4 days of withdrawal....

 Evening

Ahhh yesterday was a lot again ><

I woke up and felt really dizzy. I had woken up at midnight and ran to the toilet, spitting, as it was like I was gonna be sick. I wasn't tho. My record of not vomiting for 13 years remains!

Jack got up and offered me a drink and I fell back to sleep, but the morning I was worse. I was really dizzy. I couldn't even scroll on my phone as my brain couldnt keep up with the action without feeling dizzy. I was THAT bad.

I tried to go back to sleep after breakfast but laying down in bed turned my stomach over so I got up and literally did nothing. Nothing I could do.

Jack made me a cup of tea and as I sat there and drank it something dropped into my mind....

YOU'VE NOT HAD YOUR ANTIDEPRESSIANT FOR 4 DAYS

I have no idea where that thought came from, I gasped

Jack was like "whats up!?"

So I told him and he was like "ok....well we're gonna get that down you now then"

this was about 10am. By midday I felt loads better

I could not believe how much better I did feel. I wasn't 100% but certainly better

so strange tho, as usually with withdrawal I get shakey and cold sweats. I didn't have that. I was even in bed thinking "has any of meds change brands" (sometimes different brands of the SAME medication can not agree with you) but none had. Yet the thought of skipping medication didnt seem to have come into my mind >.> so so so stupid. what a stupid silly mistake to make. I could have been feeling loads better if I had just taken my meds normally.

What had happened was, I finished off a box of antidepressiants and my new box had got pushed to the back of the cupboard so my brain didnt think to grab it when I was autopilot doing my meds. Jack - who has suggested before - got me to write a list of my daily medications and stick it to the inside of the meds cupboard. He asked me to do it ages ago but I didnt want to. I didnt want to see it written down how much I take each day. I wouldn't want anyone else to see it. He said "it could be there for if you're too poorly to get up and sort the meds out yourself, I could do it for you" he's sweet. But I have never ever had anyone do that. I don't know how I feel about someone else doing my meds

but for the record I am currently on 16 prescribed drugs/tablets per day + 3 different supplements. 

fair amount isnt. My pain killers I could take one more in the morning if I wanted to, so really I could round it off to 20 pills a day XD

I used my day best I could I guess, I became able to look at a screen and not be dizzy so I emailed my cousin who loved her birthday present and birthday card I made her.

I did start to feel more myself so I started cleaning! I gave the bathroom a big clean as I never feel quite clean after work men have used my bathroom....a trait I get from my mother XD I also cleaned my welsh dresser ^^ It looks so shiny and ready for plush and figures :3

we had a bit of an early dinner as Jack was going out with harvey, alice (harvey's lady he's 'dating') theo and brandon. he was going over at 6pm and going out for drinks in the town harvey lives in. I was invited but I didnt want to go out for drinks.

So I dropped Jack off at Harveys

I then called in at mum's and sat with her and dad in the garden whilst they had their dinner. My brother valetted my car 0.0 its never been so clean! It is very clean...he didnt need to. I was very grateful. I have got to clean the inside to finish it off. 

I left there and came home for a quick bath then had Oz who thinks its quite fun to go running out the living room and into other rooms since the carpet has been laid -_____- it is cute tho XD as his tail wags when he runs back to the living room as he knows hes getting up to no good and its all a game to him. I popped him home as he had made himself quite warm

I still had a bit of time before 10pm when i would have to go for Jack so I set off for the shops near Harveys and picked up a few groceries nothing special. I went to pick Jack up

I waited in the carpark for him and he came walking up to my car and I greeted him out the car and by his smile I thought "he's ether VERY happy or very DRUNK"

yup Jack was drunk

he was off his face

in those 4 hours he had consumed 3/4 of a bottle of vodka to himself....and he hasnt really been drinking in over a year. he obviously has the odd one in the week but nothing like that....

he was off his face. It was amusing but also - I WAS TIRED!!

so at 10:20pm we were home. I had Jack to deal with and get to bed. He has always been a happy drunk but over the time I have known him he's slowly becoming a happy+emotional drunk the emotions mainly being his love for me....so I heard how much he loves me and only wants to do the best for me. Wants me to be happy and healthy etc. The conversation somehow got on to sex. He wanted sucking off apparently (for the record I have NEVER done that - not into that) so I told him no XD he then wanted sex to which I said "I dont think youll get it up jack" XD he said probably not and resigned himself to getting ready for bed. sweet jesus. if only his mother knew

We climbed into bed at 11:15pm. He laid down and 5mins later shot up saying "I think I am going to be sick" -_____- baring in mind our carpets are less than a week old and I cleaned the bathroom really well only that afternoon... If he was about to toss up his guts I was not gonna be impressed.

I came to see if he was ok after 5mins and he said he was ok and went to bed and passed out I think.

I had asked him whilst he was drunk if he wanted a bacon buttie in the morning to which he said he does and that I am amazing and he loves me and yeah....you get the picture!

so I woke up today at 5am, then 7am then at 7:20am I got up and put the oven on.

I got Oz out and then went about doing Jack's hangover breakfast as there was no doubt in my mind that he would be hungover.

I did him 3 bacon slices on each cob, an omelette on each cob and 1 hash brown to top it off in each cob. Yup that topped with tomato sauce - beautiful

I have never been hungover but have learned from my brother that its calories and beige that nurse a hangover. Jack got up 10mins before his breakfast was ready, I sat him in the dark lounge with a coffee and told him id bring him his breakfast.

He took a photo of it and sent it to the lads, as he was so impressed with what I had made for him.

by 9:15am he had been revived with food, coffee and paracetamol and was able to come help me shop

so we did our food shop then called in B&Q for a lightbulb and wood then Boots for nappies for work.

we came back and I was done in! Jack unloaded the shopping and I had a cup of tea~

I was quite tired all day but its been the best I have felt all holiday, typical on my last day of the holidays! Glad I have a week off!

So today I did some house work and made my soup, Jack did the grass and did house work

then we went for a walk, only a short one as I was tired but wanted to do a walk with Jack as we havent been able to during the holidays

Mum and dad came over for an hour to see fences and carpets and other stuff

and dad is going to help with my new desk ^^

I did dinner whilst Jack went in the shower, we had dinner then I was looking at furniture for the living room, think I found something but we are gonna think about it.

I might do some exercise tonight, not sure yet. I am tired and got stomach pain from dinner

i have Oz to sit with yet too and a bath to have and.....ugh

tomorrow

Jo is off sick :/ 

I will be taking Jack to work and hoping he gets dropped off by someone.

Not sure how I will spend my day, probably cleaning and sorting out my craft room