Evening
Did not get to sleep til 3am! Joy!
could not sleep
jack txted at 12:30am also stating he could not sleep
he stayed awake til 2am when i said to him not to stay up for me
as i was going downstairs to play disgaea anyway
i had taken a lot of medication and i wasnt in any pain
i just could not shut off mentally
in the end i took more pain killers (no i shouldnt but i did) just to try knock me out!
I woke up at 8:30am so at least i wasnt late up
it did mean id only had 5 hours sleep but better than nothing
i sat with the girls this morning
and then had a shower and went for a walk with mum
then i finished off my inu x boku picture!
it is done and my brother and mum both think it is good enough to give to jack
so i have ordered a frame for it
i went to sleep for a bit
i have been in pain for days now and a constant headache
i dont usually get headaches so im unsure why i am suffering with them for a like a week now
maybe its stress? who knows but they are wearing
i got through the post my expensive bias binding
so i decided to finish my place mats
and ta-da!
theyre all finished ^^
jack likes them
so i have stashed them away now
leaves me with what shall i do for my next project
i did he picture for science which took a few minute sbut hopefully it is right this time
i spoke to him on the phone and he sat talking to me and theo which was nice
we are missing one another it is hard -____-
i wish i could show him the inu x boku piece so i could cheer him up
i said i want to design some coasters and get them made/printed
so i have asked him if he requests any designs
i might start the rabbit quilt i was going to save for summer
i will look tomorrow at the sheer amount of rabbit fabric i have stashed over the years
i dont think i have loads but hopefully enough to do something with anyway
i had a flick through my craft books earlier for inspiration but nothing took my fancy
and quilt wise i think im on my own with designing this one
my skin is so sore and dry and it doesnt help me scratching in my sleep ether!
i have ordered products that i am waiting to try out!
i have 6 tabs lined up currently with dances i am gonna quickly do
then i shall sit with my lad then i might do my nails tonight
tomorrow i might do digital drawing and plan out the rabbit quilt
Konbanwa~~
I managed to get off to sleep but woke up at 12:30 due to being able to feel blood on my fingers...yes thats nice and normal isnt it! I was scratching, again T_T
this is something i have been doing again lately as i do it in my sleep when i am stressed or mentally just not good. and given everything going off right now im surprised im doing it i am surprised however by waking up to the feel of blood rather than the pain of scratching myself til i bleed!!! thats just mental. and annoying so i ended up getting up for a bit and playing my switch and went back to bed for 2am
this morning i sat with with my girls
truffle climbed all over tillie and tillie was shrieking and screaming
i had to cuddle tillie til she calmed down but she is mardy and truffle couldnt care less who she walks all over >.>
I made biscuits this morning and i made a soup
did 15mins of yoga and 15mins of dance then went for a shower
had my soup and continued with my inu x boku
which is almost done!
i fell asleep and then went for a walk with mum
so i have done a full hour of exercises today
talked to jack on the phone he seems alright
he wants me to do the drawing again which is fine
i told him i havent done any work today XD
i will do tho tomorrow
he isnt doing a lot of work cus theres not a lot to actually do
he said head of science had his twin baby girls today and i just thought how scary that must be right now, having babies in hospitals....not ideal
i have my physio exercises to do tonight
been doing them for 3 months now
i have my appointment 6th april i need to ring up to see if it is still even happening
i havent done much else today really
tomorrow i will finish the inu x boku picture and then do my work my actual work
and maybe pick something else to draw/make
tomorrow i would have had Oz 3 years!
my skin is sore...im ordering stuff online to try help heal my skin
i hope i sleep tonight -_____-
Evening~
I didnt blog yesterday as I really quite poorly
I hadn't slept well due to having a nightmare about being held down on the floor by monsters/demons and them discussing who would be first to rape me
i hate my rape nightmares...
when I woke up i couldnt open my eyes fully it was strange, my head killed like proper bad headache and my head couldnt process quick enough what my eyes were seeing so i felt dizzy constantly
it was strange, I ached i was shattered and sweating A LOT but i was shivering
i stayed in bed all day, in and out of sleep, on my switch, reading
just in bed as i couldnt do anything and when my head hurt too much from looking at a screen i went to sleep. mum woke me for dinner but said my bed was wet
i had sweated a lot.... she made me go for a second shower >.>
my family were all a bit worried and cautious as they wondered if it was me just being poorly or if i had got the virus
i didnt speak to jack as i just wanted to be left alone also if i told him i was poorly he'd only worry
this morning i woke up fine, no headache or fever and i could open my eyes all the way ^^
i felt soooooo much better
so i was glad
and each family member asked how i was feeling
think they were relieved that covid-19 wasnt in the house XD
i did 45mins of yoga this morning
phoned jack but didnt stay on the phone long i didnt have much to say as id been poorly and the art im working on currently might be a birthday present for him
and he's only been gaming. he says this was how his life was before me and work
just inside constantly gaming
sad life huh
ive gotten used to him in glasses tho i have to say
i worked a bit on the inu x boku picture i have done one half
i think its coming along ok but i havent shown it anyone yet so i might ask mum later see what she thinks on how its coming along
i went for a walk too which was bitter >< i went by myself as well
theres loads of police around its strange
even tho i live in a small village/town they are bothering to police it
i thought they'd put their efforts in more densely populated areas :/
i was sad earlier as i found out that Monogatari - a group i LOVE have disbanded...
i watched their last live today
i cant believe theyve disbanded and before their major debut too :(
such talent gone to waste
wont be learning anymore of their dances then T^T
tomorrow i guess i have some actual work to do
i shall make a start designing the school internet logo
i can have a go :/ anything is better than what it is XD
i will work on my inu x boku picture more
and if jack dares send any pictures that need drawing i will have them to draw also >.>
theres a science department meeting tomorrow at 9am online
i told jack i aint attending as theres no point after looking at the agenda its all for teachers
and i personally dont feel like webcaming the staff...feels weird
ive been playing disgaea and getting screwed over by demons
i forget how much that game screws you over
bloody demons XD but its been nice to play
not sure what game i will play next tho i have to say
hope i sleep tonight
im starting to ache and sweat and my head hurts a bit too now
Yo~~
I was up til 2am...
I had taken A LOT of pain relief as I was aching and didnt want to feel
and i wanted to sleep!
but could i sleep.....nooooooo
i was just laying there feeling really quite sick if im honest
my stomach was making all sorts of noises too like id actually poisoned it
i got up in the end and went downstairs to play on my switch for a bit
til 1:30am then i read in bed for a bit
i got up at 9am so i missed seeing the girls this morning :(
but i sat outside and watched them on the grass and Oz came to see me too
this morning i did 20mins of dancing but wasnt really feeling
however i have practically finished another dance! just got to improve it really
my idea of recording dances i think has gone tits up as my family is home (apart from dad) and also if i went to record outside somewhere id probably get fined for it
my brother was alone on a skate park today on his BMX and a policeman told him to go ride else where! like nanny state, my brother was not impressed
i had a shower and checked my emails and such
chris still hadnt got back to fully about drawing so i was off the hook for now
jack wanted to video call me - to show me his new glasses
so we talked for a while i always find video calling hard as i hate looking at myself!
and oddly ive kinda gotten used to him with glasses already
its like it suits him, ages him about 5 years but does suit him
i just look totally weird with glasses on
i think hes chilled out about work a bit he doesnt seem to worried about it all so much and has an idea what work he can get on with
he later emailed me wanting a potassium manganate practical diagram drawing
he gave me a rough one he did on paint and i laughed XD so i did him a good one but i havent heard from him yet if its any good but certainly better than what he can do...
i contacted my cousin to see how she was doing
i was sad to find out her rabbit died this week...and she didnt tell me ether which saddened me further i have to say. poor little guy
i havent fallen asleep today
i was going to but mum rounded me up for a walk
i found walking hard as i was tired and i think hayfever has started to kick in as i wheezing a bit
my mum brought a random night face cream from TK MAXX several weeks ago and has been enjoying it but it sad she cant find anymore. so i looked on ebay and i brought a 3 piece set for her so same brand but different facial products to use. i surprised her with it last night and she was very very happy and was grateful so i was happy ^^
i ordered some expensive bias binding last night online so i can finish my place mats
heres it cut and stuck down
here's is up to now so its all stitched just needs the bias binding for the border
jack really likes them so i am happy ^^
i did some drawing, inu x boku manga page
im thinking of doing for jack for his birthday as we both like inu x boku
so i started water colouring it today and was quickly reminded how bad my water colouring skills are...im hoping it will look ok once it is finished if its not good enough for his birthday then i shall do something else. i was doing it anyway but kinda wondered if it would turn out good enough for a gift.
tomorrow
might have more work drawing to actually do
and i might plan out a quilt i have been saving to do for the summer holidays
not sure yet
see how i feel as tonight i have a solid headache and i ache
i feel quite tired and rough actually im hoping im not coming down with anything
feels weird it will be a weekend and i wont be escaping to jack's
Konbanwa~~
I struggled to sleep and tossed and turned in my sleep a fair bit
I woke up at 5:55am -___-
as i was aching and thirsty i got up at 6:10am
starting the day at that sodding time >.>
i just wanted pain killers
I let Oz out and it was another frosty morning but Oz isnt arsed most of the time
I thought Id try and take a few snaps of him
my baby boy, he is certainly a round bunny X3 my pork bun
he was happy but then pretty much spent the rest of the day sunning himself
as we've had another sunny day~
I had my occupational health phone call today
lasted 30mins
it was fine just had questions about my health really not a lot else to say
then it will be written up and head quarters gets a copy, jack a copy, and me a copy
no one else which is good. and jack only gets one as hes my manager
'manager' XD
I told him i'd had the phone call and he said he was fetching his glasses
i havent txted him back or spoke to him today
i had a shower after my phone call
and continued working on my place mats
and i practically finished them i just dont have any bias binding :/
cant buy any from shops for weeks so i may end up just paying more and buying online or waiting til i can actually buy some from stores but id like them finished and finish them whilst i have a lot of free time
speaking of free time mine going to disappear, I looked how much work chris wants and its a lot and i asked him questions on what ive got to do but he wasnt clear in his reply so i havent been able to start yet as i think hes still waiting for some information
i need to make the most of the free time i have now
I fell asleep around 1pm for a bit
i just wanted to sleep
played on my switch for a bit
dug out my cross stitch i started like over a year ago but didnt finish so i might do some of that
i went for a walk with mum
there was a cat on the country road, it had its hairs up on its back and it batted what i thought was a stone but when i looked at the 'stone' i saw it was breathing...
it was a shrew...
so i shooed the cat away
and i picked it up and it was shaking in my hand
my god it was soooooooooo cute
even in its shock like state i found it cute
they weigh from 5-12grams
i checked it over which was easy to do as it was just quivering and not moving
it didnt have any injuries luckily, so im guessing the cat had just found it
so i covered it over with my other hand so it would be in darkness
and i walked into the woods, mum waited
and i found a bushy area not to far away and i let it go and i watched it slowly walk off
so im glad i saved it but also glad it was healthy
and we walked home
would have loved to have brought it home, theyre so damn cute X3
I did some yoga as i was aching
seems to unfair that i ache even tho i do exercise
but i think its cus im slightly stressed over the current situation and stress makes Jo ache
just the way of the illness
so kinda dreading tonight but i will dose myself up
tomorrow
i have some drawing i want or need to do
probably exercise too as per usual
bit weird that i cant go shops or see jack
feels like life years ago when i was sick
my dad is still working but i think hes gonna struggle working in the next few days as everywhere is closing really. I can not imagine life with him constantly 0.0 there will literally be murder in this house i think....
Evening
It took a while to sleep last night, even with Flump, I had a lot on my mind
mainly 'can i go 3 weeks without seeing jack?'
I woke up at 7:30am, turned over and next thing i knew it was 8:30am 0.0
i looked and there was 6 plushes on the floor...
usually there isnt any or if there is theres just one
i made sure to tell jack this and I said "i think Flump was getting rid of the competition in the night" he said "yeah seems like something he'd do" XD
In the morning I did 15mins of dance and 15mins of yoga
i felt quite tired so i didnt push it
then i cleaned Oz out which of course he supervised
hes everywhere and its hard not to tread on him!
i had a shower
jack phoned me
bored already XD
he was stressing a bit about work but i think i managed to ease his concerns
he will chill out im sure
hes missing me
says he gets his new glasses tomorrow and will video call me tomorrow with them on
i keep joking saying i have a glasses fetish XD
then i worked a bit on my sewing
i got it all cut out and now just need to sew it now really
i sent jack how far i am and he was happy with it
our house is gonna be so nerdy XD
I saw people's art online and someone had framed their gameboy color and i feel tempted to do that myself but not sure yet
i have other projects i can be getting on with
i want some A3 card but shops are closed arent they T^T
chris sent me a txt at 5pm saying he had sent me an email >.>
i have looked at it and its A LOT of work -____- my god its a lot
but i will get through it im sure
i just rather be doing my own stuff XD
tomorrow i will work on my sewing i guess
and maybe start chris's work T^T
i really ache tonight for some reason
and im so god damn tired despite sleeping around noon today
so as much as im tired and want to go to bed im also a bit anxious about it simply because of how much i do ache...we shall see
Evening
I slept over at jack's yesterday
i went over 3pm
in the morning i managed an hour of exercise, i did 45min dance 15min yoga
woo!
and i made soup and biscuits then went for a shower and got my stuff together
at jack's we went for a walk in the city park which was pretty dead
picked up something for dinner
made dinner and then finished chrono crusade which i think jack liked
then we went to bed, i did one level of disgaea but it was 11pm by this point
and i wanted sleep!
this morning we had to get up as jack had a skype meeting with head of science at 9:30am
i for one couldnt be arsed to get up so i let jack get up before me
he made me breakfast ^^ tea cakes~
he had his meeting whilst i talked to theo
from the meeting i learned that unless any staff members give me any work to do i have nothing to do :/ which im not complaining about it just feels weird you know?
jack has safety stuff to do regarding practicals and julia is making revision stuff for her daughter which she will share with science so out the 3 of us so far i have the least to do but could change
if they decide they want art then i could have hours of work!
we cut jack's hair which i weirdly enjoy doing
he has an electric razor thing and just shaves it short, i was making fun of it curling round his ears which it does when it gets like 2cm long so he cut it as he'd had enough of my teasing XD
after he went for a shower and i played on my switch in bed
he came out the shower and he looked perplexed and i asked him what was up
he said that he'd just read the news
that were not suppose to meeting up really
and it goes on for at least 3 weeks
i said "yeah but how they gonna police that? just say youre going pharmacy, simple"
but jack being a stickler for the rules didnt like that response and went into over drive of the rights and wrongs of it all. honestly he is always so worried about doing the wrong thing whereas im always like "sod the rules" once again one of our many differences
so he got dressed in silence whilst i cuddled flump on the bed
he came and cuddled me and said
"right jo you have 3 choices. first choice you stay home for 3 weeks. second choice you stay with me for 3 weeks and last choice is that you say sod the rules and go to and from our homes"
i let it sink in what he was saying
that basically i could end up not seeing him for 3 weeks. we struggle more than 24 hours apart so how are we gonna cope with this?
i said "i can look after my health better at home. theres room for yoga and dance and i have my medication. I also have my Oz. I also dont think i could put on you for 3 weeks it doesnt feel fair. and i get the feeling you dont like the idea of me breaking the rules"
he held me tighter and said
"its true you have Oz and you have all your needs taken care of at home as theres no where to dance or do yoga here is there. its just gonna be so hard not having you around or seeing you"
he was quiet for a moment and i wondered if he was gonna cry to be honest
i know hes stressed out about this virus but its not forever is it.
i said "i worry about my mental health tho as sometimes i detached myself from everything if im struggling or if something is too painful."
he said "Jo if youre ever struggling with anything just please come over i dont care about the rules i need you to be well, mentally and physically"
we left his bedroom and went for a walk
but i could tell he had a lot on his mind
so i didnt enjoy it all that much but i was still trying to saver the time with him
we got back and he installed google teams on my laptop so i can talk to staff freely he also showed me how to access my work emails.
and then i grabbed my stuff and grabbed flump and i went home
kinda hasnt sunk in that i wont see him for 3 weeks
gonna be a long 3 weeks
apart of me knows ill probably see him in those 3 weeks
i will crack no doubt
i got home and saw my mum and Oz
then i went to sleep for 40mins and i went for another walk but with mum this time
i got back and went on my laptop
then i had dinner which was pasta - my first pasta of the year!
it was sooooo good ^^
now i have been sorting through fabrics as id like to make a couple more place mats for when i move out so im making Haunter one and a Mudkip one as jack said he likes mudkip
i will start those tomorrow~
tomorrow i will probably dance and do some sewing and drawing
not a lot else to do in the world is there right now
thank god i have hobbies 0.0
these 3 weeks will be testing tho
Evening
took me til 11:30pm to actually sleep my stomach was in knots but i was trying to tune off to everything my head was going off about
i slept til 6:30am, and i had woken in the same position i had fallen asleep in...
very strange for me! i move loads in sleep i know i do
i wanted to go back to sleep but no such luck, needed pain killers
so i got up at 6:45am...on a sunday T^T
so i had a quiet morning til 8am when i knew my parents were up
i made mum a cup of tea, brought her her mother's day card and the guinea pigs all in bed
i couldnt make much of a fuss with her given the virus situation everywhere is shut
but a brew, card and pigs in bed was appreciated ^^
i then went on my laptop for a bit then crawled back into bed
i was cold and tired and didnt really have anything much to do
i got up at 11 and went for a shower
then i went for a walk, had lunch did 40mins of yoga
finished my shana picture
mum says its really good
but yeah i think its alright i guess
might do another manga picture, maybe inu x boku
trying to pick mangas me and jack both know
so i had a flick through the entire series on my shelf for a page to use from inu x boku
and i think i found one, its just not as dynamic as the shana one
i might have a stab at it
sat and played disgaea5 then looked online at what games id like to play next for the switch
not a lot shouted out to me which is why i didnt buy a switch in the first place - a lack of games i would like to play. but i think tales of vespaire or something seemed kinda ok
i was thinking fire emblem but i cant be bothered with it.
gonna do my nails tonight but will just do a normal manicure i think
not in the mood to do nice nails
i dont know why but things dont feel well in Jo's world
maybe its the uncertainty of it all and the fact i have been stripped of all my routine
i just havent felt happy really
i know theres people out there worse i get that, i mean mentally i havent felt happy
im sure i will snap out of it
i got a txt this morning from school stating there was no meeting anymore in the morning
jack says he isnt going into school tomorrow i could not believe it, he actually isnt going in! strange world we are in right now! i felt sure he was going in even if it was just for an hour!
so i have no clue what is happening now tomorrow as i was gonna pick him up at lunch time and go to his but thats no happening now but i guess i can still see him tho
Konbanwa~~~
I went over to jack's last night
we sat with theo for a bit
I told jack i didnt want to talk about work or corona for the rest of the night
he was fine with that
we ate chocolate in bed and played switchs
i could not sleep tho
still had a lot on my mind, i was aching, i was hot, i was cold
so I got up went for a wee and took my pyjama bottoms off and crawled back into bed
but i feel i woke up every hour
so i was exhausted this morning
then i had jack perving on me cus i was in a top and pants XD
this morning we were up pretty early
we had breakfast and a brew and i had a bath
then we were gonna go out for a walk
and theo asked if he could join
hes working from home and the gyms are shut i think he feels a bit lost as his everyday routine of work and gym have been taken from him so i said of course he can join us
to say we walked in the park near the city centre it was empty
we saw from a distance the city centre streets - empty
quite weird i have to say
we got back at 11:30am and i went to bed, id had enough
jack and theo just played on their switchs
i woke up and we had lunch
then i sat and worked on my shana picture
i got a lot done at jack's and he said how good it was but im not quite so sure yet
i went home at 4:30pm
i could have stayed the night but he wanted to play this online space game with theo and harvey and i couldnt be bothered with dealing with hearing that XD
i got back and worked on my picture a bit more
its almost done i just have a bit more to do and its done
its helped me keep my sanity this weekend anyway
jack has talked to me a bit about work
like whats happening
basically monday 8:30 there is a school meeting and 9am department meetings
both of which i cant attend as im still not allowed back in school T^T
so jack said he'd fill me in
but he thinks from sounds of it that us as technicians will work from home but very little is expected of us as our work is hard to do from home,no home contains a lab! so yeah he said i will be doing mainly art - ideas of which, chris has things he wants drawing for IT and jack said the science student booklets would benefit from proper diagrams not ones from google images. so i think thats my jobs, jack said hes got stuff online to do and will show me how to access my work stuff from home on monday. thats as much as i know really
tomorrow no plans as of yet
i will finish shana, and maybe do some dancing
i have ordered a new camera battery as my camera doesnt hold charge anymore, i was struggling to record dances as it literally would record for 5mins then shut off so i only got 1 attempt at a dance if i screwed up id have to charge it up again. another reason why i havent been able to record but hopefully with free time and a new battery i can record again~
thats all for now~
Evening
Bit earlier tonight as Im off to jack's in a bit
Could not sleep again....again up til 2am!!
so frustrating
I couldnt switch off my brain just thinking about stuff that doesnt matter at midnight
then i scratch
i scratch when im stressed and or anxious
its a horrible habit one i do even in my sleep!
so i starting scratching and as weird as it sounds i can just keep scratching despite the pain cus its a different pain to my everyday fibromylgia pain i like to feel a different pain and tune into that instead my 'normal' pain. I suppose a bit like self harmers
so i ended up getting up before i bled in my pyjamas
i played disgaea and ate a couple of biscuits then went to bed at 2am
today i got up and walked to the corner shop with mum
it was empty no milk no bread no nothing really
so we walked home with nothing
we got back and i trimmed truffs's fur
she wasnt very good at being still so its not the best job i have done on her
then we bathed them later on cus they were minging
i mean truffs was bloody grey she was that gross
truffs had her freedom fight in the bath and her claws are sharp so she literally cut my wrists open
it didnt hurt really but i dont know why shes being so feisty today
so now theyre like fluffy toys
i danced for 20mins which i enjoyed
then i showered
i did some more of manga picture
just water coloured it so it has the base colour now
now i have 1000s of dots to do....
im hoping it works
its an idea i had in my head so a bit of an experiment really
i had lunch and went to bed
i was shattered
woke up and made some biscuits woooo
ive been sitting with oz as well today
did a bit of online shopping too, just house stuff for next year cus i have the time to actually browse the world of ebay
i might take pictures of all my goodies when they arrive.
tonight i am staying at jacks
i know that doesnt classify as self isolating but i think id know if jack was sick what with him having asthma so i think i am safe and i miss him and he sounds like hes had a week of it so i wanna make him happy^^ im taking my sketch book to work in as i dont think we will be going out much really. and theres only so much i can play on my switch!
thats it really
oh i got this in the post, its a new cushion cover about 40cm and i won it for £3!! its so cute
its for my house next year
Evening~~
Did not sleep well
i mean i know i slept a fair bit during the day but i couldnt switch off
i had a million things going through my head
so at 12:30am i got up and played on disgaea for a bit
then i had a hot chocolate whilst watching calming live jpop songs
ahhhh Kalafina is good for the lonely soul in the early hours of the morning~
I didnt even sleep that well when i went to bed at 2am!
woke up loads -_______-
i woke up at 7am and crawled into mums bed as dad was already up as usual
it was nice crawling into bed with her
but i can never stay long as i ache
jack knows this XD hence why we never get to lay in together
anyway this morning i saw my girls and things
it is weird being at home, but not being allowed out ether...
i was so tired all god damn day
like didnt matter what i ate or how much i ate i got no energy
so ive slept a lot
i did go out for a walk cus i needed air
i sat and drew this in about 10mins or so
im gonna work on it more tomorrow
its shana from shakugan no shana
spoke to jack on the phone for 40mins tonight
seeing how he is and how school is
its all kicked off
its amazing the damage this virus is doing
like seriously
cant wait for it to blow over
tomorrow i am gonna work on my picture more and hopefully see jack~
Oz has been enjoying having me home tho X3
ive been buying stuff online too~
woo for online shopping which im surprised is still happening!
Evening
Didn't sleep well due to being a bit stressed
i know i have been stressed and anxious about school
ive been scratching in my sleep again so my skin is sore -_____-
I got to school and as usual on a wednesday there is staff meeting
but being lowly technicians, we never attend
but science teachers came back and said that basically
"what the head master said today was that, if you have any health issues, to go see him"
so a few science staff went off to see him
a bit later 2 came back confirming they would be sent home due to health issues and being at risk with the virus, well more at risk anyway
jack said I should go talk to the head teacher...
i didnt want to cus i dont like drawing attention to myself
but orders are orders
so i went down to his office and told him whats what
and he said "so how is your immune system then?"
i said "weak due to having an auto immune disease, many illnesses on top which stresses my body out further so it takes me a while to kick any viruses"
he said "no debate you are to go home"
and that was that
so reluctantly i walked back to the prep room to tell jack
he wasnt surprised, to be honest i wasnt, i just didnt want it confirmed
i didnt want to leave him. that would be both me and julia not there to help him
he said he would be fine and is cancelling all practicals
i told him the biology ones were going ahead today as i have prepped them
he was fine with that
i still didnt want to go tho
it was only 9:30am! and i was leaving
i didnt even get to say bye to any staff cus they were all teaching....
i got home and mum was home so i had a brew with her and filled her in
im to stay home 'self isolate' which i think is stupid when you live with people
and i get full pay, so im not complaining, its not taken out of my holidays or sick time
and they will let me know when i can come back
mum was happy to have me home of course and she and dad have both been worried for me
so i think theyre kinda relieved im home safe
today i spent a lot of the time sleeping
i have been exhausted but i think its cus i have been stressed
doesnt half take it out on my body
so i slept
did 50mins of yoga and dance, should have recorded myself it was a good sesh XD
had a shower as i got sweaty
went back to bed ><
researched online home crafts anything i wanna do kinda thing
and yeah about it
rang jack to see if hes ok
and he survived the day
i think he basically told the teachers to sod off XD
he was making sure chemicals were safe
i need him to kill my e.coli too
it feels weird being at home i dont feel settled somehow and i told him that
and i told him im missing him and wanna see him at the weekend
he seems alright tho
tomorrow i guess i will please myself
no yoga ether tomorrow
i wanna do some drawing maybe, need to practice dances as i bet i could get some recorded really
evening
didnt sleep well despite having a nice relaxing evening last night
last night i discovered that the convention has been postponed til june.................
you what!!??
i was looking forward to that damn it!!!
all cus of this damn virus
and whats more is that we got a txt from karen last night saying shes shutting her yoga studio down for a while cus of the virus
hope you're happy china >.>
all the good things taken away from me
and you know
im still at work!!!!!
why are we still at school!?
seems so damn unfair >.>
i drove to work and got to work 15mins early...the roads were oddly quiet
think its cus people are self isolating and working from home
i got to school and julia rang up - shes not coming it
not coming in for 2 weeks...
what!?
julia is never not in, whats the crack!?
her daughter is coughing and high temperature and new guidelines state if someone in your household is showing these symptoms you have to stay at home for 2 weeks -____-
so thats julia gone
i was stressing as theres normally so much chemistry going off
she told me to be careful
a lot of staff kept asking "you alright Jo?" "should you be in Jo?"
how do i know? i feel fine and i want to continue as normally if i can
also it says on the govenment website that if you have underlining health issues to stay at home. but doesnt actually list what health issues. are we talking asthma or cancer here?
do i stay home or not?
ether way im staying to support jack
who was very stressed what with having julia off
so today has been full on running around im shattered
and survived off a lot of sugar 0.0
i got home early cus i started work early
i had a brew with Oz and mum and nearly went to bed afterwards but somehow stayed awake
and even pushed myself to go for a walk which i sorta enjoyed
i havent done much else really
got my physio exercises to do but cant say i can be bothered to do em >.>
but i will i guess
tomorrow its school
i mostly stay at jacks on a wednesday but i cant be bothered
he did ask but i managed to politely put him off saying he will probably be tired and grouchy after work what with all the work that needs to be done
mainly checking no chemicals will explode if were off school for a while
it sadly means as well i will have to kill my e.coli ><
i like my bacteria its done well ^^
anyway this damn virus best shut the school
i want time off damn it seeing as it taken everything else away from me
i cant moan
others have it much much worse
just annoying all this mass hysteria and panic buying and the fact its all people can talk about, i say all this but you watch it will be me who gets it XD
I'm back
couldnt be bothered to do my diary basically!
so last week I had my blood test
did not pass out but felt my heart stutter which was strange
but it was good on me for not passing out
I have since had my results and all is well
i didnt really want to go to hospital for further tests what with the virus around, i dont want to catch it or put any more stress on doctors so im leaving any further testing
the doctor said he'd refer me if i pass out again tho
so fair enough
my weekend was spent at jack's
it was nice
i went shopping really on saturday
not that i got anything amazing
i did however get a new stitch plushie ^^
hes in an easter bunny suit and was reduced from £20 to £12 ^^
i came home each day tho to see Oz
and sunday i had Oz in my room which he loved ^^
i like to make sure he knows hes loved and wanted
about it really
cant really be bothered to report in on my week
today school was alright
hard work as it usually is despite me not having any practicals
i felt a bit stressed about work tho
thursday i came home 90mins early as i felt if i continued i was going to faint
so i left for home
as soon as i walked through the door i cried
id had enough basically
and i was stressed over the weekend thinking how im gonna get through work
i was getting so wound up by it i was hearing noises - tunes
which is part of psychosis and it acts up on me when i get stressed
it even woke me a few times as i felt i could hear things even whilst asleep!
today at work i kept hearing tunes
does my head in
even when i play music i can hear them >.>
i brought flowers for mum this weekend
as next weekend is mother's day and i have the convention so i'll be too dead to buy flowers
well i hope we have convention depends on this bloody corona virus
sick of hearing about it
does my head in
and the panic buying is actually boardline crazy
like its the end of the world
1000s of people die of flu each year but we dont rave about that >.>
anyway moving on
tomorrow just school really
nothing amazing
convention best still be on this weekend
