid jab

 Evening

I was so done last night, I dont feel like  I was paying much attention to inuyasha I was just ready for my bed! I slept really well and needed my alarm to wake me for the food shop. We got there on time tho and the shop wasnt too bad, its nice to be in and out like ninjas.

On the way home I called in at mum's gave her a hug and handed her some roses for being so brave with her covid vaccination and she looks after Oz she was very happy, then I got back in the car

We came back and unpacked then sat with Oz inside with a brew, hes been in loads today XD

Jack helped me cut stuff up for my soup which I then left bubbling, I went to clean Oz out, he loves being cleaned out X3 I came in and finished my soup then had that with jack for lunch.

After lunch I cleaned the bathroom then we filled out the census thing everyone has got to do, then we went for a good walk. 

I got back and was exhausted, it was 2:45pm and I brought Oz in and had a tea with him. We then had Oz snoring on the floor, Jack played his switch and I fell asleep curled in Jack's dressing gown. And thats where we stayed for an hour! Its like the 3 of us were just done XD

I took Oz home and started to do some dinner, we had fresh salmon and chips like every sunday. But I flavoured it different and it was damn good!

jack cleared up whilst I sat with the massager and then he had a go with it, bloody brilliant.

I got my stuff ready for school tomorrow, new uniform! and new cardigan!!! ^^ 

Currently I have my Ozwald in, he has had so many treats today, so much fuss and a lot of time inside with us but I love spending time with him and just watching him ^^

I was gonna do some drawing or painting today but I ran out of energy hence the sleep earlier! so i am a bit disappointed I didnt get anything creative done today but I got some done yesterday I guess.

I will take Oz home soon and do my work out, promised jack I would only do 2 out the 3 as I am quite tired and we did a good walk.

Then I plan to do face packs and hair packs :D and my nails. I like having a pamper before my grind of work for the week.

tomorrow is work :/

Julia has had her covid vaccination today and she says she feels ok so far but she will let us know how she feels tomorrow if shes coming in, a lot of people have been poorly with it. Luckily my mum and dad seem to be doing ok. Just have sore arms. I really really dont want to go and have it!!! but it will be a way off yet.

so hopefully we have julia tomorrow or me and Jack have quite a bit of chemistry to do!

Got all my jobs at mum's done

 Evening

I did my work out yesterday did all 3 videos which I think takes it to 40mins, i was exhausted and a bit dizzy from it all and so i had a warm bath not a hot one as  i didnt want to push things!

After my bath, jack had the bath and it was quite late by the time we sat down to inuyasha so i was in bed for 11pm, I woke up at 6:30am thinking "god no" then 7:30am thinking "nah"

it got to 8:30am and I got up as I didnt want to waste the day and I was seeing mia at 9;30am, she turned up on time and we went to take the dogs for a walk which was nice as the weather wasnt too bad.  It was good to have a female to talk to as well.

I got back and didnt bother taking my shoes off as I went straight over to mum's

I got there and had an actual cup of tea with her which was amazing

I did my weekly weigh in which I was pleasantly surprised to see I was back at what I was 2 weeks 64.2kg, not complaining as long as its coming off slowly. 

then I got to work!

I cut the guinea's claws and they were all squealing at me even tho i didnt nick any of them. mardy sows today they were.

 I then Did my brother's hair. we are still unable to get a hair cut and my brother's has gotten so long he cant do anything with it. So I took jack's clippers over to the side then i cut and blended the top for him. I have given him a cracking hair cut, it doesnt even look like a home job. mum was impressed and he was grateful

Then I had my lunch which i took over

then I did my mum's nails i did a nice spring design on them for her. she was pleased with them, once they had dried a bit i dyed her eyebrows for her as she had tried the other day and hadnt managed it

Then I finally was able to sew my new uniform! I added lace along the bottom and a small yellow bow on the back, simple and cute~

my massager arrived 30min before I left so I let each of my family have a go they were impressed, mum and my brother want one XD

it was nice to spend time with mum and my brother. They appreciated my hard efforts

i came home and a bit of a rest with jack and Oz

then I went outside with Oz to paint my garage door which I have managed to do! took me 40 mins but looks good i took a photo. i got quite cold in just a t-shirt tho.

I came in to thaw out, we watched an episode of black cat and then I laid on my bed for 40mins as I had exhausted myself. 

I did the dinner, we ate that and then Jack cleaned up whilst I sat, I got Oz out and went on my laptop whilst he had a big wash. I have managed to buy a new carry case for him! its been used once and I got it for £14.30! instead of £30-£40 they seem to be. So thats good ^^ also bought another skirt, its white with cherries on :3 I bought a bralette as well.

Now I am still with Oz an hour later! I will take him home shortly as I need to do my exercises. I can see the start of a 6 pack! Jo is getting stronger and more toned! I am trying and I am still enjoying it but I know I want to tone more or lose more. Not happy yet. But it is nice being able to look in the mirror at myself once again :)

Then I will bath and sit with jack later to watch inuyasha

I have had a productive day today tho :) Jack has done all the chore I have asked of him.

I need to upload photos on to my diary but I keep bringin my laptop downstairs so I can sit with Oz and do my diary.

Tomorrow is chore day

I have the weekly shop to do in the morning, Oz to clean out, soup for the week to make, bathroom to clean. then I have the rest of the day to do as I wish :3

Menopausall? blood test for 9 things

 Evening

I was in bed for 10:30pm, absolutely dead, I also slept like the dead 

before I did my exercises tho, I was stuck on the toilet for 40mins feeling like i was gonna be sick. To be honest I wasnt sure which end it was gonna come out of. I stripped off as I was covered in sweat. 

I couldnt be bothered to get up this morning, still half asleep

We dropped Oz off in his carrying case. His carrying case is 20 years old as it was mum's friends case before I had my first rabbit back in 2005 I am thinking of buying a nicer LITER one as we use it 5 days a week now. Oz's is hard to do up and heavy. but served its purpose as I originally used it just to take my rabbit vets once a year for a vaccination. So I will look for another but they are not cheap!

At work I did some printing in the morning. It was only 8:45am and I had same sensation as last night of going hot and feeling very sick. Like when you get shed loads of saliva in your mouth. I tried to talk myself out of it but then my legs went weak so i rang jack saying "i dont feel well" he came with julia a few seconds later. they helped me back to the prep room. where I tried to recover. it got to 11am and I had done nothing. I couldnt get off the floor as i couldnt raise my blood pressure. My heart was going out of rhythm and i felt dizzy every time i sat up. I was useless.

i started to feel better after lunch. jack had been giving me sitting down tasks but after lunch i was able to stand up and help julia. I soon felt tired again tho. I was very very frustrated

I got home and mum kindly brought Oz round for me :)  I was happy to see my lad

I sat having a cup of tea with mum, she offered not to stay and to go home but shes gone to the trouble of having Oz then bringing him over, i can sit and have a tea with her.

I soon had to go to the doctors tho >.>

last week getting diagnosed by the nurse with asthma, she said she thought i was starting the menopause, so today i went to see the doctor like she told me too. he didnt seem concerned and seemed to think its my mental health....my mental health causes night sweats? load of bull.

however he is testing me for the menopause. I have to come off my pill for 6 weeks tho. as my hormones need to reset. He is testing me for a total of 9 things. thats gonna be a lot of blood ><

not looking to it but hey its 6 weeks away

i came home with Jack and i rang my mum and ranted to her about it. Jack over heard and came to see me when i was off the phone and said "so from what i over heard, i have tonight to bang you then im back on porn am i?" i laughed and told him he is terrible. he said he would be using big boob and big butt porn as i cant provide that....i laughed. he did it on purpose. men are pigs XD

so yeah thats where i am with that!

we had food then I helped do a few things then got Oz in. I need to take him home in a sec and do my exercises. I would like to do some form of exercise even tho i am tired.

tomorrow

ahhh tomorrow a day of doing whatever i like!

however....

my brother wants his hair cut as he says its a mop and cant get it cut for at least another month cus of lock down. my mum wants her eye brows dying and maybe nails done. the sows want their claws clipped. I want to go over and sew lace on my new uniform! do something for myself! but it will be nice to see them. I want to paint the rabbit silhouette on my garage back door. I am also seeing mia at 9:30am for a dog walk! so nice productive day I guess~

shiatsu massager

 Evening

I managed my exercises and was in bed for 9:45pm I was just done!

I slept so deeply and needed my alarm and couldnt seem to wake up, almost fell asleep again. Which isnt like me.

All day I feel like I have had no energy and just plain drained

found work really difficult

but what did make me happy was head of biology brought in this plug in shiatsu massager she got for her back this week for me to have a go with. it was friggin amazing!! i just sat there in a trance and she left it with me today so i used it 3 times. i felt things click on my back and i put it on my claves which hurt and they have hurt since, they must have been tight!

Head of science brought krispy kremes in today, doughnuts for all. all but jo

I missed out on cadbury chocolates on tuesday

chocolate bars on wednesday

doughnuts today!!

life is so damn cruel T^T

head of science said "Jo make sure you grab a doughnut!"

i said "im on a diet, its well skank"

he said "Jo make sure you grab a doughnut, then put it back" >.>

he told us at the end of the day for jack to take my doughnut home, so jack is having it for breakfast.

mum kindly brough Oz over for us as I was so tired. she wasnt gonna stay for a tea but jack insisted, kinda good job as i would have just fell asleep on the bed then i wouldnt have slept tonight.

just so tired

havent done much to be honest, i tried on a 'large' skirt a brought online that came today, i could get it on but it was quite indecent XD the new bra fits but i cant totally fill it T^T

jack used our 2 £5 vouchers head of science gave us the other month to buy a massager from amazon and we got it for £24 in total as there was an offer on too!!! Jo is very happy :D he had a go with it today and was sold, but most of all he saw how happy i was with it XD

gonna do my exercises now

but jack has put his foot down and doesnt want me doing loads

so i compromised and said i would only do 2 out the 3 exercise videos

so i shall start those!

tomorrow is finally friday

feels like it should have been friday today! ><

just another day x 1000

 Evening

I managed the work out again last night, think i did the moves a bit better but still took me a minute to get my head round some of the moves. I had a bath afterwards then Inuyasha then bed.

I slept pretty well again :)

This morning we were a bit late leaving as we had the stew to put on and we hadnt allowed enough time for it basically, I did last week but not this week. Took tired last night XD

School was ok, I was struggling for breath on a few occasions simply from anxiety and tight chest and running around. I used the inhaler a couple of times. I got my 2 practicals done and dusted and I will fully clear them up tomorrow as the last class made such a mess of my equipment i couldnt face clearing it up. I did other bits and pieces like once again cleaning up the prep room, with Jack busy I was able to through out a fair amount of junk. So it is looking better in places.

We left on time and jack drove us home, mum was already home and waiting for us :) we had a cup of tea with her and Oz played in the garden.

Didnt have to do much with dinner apart from cook a yorkshire pudding for jack that was it, clearing up took longer!

Just with my Ozwald who is happy bun bun

I will do my exercises once again and bath and inuyasha and bed, the routine. It is helping me to sleep tho I have to say.

Tomorrow is school, feels like it should be a friday but its only thursday :(

arse ache

 Evening 

I can confirm I have arse ache!

I was in bed for 10pm I was so tired and grateful that we were in bed early. I decided to lay next to jack, usually I lay close to him but last night i was on his side of the bed whilst he played on his switch. When I fall asleep I tend to turn away from jack and go to my side of the bed but not this time, I stayed facing him and on his side! I had literally dropped off in like 2 mins jack said, I was just done I think! but I didnt move away even whilst asleep, so I ended up waking up caked in sweat from being so close to jack, jack had also gotten hot and had next to no room on the bed so didnt sleep well. I said "why did you wake me or push me?" he said "cus waking you isnt good, you ache and stuff and you were cute so i let you sleep"

This morning we dropped my Ozwald off for day care he's had another nice day, mum sent me a photo of Oz on top of the girls run whilst they were in it XD

School was ok, I only had 1 practical and it went well because its probably the most easiest one I ever do for A-level! but i helped out in class anyway. I did a fair amount of cleaning up in the prep room as well cus it was getting messy and getting on my nerves.

I napped on my lunch break tho which was much needed. I sorted out my new mangastudio too.

Came home and got Oz mum had him ready for me to collect she had sat with him on the sofa fussing him for 10mins then passed him to me when I arrived, I appreciate her having him, hes not alone and get fuss and looked after. Instead of being in a cage all day. We didnt call in for a tea cus I needed to get back to do dinner which was hard work, i had windows open, back door open, tshirt on it was only 12c today but doesnt stop me sweating buckets. I had sweat running down my face whilst I ate my dinner. Just grim isnt it. 

We had loads of pots to do after dinner, chores to do as well. God its 7:15pm and not stopped since I walked in the house 3 hours ago. knackered. Just with Oz now inside bless him.

Tomorrow is school and mum is gonna bring Oz over here for when we finish school so i wont need to collect him and she can have a brew here

tonight i plan on doing the same exercises i did yesterday

3 videos totalling up to 40mins and i dont think i did them that well yesterday as i was getting to grips with the moves but got there and developed arse ache very soon after finishing! had arse ache all of today, shows it uses different muscles doesnt it. I want to keep going with it.

Bought new mangastudio! New work out challenge!

 Evening

I did my work out last night, I found it quite easy and I watched other people doing Chloe Ting videos whilst I worked out. Found that other people stopped losing weight and found the videos easier after time and the best solution is to do a different work out. So I found a 'inner thigh burn' video chloe does so tonight I plan to try that as I would like to lose weight from my legs and my waist. But I have been working my core so much and I am losing weight round there but I will mix it up a bit

I was so damn tired and couldnt wait for bed but Jack finished at 9:45pm gaming so he was down before I had gotten out the bath, I felt it was late by the time I had gotten off to sleep tho, it was pass 11pm and I was just aching. I woke up to my alarm and felt ok about the day

However I have been suffering mentally all day, almost like I havent had my medication. Not to mention I was aching, work stressed me out as I couldnt think straight and didnt know where to start, I got a bit upset simply out of frustration. But jack talked me through it all

I took extra pain relief and I did get on with my day, I had had enough and couldnt wait to go home. I drove us home. Jack drove this morning and did very well.

I got to mum's and mum and jack had a brew I had fruit salad mum had made. We sat with Oz who had had a nice day as usual. Then we came home and Jack started to put the new mangastudio - clipart paint on to my laptop as I have decided to go with it and purchase it. Move on with the times, he then tried to get my preferred settings on to it but I dont have time tonight to have a play with it to see if its all how I like it. But hopefully it works ok, and he paid for it ^^

we had dinner and now I am just getting up the new chloe work outs i am gonna try out. Trying 2 different work outs then 1 of my usual work outs, makes up the same time of 40mins.

Im gonna sit with Oz now then do the work out then bath, the usual. Im sick of this anxious feeling tho so im hoping I will work it out my system.

Tomorrow is school

told mum I am not stopping after school I want to get back and make my dinner as its meatballs and they take time.

Mother's day and how to pee off your in-laws

 Evening

I slept pretty well last night and woke up just before  my alarm we got up and got ready for the weekly big shop. I decided to let jack fully drive today. So he drove to the shops and parked up, I also made him put fuel in the car, drive to the hardware shop and park up and drive home he did very well.

We went to B&Q where we spent £150 on house stuff, we brought fence paint! We have gone for red!!! none of the usual wood colours XD I got wallpaper for my craft room and wall filler and then i went to look at colours. There was a random shelf of reduced paint and I saw colour I really like called Miami sky its basically really light blue like pale blue white. Not a colour I thought I would go for to be honest! I had pink or purple in mind, but very light ether way as I want it to be a light room. It was reduced by a lot at well from £18 to £7 so yeah we picked the last 2 tins up

we came back and unpacked the shopping and then I was gonna work out but it was just too late so we sat down and had a brew with Oz and then I did my soup for the week - gone with such an amazing fish soup recipe I made up that it looks more like a freakin stew than soup! should keep me quiet anyway as I am always hungry on this diet!

We had lunch then Jack got to work on the list of chores I set him for the day as he chose to do them today instead of yesterday whereas I did most of mine yesterday. I had a bit of rest as I wasnt feeling today just mentally and physically exhasuted. But I got up and cleaned the bathroom after jack had a shower.

Then cus he thought "i have finished my chores, game now!" he went and gamed. It was 3pm and I told him I would like to go over to mum's between 4-5pm as I had things to actually do over there.

It got to 4pm and he said "Oh no i havent rang my mum!" so that was it then he was on the phone for 45mins!! cus he had chosen to game instead of ringing his mum to say Happy Mother's day!!!! so that made me late to see my mum cus he thought of games first once again instead of life. Whats worse is he was planning out a game that isnt starting til next friday!!!!

So I was a bit peeved with him as I didnt get to do stuff with my mum I wanted to do. 

Mum had asked me why I was late and I said "cus someone forgot to ring their mum and played games instead.

Mum loved her gifts, she opened them whilst we had a cup of tea and sat with oz as I took him over.

We had dinner, me jack sat in the living room watching cats does countdown and mum and dad sat in the kitchen. We were suppose to having pudding but it was getting close to 7pm - when jack's gaming starts and time I said we would be home by. I said to him "do whatever you need to do whatever you want to do, whats more important to you. Its your weekend"

and with that, he went home. Yup one way to not look good in front of your in-laws, to leave before pudding to go play games...

mum kinda didnt expect anything else really and dad said it was rude. I had to then justify it, saying "i had told him to game originally as we were gonna be home for 7pm but because he was late ringing his mum it made us late"

I sat and painted mum's nails for her she likes the design ^^ I was suppose to do some sewing and dye her  eye brows but time didnt allow.

So I left Oz there and came home as I have stuff to do! so i came home at 7:30pm having eating the fruit salad with my parents we had for pudding.

Came home and started cooking my turkey for breakfast for the week, something I usually do when cooking dinner but obviously didnt cook tonight and forgot about my breakfast! glad I remembered tho otherwise that would have been bad! I packed my lunch for the morning and doing my diary whilst its all cooking, then I have my exercises to do then a bath >< ahhhh so much to do! and I said I would paint my nails but dont have a design in mind!

tomorrow

is school, I feel like I will be busy and have chemistry to take part in >< but i am sure I will get the day done somehow.

My own uniform style

 evening

I slept pretty well, I woke up at 7:15am and thought "nah" and went back to sleep next thing I knew it was 8:30am! so i woke up and said "need to get Oz out" so jack got up and went to do that for me whilst I just died on the toilet, which i ended up doing a further two times that morning -_____-

I was suppose to be going for a walk with mia but it started to hammer it down at 9am so we txt one another saying we will see if it clears up

in the mean time after breakfast i decided to go have a brew with my mum for an hour

but half hour in at 10:30am mia rang me asking if i wanted to go a walk with her as it had stopped raining, i told her that I would be home at 11am i was just having a brew with mum

i took mum's mother's day gifts over for tomorrow and i weighed my self and I was 65.1kg! i had put on a kilogram! but weirdly I feel i have lost weight in areas! the weight round my ribs is going so my bras no longer feel tight and are marking me as badly. some still are marking me so work needs to be done. my stomach looks more refined as well as my legs. Maybe I am retaining water or maybe its muscle?

I left mum to get home and find mia had arrived, so I grabbed my hat and coat from inside and went for a walk with her which was really nice ^^ the wind was so strong and cold tho >< she told me shes had her covid vaccination what with being a dental nurse she was able to get it! she said she felt like she had flu for 24 hours then she was fine. hopefully see her next weekend :)

I came home shouting to jack "i love you now feed me! Im hungry! feed me!

he came off his computer saying "yes yes lets get you some food" >.> 

we had lunch then I dusted the bedroom and living room whilst Oz was inside then I decided to do my work out which i found a bit difficult because i had done an hours walk but i managed it.

had a bath and then jack had it after me

I didnt do too much for a little bit as I was a bit tired and hungry but decided to make a start on my wooper canvas I told jack I would have a go doing just about drawn the outline.

I did the dinner as I was hungry

then I was on my laptop looking at new uniform clothes for school as yeah I like to have variation and also I was on and on and on at jack for months "can we have new uniform" as mine is 2nd or 3rd hand and 10 years old, im down to 2 tops a day as the rest have holes in. So before xmas he ordered shirts for me and they havent arrived, he emailed them and nothing came back so i have been asking and asking if he will call them but hey we are in march now! so i think I have been waiting a year for new uniform now, so in the end i have ordered blue polo shirts off ebay. same colour and grade as what i have now just wont have the school logo on which i aint bothered about anyway as mine have the old logo on anyway! so yay new shirts that dont feel like sandpaper on my skin! and I also looked at new skirts and leg warmers for school. Got to keep my usual style. last week 2 people commented on me saying "you look like an anime character" "you look like a japanese character" yup

jack says i use the term "uniform" loosely XD but i dont like blending in with everyone. I like my style and all my clothes and style is different. 

I am about to go upstairs to go on mangastudio a bit and talk with harvey and theo as jack has been asking all week that i join them. then we will watch inuyasha and go bed!

tomorrow

weekly shop time! then I have soup to make and Oz to clean out, bathroom to clean, then in the evening we are going over to mum and dad's to have dinner as it is mothers day and as no one can do anything in lock down mum invited us over for dinner :) she doing everyone sponge and custard for pudding and shes doing me a fruit salad ^^

completed my first week back~

 Otsukararesama deshita~

I managed 3 of my exercise videos and actually did really well and enjoyed myself! To say how dead I was feeling, did surprise me!

I had a hot bath then watched Inuyasha with jack and went to bed, he plays his switch in bed which I dont mind and seem to fall asleep to.

We got a call from chris before we set off for work, he asked if we can pick the DT technician up as funny enough he lives 3 streets from us. It was no trouble and he waiting at the end of our road luckily, so that meant less time in the car for Ozwald. He was like "what you got there!?" as Oz was in his carrying case. I told him that my mum had Oz during the day X3

Today was hectic like mega hectic. Julia was back tho and it was the first time this week the 3 of us had actually been able to work together!

i spent my whole morning with those heart....opening their vacuum packed bags up, draining the blood, placing the head sized hearts into trays for lessons, bagging individual ones up for the freezer, cleaning down, getting the lesson prepped.

When 3rd lesson came round and it was Luke doing the prac i decided to stay and support him with it and the kids loved it. and I was able to wash the stuff up in the lab I was in and get it ready for the next lesson after lunch, I got it all ready and the next teacher asked if i was staying but I said I was on lunch. But I did in fact neck my lunch in 15mins and went up to help, got the stuff ready for the next class straight after.

I then had to get the hearts together and ask jack nicely to take them to the bins outside. as my god they were heavy. Each one weighed 3kg and I got threw 20 hearts...heavy trolley. 

we were 5mins late leaving, i havent even prepped monday but looks an easy day for me, julia has i think 6 practicals so I said I would help her with them.

We came home and mum was here with Oz, she let Oz into the garden as apparently he had done nothing pretty much all day >.> But he seemed happy. I managed to print out a silhouette of a rabbit at work ready to draw round then paint on my lime green door.

Mum stayed for a brew and stayed with us til 5pm when I told her I wanted my food. I was hungry and shaky and had to use the inhaler as I couldnt breathe properly.

had dinner and did feel better, was grateful it was just left over stew.

now just doing my diary, I will get my chunk out to play then maybe do my exercises again and have a bath then yeah see how I feel. Right now I feel shattered but I have managed to complete my first week back and exercise each day too. I hope I can keep this up

tomorrow 

I am seeing mia for a walk around 9am

then I plan to do all my many house hold chores

Ox hearts! and inhalers really work!

 Evening~~

I managed again 3 out of 4 exercise videos, bathed and then watched Inuyasha with Jack. Seems to be working for me. It was kinda nice yesterday as he kept me company whilst I exercised as he played on his switch and we talked, I talked when I could kinda thing XD

I slept well too :)

School was busy.....my god busy

I managed to talk to the nurse and get a badge to say I dont need to wear a mask. I can actually breathe whilst dashing to class! Its amazing!

I got a lot of work done but was running a bit low on energy before lunch. 

After lunch Jack and I went to go fetch hearts.

Hearts I had sourced myself - something Jack usually does for me. However I thought I would take the load off him and do it. I had chosen a butcher I knew where it was and that I could get parked outside.

I had had to chase the hearts up twice this week. But today they had arrived!

We went to get them and I could not believe my eyes. The size....they are huge!

Like the size of a football. Not even joking

thats because all they had been able to source was Ox hearts......dear god

we usually have pig or lamb and lamb hearts are tiny these are just unreal.

Putting them in the car, the guy helped us luckily as each tray weighed almost 30kg.

I waited in the car for jack he came back and looked shocked I said "you ok?"

he said "that cost £240"....my heart sank. I had found hearts but they had literally come with a price. We unusually pay 50p a heart and we got 27 hearts for £240...I felt sick. Jack didnt look happy. Even more unhappy as he couldnt remember his pin for his school bank card (its been so long since he's had to sue it!) so had to pay with his own money which he has got to claim back. 

I felt so responsible for what had happened and I wondered if jack was gonna be off with me

We pulled up at school and jack fetched a trolley and i helped take them to the prep room we had literally 3mins to get to the prep room before the kids come out of school! 

So i was out of breath and felt a bit panicky by the whole thing and started to shake and jack told me sit and he made me a tea and made sure I was ok, he gave me an inhaler which to my surprise actually does work when you cant breathe! i was shocked at how good they were I should have got checked out ages ago! i sat there shaky and shed a few tears. I think it was tiredness, shock and anxiety. 

Luckily that was all at 3pm so didnt have long, the science teachers were going mad by the size of these hearts, they had never seen Ox before. so they are excited. Jack chilled out and said all was well and not to worry. Problem was that they were too big for the fridge so we have left them with ice round them on a trolley as they will be used at 11am.

I said to jack I didnt feel well so he let us leave 5mins early and drove us home

I text mum to say I wasnt coming in I just wanted to get home, so she had Oz ready for me to scoop up

He came in our living room whilst I had a snack and a drink and pain killers, all trying to revive myself. I got there in the end. Made banana biscuits, made dinner which was pizza for jack and left overs for me - so dead easy.

Now I am gonna have Oz out and ring mum :)

tomorrow is school

Julia should be back!! 

Jo is asthmatic

 Evening

I managed to do 3 out of the 4 exercise videos last night.

I had a much needed bath and sat with Jack and watched Inuyasha and slept pretty well

we got up a bit earlier today at 6:15am as we needed to put the thai stew on but we managed

it was also raining, it had rained in the night too. I found Oz sitting out in the rain so I brought him inside for a warm and also so I wouldnt get muddy feet wiped down my uniform as believe me - he would

I put him in his carrying case and dropped him off at mum's we were a bit late leaving so I left his carry case door open and went to work leaving him in the box to come out into mum's garden, mum said it didnt take him long to hop out XD

School was busy

Julia wasnt in, having lost her sister in law only last night. 

We got a phone call from her at work this morning telling us where she had put a few lessons, wo told her not to rush back to work as we were ok, she said they were returning home today and that she would like to come to work on friday

My day was hectic, i was hungry a lot of the time and just running short on energy a lot of the time to be honest. Jack helped a lot and told me to sit quite a few times

Chris came and updated our computers, my hardrive is freaking massive. I could fit a few rabbits  in that thing XD he said it was so it could run photoshop easier. He also put up to date photoshop on it! I said "it would be amazing to have mangastudio5 on this baby" so that was it then, chris was looking at that and said "mangastudio has an offer on for 5 days...its £20" my god thats cheap!!! I about leapt out my seat but said "yeah but then I would need a graphics tablet"

we came to the conclusion that science department could pay for the software and then IT would pay for my graphics tablet *0* 

so I asked head of science nicely if i could have manga studio and he agreed as he knows how good I am on it XD and I said I could make displays and draw diagrams in the booklets - some are terrible.

so I found I graphics tablet i wouldnt mind having and sent it chris. so yeah Jo soon will be able to do art at school! like an actual dream! they look after me there ^^

we came home and mum was here with Oz, which is why he travelled in carrying case X3 so she could bring him here later. We had a brew and then I had doctors

It was confirmed I have asthma, so I was given 2 inhalers. Yet more stuff wrong with my body. I am gonna ask work if I can not wear a mask as I struggle so damn much with my breathing.

I talked to the nurse about my other issues and she said "it does sound like youre starting the menapause early, you need to see the doctor" so I  booked in to see him next week. Yeah Jo could be an old woman in disguise XD im not worried.

Got home and had our thai stew which was bloody amazing i loved it!

Just gonna sit with Oz, Jack has kindly got him in for me and yeah then I will do exercises, have a bath and go bed ><

tomorrow will be another hard day