Monday, 28 June 2021

I managed my first half day

 Evening~~


I was a bit tense last night ^^; we were in bed for 9:45pm but it took me an hour to fall asleep

I woke up at 1:30am needing a massive wee but ended up falling over twice in the bedroom!!

Its those antidepressants, they mess with a lot in the head

to say I fell over twice in the bedroom, it did not wake the sleeping Jack.....0.0"

How is that possible? Anyway I took my time and walked slowly to the bathroom

Luckily I fell asleep til morning, didnt want to get up and face the day but I did

I did my morning yoga and gave Oz his morning carrot and locked him up in the garage

no point in taking him to mum for a few hours


School, ahhhhh I managed I guess

I did keep feeling dizzy and heart was beating out of rhythm 

Jack told me if I all I did today was socialise then that is fine. He wants me to build my confidence back up and enjoy work so  I have a positive experience. I did socialise a fair amount but I also wanted to prep my lessons if only so Jack wouldnt have to do my biology lessons. Luckily I only had 1 lesson to do and it was running stuff off the photocopier. done.

I was struggling to get through my 4 hours tho I have to say

but as soon as it got to my 4 hours Jack announced it and said I could go home

I didnt waste any time and was out the door!


I got home at 12:15, got Oz in and had my soup with him. Then I had an hour in bed

when I got up I spent like the next 3 hours+ in the kitchen

I did loads and made lots of mess too XD

I made fish cakes, just made the recipe up as I went along but they turned out great

I made biscuits using a recipe I saw on youtube, but I adapted that.

I cooked my breakfast chicken for the week

I made dinner

did the washing up so Jack wouldnt despair at the sheer amount of pots and mess ^^;

he really appreciated the meal but told me he would like me to actually rest tomorrow. I struggle to rest even when I am tired. I am sure I am ADHD


After dinner I did a bit of painting, I just keep doing bits and pieces to it. I think its coming together but I think it looks like a 5 year old has done it.....

Oz is playing out in the drizzling rain like hes some feral uncared for bunny. 

I need to do some exercise as I havent done any today and I will hear from my body if I do nothing

I feel chubs, Jack keeps telling me I am not fat and I know I am not but I do wonder what I weigh. When I walked past the classrooms today I could see my reflection in the glass doors and I think my legs look skinny. I dont see how they can be. Who knows


tonight just exercise and not sure what else, might do more on my painting


tomorrow

is school~~ I hope I get through the day T^T 

then I will try take it easy when I come home at midday ><

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